Friday Thoughts
Hey! Can we discuss some Friday Thoughts?
I wanted to check in and give an update on many of the loose ends that we’ve discussed in the last few Friday Thought’s posts + share some of the random thoughts going through my head space that always make it into these posts. 🙂
Here we go! (I kind of feel like Henry the Polish Hen is very much summing up my reaction to 2021 so far.)
1) Catch Up:
- finally listened to Boys in the Boat and really, really liked it. We also watched the PBS documentary Boys of ’36 as a family, and it was very interesting!
- feeling called to repentance after my declaration of hating yoga in this post; I took your suggestions (dozens and dozens of them!) to give Yoga with Adriene a try, and, welp, you guys were right (no surprise). She’s really great. I’ve been doing her shorter videos, 10-20 minutes, several times a week, and I can definitely say I don’t hate yoga quite as much and my pesky hip pain is manageable. I’ve even converted several other friends, so I guess you could say I’ve gained a testimony of Yoga with Adriene, which is quite a miracle.
- delivered books to the elementary school; finally! With covid protocols, it took a while for the elementary school to open for visitors/donations, which delayed our simple cultural outreach book project. I was excited to finally deliver these books to our elementary school. Here is a list of the books we donated. We bought most of the books from EyeSeeMe bookstore. I hope to continue this cultural awareness/literacy project next year and get our community and other families involved!
2) Resolutions: I hope we can still be friends, but I’m not one for a lot of goal setting when the new year rolls around.
I almost always start each new year a tiny bit exhausted from the holidays (2020 took this to a whole new level), and I’ve learned that I get really overwhelmed with a bunch of new goals staring me in the face.
I do better focusing on getting through each day without completely inhaling an entire bag of chocolate chips. Just me?
When I do make goals, I try to keep them simple and achievable, like making time in my planner (yes, my devoted paper planner) for daily scripture reading and a couple days of exercise each week. Things like that.
A couple overall wishes I have for myself this year is to get rid of a few non-essential projects and stop managing other people’s emotions. Wish me luck. Haha.
Are you a new year’s resolutioner? What’s your style?
3) Holiday Game: thanks to my longtime blogging buddy, Rachel R., for sending me this game idea in time for the holidays. Klask {aff. link} was the ultimate holiday gift winner. It is so, so fun! I couldn’t wait until my end-of-year game gift guide to tell you about it. We are still playing it nonstop.
Not gonna lie, I’m pretty good. (16-year old is currently heatedly debating this fact with me.)
Any favorite Christmas finds/gifts to share?
4) Homemade gifts: for Christmas, we decided, or rather, I dictated, that the kids would make homemade gifts for each other. They always choose another sibling’s name for a Christmas gift anyway, but this year, the focus was on intentionally thought out homemade gifts. The only criteria: it had to be homemade and a level above popsicle stick binoculars.
Despite the moans and groans at the onset and some very last minute pushes (i.e. Christmas Eve) to get things finished, complete with a few moments of impatient mom-shouting (not proud, but it’s the reality), it ended up being one of the best moments of Christmas.
The kids loved opening and seeing what their siblings made them, and they were genuinely excited and grateful because they each had experienced the effort that went in to making a gift for someone else.
Let’s see, we had a crocheted scarf and painted treasure box, a hand-carved sword, and a homemade pillowcase, among a few other delights. I haven’t yet broken the news that we’re making this a yearly tradition.
Also, my 14-year old just said to me as I was typing up this post: “in a million years, I never imagined I’d be able to sew anything.” He followed that up with: “and I don’t plan to ever again.” And then finally: “are you going to pay me for posting my picture on the internet?”
5) Arthritis in My Hands: notwithstanding the fact that we literally cannot stuff one more blanket (or stuffed animal, for that matter) in our home, I decided to not be a hypocrite with the whole “make someone a homemade gift thing” and crochet each of the kids and Brian a blanket for Christmas.
I brushed off my very rusty crocheting skills, and got to work on this one-stitch pattern. Easiest pattern ever. The reason these blankets are unique and amazing is because of the bernat blanket yarn (JoAnns or Michaels with 40% coupons!), and the resulting blanket is addictively soft and cuddly.
I didn’t give myself a whole lot of time, and ended up crocheting into the very, very late hours of the night (er, morning) almost every night in December, but I finished by the skin of my teeth with gnarled, sore, arthritic hands and bloodshot eyes.
Now my goal is to get one made for myself so I don’t keep stealing Brian or the kid’s blankets when we’re watching a movie. Let’s hope my still-aching hands can get this last one made before 2025.
6) Rock Climbing: a new hobby for our family, and we are hooked thanks to Brian’s parents giving us a two month membership for a gift this year. Most of us got belay certified, and let me just say: it’s interesting putting ultimate trust in one of your kids to keep you safe as you scale up a freakishly tall wall.
And by “scale up a freakishly tall wall,” I mean, get about 5 1/2 feet up and demand to be lowered immediately, because your arms and legs are about to fall off from exhaustion.
My kids, on the other hand, have amazed me with their billy goat efforts to conquer certain routes.
7) Best Dry Shampoo Ever: listen, I’m not an expert in everything, but two things I know: chocolate chip cookies and dry shampoo. I’ve used about 384 brands of dry shampoo over the years, and this is the best stuff ever {aff. link}.
It’s pricier than other brands, but can you really put a price on being able to go a shocking number of days without washing your hair and not look like a greaseball? No, no you cannot. Also, I use less than other brands because it’s so effective.
8) Quick Thought: with the new year and a lot of focus on healthy eating, fitness goals, and new year’s resolutions, I’ve been reminded and have felt a lot of gratitude for how my perspective completely shifted when I read the book Intuitive Eating {aff. link} and started following Beauty Redefined (website/Instagram).
With absolutely no hyperbole, I can say that this book + account have been life changing for me as I work to develop body image resilience and teach my kids the same thing. At home, I only have to start saying “your body is…” before my kids start chiming in with “…an instrument not an ornament!”
I know this topic is akin to discussing politics: so.many.opinions, but I feel strongly about the ideas I’ve learned over the years.
Once I got mad (like, really mad) at diet culture and society’s irrational ideals and demands that women should not age (insert eye roll + throat punch), it helped free me from some of the confining thoughts I had been harboring about my body, nutrition, and a lot of other things…and I have been so, so much happier.
Let’s not be too hard on ourselves, ok?
Thanks for being here (and a special reward for those that made it to the end of this post!).
I’d love to hear YOUR thoughts – any and all of them!
I appreciate when you share the “real” in your lives. The good, the bad, the hard. I have learned so much from all of you over the years.
I personally struggle with many, many things (anxiety being high on that list). And even though, lucky for you, I don’t outline all the struggles here, just remember that daily life holds so much more than what we read on blog posts and view in little square snapshots on Instagram.
Sometimes, it’s just really helpful and validating to know we aren’t alone – in the good moments and the hard moments. Love your guts.
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I’ve tried several of your recipes in the past. Â All were well described and successful. I do want to say that I really love your writing style. How you describe and weave your recipe intro story is so delightful. Everytime I read it I laugh ,no, belly laugh. So often your stories resonate. You are a person I’d be friends with if we lived close.Â
I’m sure all your readers feel the same way.Â
P.S. Your Salsa recipe is the best. I can’t believe I actually made it. My family couldn’t get enough of it. It lasted all winter and the tomatoes came from our garden. Glorious! Â Thank you.Â
Blessings. C
Hi,
I just want to write to say thank you for the incredible recipes. I often come here for new ideas and I know whatever I make of yours will be loved by all.Â
I have made your recipes for grieving friends-the best pasta salad is a favorite-and I always make double so we can enjoy it as well.
I also want to share that I crocheted minimally about 20 years ago, and your Christmas post inspired me to pick it up again and I’m currently on blanket number 17. I have given them to my daughters (one graduated from high school this year and one from college) my husband, friends, and then made one for each of my daughter’s friends for graduation from high school gifts.
So, just wanted to say thank you for your inspiration and sharing your gifts. I am paying it forward and enjoying every minute. Â
pls do some more Friday Thoughts
luv them
Hi Mel,
I wanted to reach out to you to let you know what an inspiration you are to me!
I absolutely love all of your fantastic recipes and I share your website with many of my friends who ask for recipes when I’ve made and shared foods from your website.
I’m kind of old fashioned in that I don’t do Facebook or Instagram but I wanted to let you know how upset I am knowing people are making such rude and thoughtless comments to you about your recipes and other matters that you have been kind enough to share with us. My
Sister in law recently shared with me what you’ve been dealing with,
regarding thoughtless and cruel people who post rude comments and have left you broken emotionally.
I am forever grateful for all you have done….from great recipes to ingredient substitutions, to gift ideas, recipe tips and tricks, etc.
It takes a special person to do what you’ve accomplished and had to overcome….you are so talented and gifted!Â
Please know that I’m one of your biggest fans!
Patricia Pavelski
Stevens Point, WI
I have an afghan that is similar to the one mentioned. Â It was done with two strands of worsted weight yarn instead of chunky yarn and crocheted through both loops, not just the back loop. Â I made it when I was pregnant with my eldest daughter. Â She’s 40. Â The afghan is used daily. Â
Oh, man after 133 comments all you need is one more! Here it is. Our family did picture a Christmas one year. I have young married couples who don’t have two nickels to rub together because of school and well, being newlyweds. The last thing I wanted was for them to try to think of a meaningful gift that they could find for $10.
Thus, Picture a Christmas…..They needed to think of a gift that they would give that if money were not the object, but rather something that the other person would really like and they would enjoy giving. It was not an easy off the hook….they had to think about it and why and they had to find a picture and wrap it etc. We had more fun with this…. our Christmas lasted all morning as we laughed and enjoyed the “gifts” that were given. One of my daughters got married and had a bad hair experience. All she wanted was hair the color of Jennifer Anistons. Oh the tears that were shed when she ended up blond in August. Her brother remembered this and gave her a picture of Jennifer Aniston and recounted his view of her experience. Single 20 year old male right before leaving on his mission. We were very impressed he even got what happened and thought of this gift. I gave my husband a picture of a Ford truck and a 5th wheel trailer. I told him I could just imagine the adventures we would have. The idea of giving was there but no painful expenses. There you go. Thanks for letting me share.
Love ur friday thoughts
really cheer me up
pls do some more often
thanksss
Thanks so much for promoting intuitive eating and body resiliency (I like to use the term Body Neutrality). I started following Beauty Redefined a few years ago because I was really concerned about my girls growing up in this beauty-obsessed world. I just love what I have learned and continue to learn about this topic. It is so important to reject diet culture and get back to listening to our bodies. I am so glad that we can make healthy choices and still treat ourselves. It is so freeing! P.S. I love your recipes. I recently went camping with a friend and she premade a bunch of yummy stuff. I asked her where she got the ideas and she said that she was an avid follower of your blog. Neither one of us knew that the other followed you, too. It was a fun moment.
I love your thoughts on body image resilience! I started reading Intuitive Eating a couple weeks ago and really like it. I think I’ll check out Beauty Redefined account now, too. My biggest struggle right now is hair. I know a lot of wonderful women who have looking younger a priority by making sure their graying hair gets colored every few weeks, but I just don’t have it in me to add that to my list of things to keep on top of. So even though my son remind me this morning that while his hair is darkening, mine is getting whiter (he was exaggerating a bit- I’m in my mid 30’s. haha). I’m slowly realizing that even though women twice my age have not a single strand of gray hair and I find 13 new ones every morning, it really is ok. I’m trying to embrace the mindset that if I take care of my body I can age gracefully. So that’s my lifelong plan.Â
Also, go you for making blankets for your whole family! I had an idea a few years ago to crochet each of my family members a Christmas stocking and that has since been placed on the back burner. I need to improve my basic crocheting skills before I try to make beautiful, lasting Christmas stockings.Â
Mel, thanks for sharing! I love your Friday posts, as it gives mea glimpse into your normal family and personal life, not just your kitchen. I have incorporated several games from you over the years that our family loves. And my kids think you and I are best friends, even though we’ve never met. Love love love all the recipes! It makes my weekly planning so easy. You should open up with your anxiety, be more real about it. I personally don’t struggle with anxiety much, but I know several friends and a few sisters who really struggle. I’d love to know how better to help,support, and connect with them. And I think it would help them to know others are being open about it. It’s nothing to be ashamed about,-we all have our bucket of hard things. Thanks for being real on all you share.
Mel! Â I am so, so thrilled to see you purchased books from Eye See Me. It is my FAVORITE bookstore here in St. Louis and I am thankful you bought such important books from such an important business.Â
I’ve never commented before but I have to chime in with a huge AMEN to the thoughts on Intuitive Eating and Beauty Redefined. I found both a couple years back and immediately fell in love. Its been such an important paradigm shift for me to allow for gratitude for the incredible gift of my body and what it can do/has done, as well as helped me to move past the shame that I felt for having changed over the years. I feel like this perspective absolutely falls in line with what is more eternal in nature too.
Anyway, I totally get your anger, I was there for a while. Still feel angry occasionally when I see how diet culture affects those I love. But I wanted to say thanks for sharing and love your recipes!!
I decided to simplify my goals this year–traditionally I have made a long list, some I do some I don’t. This year I decided I want success in my goal setting.
My two goals this year are to get ice cream at Baskin Robbins at least quarterly. I also plan on stopping at the cupcake shop and getting a cupcake. Hubby and I share one, leaves you mostly satisfied. I think this needs to be a monthly goal. I also want to branch out on our eating out, aka drive thru or curbside. We are stuck on three or four favorites. Quarterly we need to branch our and go somewhere totally new to us. Now Mel, these are goals I can keep! Maybe we have just been making the wrong goals! Love your blog Mel. I purchase many of your gift recommendations. I like to hear your challenges in life, we can help each other. Sometimes its good to feel like maybe I’m not the only challenged parent, person. We can cheer each other on, you are doing better than you think you are. Love you much my virtual friend. If I lived by you I would be your real life friend, no doubt!
First of all those blankets!! Wow! I made no tie fleece blankets for my kids this year (2020 Christmas)They loved them! I just might have to try crocheting! When you said your trying not to control others emotions my ears perked up..I’m right with you! Early last year I signed up ($49 a month totally worth it) for a life coach. Jody Moore -Be Bold. She is an LDS life coach. Coaches on everything. She teaches and coaches on how to do many things..one of them being not controlling others and their emotions. For some reason “I’m convinced” at times that I actually have power to control others..doesn’t work so wellI love her! Check it out. http://www.jodymoore.com.Â
I really love and appreciate your Friday thoughts! And so good to hear that sometimes you lose the cool with your kids too. Again, right there with ya. Oh and New Years goals? Well, I take mine a day at a time. There’s too many goals I want to do better at, but then I get overwhelmed trying to decide which one to settle on. So I take it a day at a time. Like drink more water today!Â
Ps if you ever need books re-bound in a beautiful new genuine full grain leather or want a book restored to its former glory, my family owns a business that does these things! http://www.alpinecustombookbinding.com. We recently bound scriptures in a bright yellow for Al Carraway (tattooed Mormon) and Emily Bell freeman (light pink). Just a thought!
This is officially the longest comment ever. ❤️
We have a couple polish hens (and one of them has a male name – Hagrid- because the pictures we saw when we ordered her looked like big shaggy hair and beard!:) They are my favorite because they make me laugh with their crazy “hair!”
Klax is a new favorite game for us as well. Gotta love simple but fun games. (I have a hard time with games where the instructions come in book form).
Thank you for all the great recipes and for sharing your honest thoughts from time to time. I find it refreshing.
We will definitely need to check out Klask. All of your game recommendations are great, and tend to line up with our own family preferences. We got some fun new ones for Christmas (Dominion and Taco Cat Goat Cheese Pizza were a couple of favorites), but why do so many fun games only let you play with 4 people? Makes it hard for bigger-than-average-families like ours to get everyone in on the same game.
We have a homemade gift mandate too! Only we draw names and only have to do it for one person. I need to take your idea of requiring gifts to be better than popsicle stick grade. I’ve never thought to do that, but it would certainly improve the calibre of some kids’ creations!! But there have also been some real treasures and it’s a tradition that I love. Also, your blankets make me wish I had learned how to crochet. They look so great!
I love Beauty Redefined. I have a lot of beefs with the beauty industry and it drives me crazy that we as women are often the ones perpetuating the toxic culture that we’re trapped in. I’m looking forward to reading the new book. I’m not a big resolution maker either. Lately I’ve been trying to focus generally on healthy habits that are sustainable: listening to my hunger and fullness cues, eating well-balanced meals, moving my body regularly, getting enough sleep (<— that one's the hardest!).
Thanks for sharing your thoughts!
Hi Mel! Thank you for the post 🙂 I can’t agree more with the positive body image quote. I wanted to share a quote that helped me this Christmas with a positive body image for myself. The quote is from the 1994 movie “Little Women”, where Jo, the oldest shares her desire to be admired and feel beautiful to others and her wise Marmie answers with… “I only care what you think of yourself, if you feel your value lies in being merely decorative, I fear that someday you might find yourself believing that’s all that you really are. Time erodes all such beauty but what it cannot diminish is the wonderful workings of your mind, your humor, your kindness, and your moral courage.”
I hope that speaks to you even personally Mel!
Blessings;
Lucy.
I love this quote from Little Women so much. Â It speaks volumes.!!! Thank you so much for sharing. Â As a 70 year old woman, I know those words are true. Â I wish it was not so difficult to convey to our youth-oriented society what really is most important in life. Â I still care about my looks, but my faith, family, friends, health, and knowledge sure takes priority. Â My body truly is an instrument. Â I am amazed and thankful everyday about what this 70 year old body can still do.
Love you Mel! Thanks for taking the time to share your thoughts and ideas with us!
Thank you, Camille!
I’ve been a silent but faithful follower for a really long time… like I don’t even know how long. I use your recipes almost exclusively. But today I feel the need to respond to this post. Thank you for using your platform to talk about Intuitive Eating and Beauty Redefined. I’m a health coach and Intuitive Eating certified counselor and any increased awareness is awesome! I love what you said and frankly you have been so easy to follow for years because of your balanced approach to food and enjoying it. You’re great!!!Â
Thanks for the comment, Brooke! I’ve wanted to bring it up and talk about it for a while, and felt like now was a good time. I love that you are an IE certified counselor – that’s amazing!! There’s so much more I need to learn, but it has been empowering.
Thank you for all you share… your thoughts, your experiences, your recipes. They all make a difference in your readers’ lives. Everybody in my house knows who Mel is now. It’s like you’re a family friend that we haven’t met yet. Thanks for being that kind of person!Â
Millie! Thank you so much. That was the sweetest comment and something that really lifted my spirits today. Thank you!
One of the (many) reasons I keep coming back here for over 10 years now is for both your balanced approached to meals and your balanced way of thinking. It is refreshing and encouraging visiting here knowing a diet or exercise plan won’t be pushed or foods won’t be labeled as “good” or “bad”.  I’m so thankful for voices like yours in the food world that are healing, real, gentle, and sustainable.Â
I learned about the book “Intuitive Eating” as a 15 year old while my sister was in a eating disorder treatment center.  It helped me start to recognize and reject so many prevalent and dangerous views about body image and dieting. The truths I learned at 15 in that book have blessed me since then.Â
Beauty Redefined I heard about later as a new mom and it was perfect timing to remind me at that vulnerable postpartum place the truths about our bodies and using them as instruments and not ornaments. I am so grateful to see you are sharing these amazing resources!  Reading your post today reminded me that I can be more intentionally teaching these truths to my kids! I love that they can complete the instrument not ornament phrase!  Thank you for sharing and for your courage to be real about life and it’s inherit struggles  <3
Thank you for your thoughtful comment, Rachel! I think part of what you said struck me – that it’s never too early to learn of these empowering truths about body image and eating (and never too early to start teaching them to our kids). I have a lot to learn, but it’s something I feel strongly about and am grateful so many others do, too. Thanks, Rachel!