Friday Thoughts
It’s been a while, but I’m pretty excited to be popping back in with a Friday Thoughts post (they’re my favorite because of YOUR comments). I have a lot on my mind. Like, a lot, a lot.
And I’m excited to get your feedback and thoughts on all my rambly venting today. 🙂
All the other past Friday Thoughts posts here.
1) Family Vacation: I need your help! This resident homebody needs to know: what is the best family vacation you’ve ever taken? To where? And why? (I’m gathering some highly scientific data to present to Brian next week, so thanks in advance.)
2) Sunday Dinner Assignments: Last fall I realized weeknights were not working when it came to teaching my kids how to cook. Too busy. Too noisy. Too distracting. Too stressful. Too much controlling OCD (ahem, taking full ownership for that one).
So we switched the system up a bit, and I can’t believe how well it is working. I love it! The kids love it! And honestly, they have totally shocked me and Brian with their rock star cooking abilities.
I call it Sunday Dinner Assignments. Super clever and catchy, huh? Gosh, I’m a marketing wizard.
How it’s working so far: I plan out a simple menu for Sunday night and assign one of the kids for each section. This involves a super high tech system of writing the menu on a post it note with one of the kid’s names next to each section.
Usually it’s a main dish, homemade bread or rolls of some sort, a side dish or two, and dessert. And in most cases, I let them choose the specific recipe they want to make (within reason and with approval).
I don’t put myself on the rotation. The kids execute the whole meal AND they are responsible for washing the dishes for their recipe. My role is to not helicopter and just answer questions and step in if they ask for help.
Yes, it’s a bit chaotic and messy; they try and work together to plan out oven usage and stagger the prep/cooking times so there are only a couple of them in the kitchen at a time.
The best part is seeing how excited they are to tell Brian which dish they made when we sit down to dinner. Of course we have had quite a few spills (including a whole bucket of honey) and arguments about who gets to use the favorite whisk first (that one ended in tears + at least one bruise)…and there have even been a few times where something was…um…slightly inedible.
But the learning process has been invaluable. Each one of the boys has made homemade rolls (or this buttery bundt bread is a fave choice) at least twice by themselves, and let me tell you, if they do nothing else in their lives, I’m going to hang on to some mom pride over this accomplishment.
They are all used to the system now and ask me on Saturday night if I know what their assignment will be yet. I’m sure this Sunday Dinner Assignments thing will go through several variations as we stick with it, but it’s working pretty great right now.
In the interest of full disclosure, about every fourth or fifth Sunday, I have a little “moment” and decide I can’t handle anyone else being in the kitchen and declare it “Mom’s Sunday Dinner Assignment All By Herself Please Leave the Kitchen Area Immediately.”
How do you teach the kids in your life to cook? Are you able to let go of the control and give them free reign?
3) Eagle Scouts:Both Walker and Jackson earned their Eagle Scout award a couple Sundays ago (with three other young men from church). Scouting has been a fun journey for them, even if they didn’t love every single minute.
Quite honestly, toward the end, I didn’t know if our relationship would survive the paperwork process, but I’m really, really proud of them for achieving this award. And I’m really, really proud of myself for making it through, too. Haha. No, but seriously.
At the ceremony, my 15-year old chose to give his mentor pin to me, which was so touching and sweet! The scoutmaster handed him the microphone so he could say a few words about why he was doing this, and Jackson cleared his throat and very meaningfully gave this tender tribute: “well, I’m giving this mentor pin to my mom because she basically threatened me that I couldn’t get my driver’s license until my Eagle Scout was done. And also, she drove me around to a lot of places.”
And you know what? I totally gave him a huge hug and kiss on the cheek because I’LL TAKE IT. The tribute and the mentor pin. 🙂 I love these boys and am really, really proud of their hard work, including learning the art of making real, live phone calls, which apparently might be the hardest, hardest, hardest thing to ask a teenager to do.
4) Natural Deoderant:ok, you guys, I’ve tried a lot of natural deoderant out there, and I’m sorry for the inclusion of too much info here, but I’ve done so even at the cost of some serious underarm chafing and rashes (Schmidt’s, I’m looking at you). Lume, Tom’s, Schmidt’s. I still feel like I smell like a pre-pubescent middle school boy.
Help? Am I missing something? Is there a natural deoderant that actually works and doesn’t rip up my skin? Please enlighten me and the rest of humanity.
5) Being a Finisher: I’ve been working on teaching my kids the art of being a finisher. And instead of lecturing, I decided I better just model the desired behavior and actually finish a couple projects I’ve been working on for years.
I started this crochet quilt when Camryn was a toddler. Yes, that’s 5+ years ago. And I just barely finished it over the holiday break. And then I wrapped it up and put it under the Christmas tree as a present to myself. I’m embarrassed to say I actually cried tears when it was done.
It’s been a labor of love. And now I’m afraid to actually ever use it because what if it unravels? (Free pattern from Purl Soho and yarn from Knitpicks, which was enough yarn for my mom to also make one of these blankets, which she finished years before mine – she’s a rock star)
The other blanket I finally finished was this Fancy Forest quilt, pattern by Elizabeth Hartman. A couple years ago when I decided I wanted to learn to quilt (never had before), I chose this as my first quilt. Yes, you just go ahead and laugh at me, because everyone else in my real life did, too!
I admit it was a bit ambitious, but I figured if I was going to learn, I was going to learn. Anyway, you can see how well that worked out. It took me, again, about five years to finish this quilt. And there are so many mistakes I can hardly bear to look at it. (Sidenote: not sure quilting is the right hobby for someone with a brain like mine.) But I finished it! It’s legit the hardest project I’ve ever done.
And I am really, really proud of myself. I even took a long arm quilting class at a local quilt shop and long arm quilted the top of this bad boy all by myself, and I HAVE NEVER BEEN MORE SCARED AND MORE PROUD OF ANYTHING I’VE DONE IN MY WHOLE LIFE EVER. Also, I sweated an obscene amount during the long arm process. Also, this may be why we need to really delve into topic #4 up there. Also, I promise to never talk about sweat again.
Do you have any goals to finally finish something this year that you started long ago?
6) Vegan, Vegan:A good friend of mine is transitioning to a plant-based/vegan/no sugar diet to combat a stage IV cancer diagnosis. We basically talk about the food part of this journey nonstop, and my brain is going a mile a minute to figure out how to help her (and also incorporate more plant-based recipes in my own life)!
She and I have already been experimenting with different cashew-based dressings and sauces among other things. We’ve had some wins. And some losses. Haha. Do you have any great vegan/100% unprocessed recipes to share? Favorite online sources? Cookbooks?
7) Grit and Resilience: this TED talk is really fascinating. I really, really want my kids to be gritty! And let’s be honest, I want it for myself, too. To persevere through hard things and not give up. Since I’m 1,000% certain lecturing does.not.help. I’m trying to find more ways to help foster resilience in my kids. Any experts out there on growth mindset? Have I gone too far? Is this too deep for a Friday? What are your thoughts?
8) Games:You know I can only go so long without talking about what games we are loving at the minute. One of you awesome persons recommended the game Patchwork – aff. link on my holiday game gift guide. We love it! It’s a 2-person game and it is so, so fun. You don’t have to be interested in sewing or quilting or buttons or anything to love this game. It’s super strategic with a little bit of luck, and I can’t recommend it highly enough.
The other game we’ve been pulling out for a quick game sesh is Left, Center, Right (we have the basic version and also the wild version – aff. links). Super, super fast. Super, super fun. Everyone around here loves LCR!
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Ok, you guys, thanks for sticking with me through this rambling post!
Love your guts.
Don’t leave until you add your thoughts below. I need your insights, humor, wisdom and recipes in my life. 🙂
UPDATE!!!! You guys. YOU GUYS! I have spent hours (days!) reading through your comments. I’ve read every single one. I wish I had time to respond to you each personally. Instead, I literally just made a MASSIVE spreadsheet (ahem, nerd alert) with all of your vacation, deodorant, vegan and grit recommendations. And you guys, this spreadsheet is gold. I can’t wait to organize it (ahem, second nerd alert) and read through it and learn from it and PLAN A VACATION and make some plant-based meals and try out the 5,000 deodorant recommendations all while telling my kids to stay gritty. Haha. But seriously, I could kiss all of your faces for all of the comments. The insights. The personal stories and experiences. As always, you’ve made me laugh and think and think some more. And you have given so, so many good recommendations. WHAT WOULD I DO WITHOUT YOU? No really, what would I do? I’d actually have to find friends in real life and that would just be super lame. So glad you guys are my people. I loved reading every single one of these comments. I promise to update a future Friday Thoughts post (or maybe just at the bottom of this one) with my spreadsheet findings! xoxo
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I have to compliment you on your really fine, good looking boys. My goodness. Every one is a dead ringer for his Daddy. I’ve been binge reading your posts the last couple of days and it is just amazing how boys seem to reach a point where they begin to seem less like children and begin to be MEN. Maybe we better start planning the weddings? Your little girl is sure growing up too. Not a baby anymore! So sweet. You ALL seem like such a lovely family.
https://www.feastingathome.com
Sylvia has an amazing web-site with seasonal recipes that can be easily switched up from vegan, vegetarian or meat based. You can also sign up for monthly emails based on seasonal recipes of each month.. It all tastes fabulous and it’s easy. Also, she experiments with spices and cuisines from around the world. So there is lots of variety. Worth a try.
Congratulations to your Eagle Scouts! That is a fantastic accomplishment! My husband just celebrated his 31st anniversary of his Eagle Scout and my oldest son is almost there. Have to get that darn paper work done and submitted! Congratulations to you and your husband too. It’s a lot of work being scout parents and keeping the boys going. My husband and youngest just left for a chili cook-off campout. Thank you for always providing such wonderful and tasty recipes! You are a blessing!
Best Family vacation: Costa Rica.  It’s not cheep or expensive, but the whole family loved it.  Moneys, zip lining, adventure.  My youngest was 7 and she could do everything. Â
Hi Mel,
I’ve been a fan of your blog for years. Â Thank you for all of your hard work and energy in continually creating great content! Â
I have two teenagers (Daughter & Son) who are so much fun.  Our whole family loves this growth mindset site https://thelearnerlab.com.  It’s creator is passionate about this topic and youthful, so it’s really fun and teen focused. Â
Thank you!
Your quilt turned out beautiful Mel!! You’ve inspired me to pull out some of my started and not finished sewing projects!Â
Okay I’m late to this post too but I have to put in a few plugs for vacations. We did go to Disney Alauni 2 summers ago with my entire family of 22 for my moms 60th bday. It was a memory of a lifetime and so perfect for the grandkids (my 12 year old was the oldest) with all the Disney characters and all that. But there were couples there with no kids that were also having the times of their lives so maybe age doesn’t matter when Disney is involved. The characters can be seen and met all over the property, they have a character breakfast, and super fun slide and lazy river and pool parties with Goofy. Amazing.Â
That being said, last summer the weekend before school started we took our family to the Hiawatha Trail. I’m sure you’ve heard of it or maybe done it before, but it’s on the border of Montana and Idaho. We had all 6 of our bikes and camp gear. We camped 2 nights right in the forest near the trailhead and then after we did the trail spent the day exploring Missoula and stayed a night at a hotel there. This was actually my favorite family trip even over Hawaii. I was in the back and we cruised the bike trail at a slow pace just soaking it all in.  I was just in awe of the beauty around me, my family in front of me included and I have never felt so blessed. Truly. It was one of those memories I will keep in my mind and my heart forever. Our son Jay who complains to do anything active, and 6 at the time had the time of his life. When we mentioned he hadn’t complained all day (took us 4 hours to do the 15 mile trail) he said “I just couldn’t! It was too much fun! I couldn’t even complain!” Haha. Anyways it’s 15 mile low downgrade going through train tunnels and trusses. One tunnel is even over a mile long. They have a website and I apologize if you’ve already done this since you are so close. But it was my FAVORITE. One tip though is to go early in the morning right when it opens. It’s a shared road so as the day goes on you will have to share the road and it takes away the awe-ness of nature. We never saw any cars but on the shuttle back dusted out quite a few riders that were just starting. Lol. And LASTLY Oregon Coast is probably my third favorite trip we’ve taken
I’ve tried a bunch of different deodorants and my favourite is Undercarriage https://undercarriagedeodorant.com/. A jar will last 4 to 6 months.
Our favourite family vacation was renting a cottage on a lake. So relaxing!
That is a beautiful quilt!!! Just gorgeous!
Congratulations to your Eagle Scouts. Great accomplishment! Your kids are all adorable.
My hubby has reactions to deodorant. He tried about a dozen different ones and they all caused a rash. We finally tried Weleda and it’s been working now for almost a year with NO rash or problems. He uses the roll on.
Thanks for all of your delicious recipes. Your crockpot beef stew is the only beef stew recipe I make. Love it!!
I am so late to this post, but love your site and your Friday thoughts. I am also trying to figure out how to teach grit to my kids and realized it has to be hard work. We love vacations, so we told our kids they have to earn money for a Disney vacation  a year from now. I have 5 and the oldest is 11, so we will see how it goes, but we just wanted to make them sweat a little and then (hopefully) appreciate it more!Â
As far as places – we love Black Hills National park (Mt Rushmore), Victoria, BC and the Oregon Coast (we actually bought a vacation rental there last year, so we visit often). Â This summer, we are renting an RV for the first time to drive from Seattle to Yosemite and so I love the comments about RVs. Hoping to make some memories!Â
Thanks for all the recipes and for staying real and humble! Â
My daughter and husband decided to go vegan in college, so I’ve been on this journey myself. One recipe we all love is a raw fruit dip made with cashews that I served at her bridal shower. It is especially tasty with sliced bananas, strawberries, Nilla Wafers, and pretzel crisps. No soaking required! 1 1/2 cups cashews, 1/2 cup water, 3 tablespoons coconut oil, 2 tablespoons agave nectar or honey, 1 tablespoon pure vanilla extract, 1/4 teaspoon sea salt plus more to taste. Blend all ingredients in a high speed blender until smooth and very creamy. Taste and adjust sweetness if necessary. Chill in the fridge for a couple hours; it firms up nicely. Enjoy!
You’re probably done reading these, but the very best vacation we’ve ever had was in Outer Banks, NC. Excellent!!! We took our 5 kids, ages 9 to 21, and everyone loved it! We still talk about it all the time. Rented a house right on the beach, 5 stories high with a captain’s turret where the dining room table was, built in swimming pool, basketball and volleyball courts, bikes, arcade in the basement, decks all around the entire house, a bedroom and bath for each kid. It was amazing, and incredibly reasonable (we do NOT have a lot of money) especially because we grabbed it the last week of the ‘off season’, which was the last week of April. There are tons of beach houses for rent, quite reasonable and loaded with fun perks. It’s a beautiful place.
Reading through all of these comments because I have to give my mind a break from reading anymore about Covid-19. I want to get more information about the details of the house your reader rented in the Outer Banks. Is there anyway to do that? It would be great to plan a fun vacation for next year.Â
You’re probably done reading these comments – I’m a little late to the party. But, let me tell you, that I love to see you “making” your kids learn to cook. I love to cook and I mean I LOVE IT but when it came to teaching my 2 girls to cook, they would have nothing to do with it. ACK! I was so disappointed because I think cooking is a life skill. Both of them are fortunate now to have husbands that cook but it still is a thing they don’t like and won’t do. Boo!
P.S. Sorry for the vent. I know you’re not the resident therapist. 🙂
Deodorant:  Same problem here.  I actually STOPPED using deodorant altogether…..the first few days were rough but I just made sure to wash morning and evening.  Then once my pores cleared, NO body odor.  NONE.  The only time I might notice it is around my period, in which case I wash more frequently.  I still use my rose and vanilla deodorant on occasion when I’m very nervous or when I exercise heavily, but even then it’s not really necessary.  Try it, you have nothing to lose! Â
One of our favorite vacation destinations has always been Vancouver Island B.C. Canada. We drive from Idaho and take a ferry from Vancouver to Nanaimo. We like to stay in Parksville on the coast so that when the tide goes out it is a treasure trove of tide pools and sand dollars. We also spend some time in Victoria, and MacMillan Provincial Park walking through the giant redwood forest. Love, love, love it there.
LOVE your blanket and quilt! Way to go!! I have lots of sewing projects I’d love to tackle, especially a quilt I’ve been wanting to finish, but yeah, probably will wait for my baby to get a bit bigger. I am taking a really cool sewing class with my 8 year old daughter and it has been such a blast.
Deodorant – Native or Herban Cowboy have worked for me.
Family Vacation – Oregon Coast, Couer D’alene Idaho, anywhere in the mountains, have been nice for us.
Vegan – I don’t know much, but I tried to go plant based while nursing and it was super hard. If I try again I will watch that I’m getting more B-12 (nutritional yeast on popcorn I hear is one way…???)
Hurray for the Eagle Scouts and the Sunday cooking assignments. I might try that. My 10 year old “made” dinner tonight, but it was mostly me it turned out.
I’m trying to declutter lots of stuff in my house and recipes was today! So I’m making a binder of stuff we make again and again and it’s mostly recipes from you. So thank you!! 🙂
I make my own deodorant and have for a few years. Coconut oil is the base. Good recipes online, mine is in a ‘good’ spot (drawer with gazillion other recipes or I would share). Essential oils added.
First, congrats on your Eagle Scouts!! Â This is a HUGE accomplishment and family commitment! Â My son also wasn’t allowed to become a driver without becoming Eagle and also timed his Eagle ceremony around Nutcracker for relatives to see his sister’s solo! Â A family accomplishment for sure – and as my brother (who is an Eagle too) points out is the first real thing to put on their resume and at 50, the first thing people comment on his resume!
Anyway, vacation!! Â We love and look forward to planning vacations!! Â We have had a goal of going to each state. Â I know you have moved a lot – so you may be on your way. Â Some years we have followed the Oregon Trail, some years gone to New England, went to see the Liberty Bell and Statue or Liberty, some gone on a road trip with our kids (we only have 2) picking a national park they wanted to go to. Â We have loved every trip!! Â Enjoy your time with your family wherever you decide!!
No Pong deodorant (ships from Australia) is the only one I found to work. You do have tp rub it in yourself as it comes as a paste in a round tin. One tin lasts about a mo.
I see you got a few comments about Native deodorant. It is the only natural kind that has worked for me, IF I make sure I wash my armpits the night before. That has been key information which they state in their little write up about the product.