Friday Thoughts: Surviving Summer
Well, hello there! Even though it’s only mid-July, it’s hard to believe that summer break is more than half over for us.
It’s been a summer of ups and downs. Lots of fun, lots of challenges. Some wonderful memories made and some disappointments here and there. Just life, you know? But overall, I think we can all say it’s been a pretty good one.
This Friday Thoughts post is kind of long. It’s random. It’s a little weird. It makes me feel slightly vulnerable in parts. But it’s all real life stuff! I don’t blame you if you don’t read it all. Clearly I just needed to get a lot of stuff out of my brain and into this space, so no worries if you give up after the first paragraph. If you make it to the end, you deserve a super rock star award.
As I say with each of these posts, what I really want is to hear from you! Let me know how your summer is going, and weigh in on anything and everything below! It’s a highlight for me when I read all of your comments.
You can catch all Friday Thoughts posts here (some of the best discussion and information in the comment threads of these posts).
1) Card Game Obsession: In between the massive amounts of outdoor projects and yard work we have done and have yet to do, we’ve found our new game obsession. Oh man. This simple card game is SO fun. I bought it after one of you recommended it in one of my last game posts, and we’ve already introduced it to so many friends and family (who have instantly fell in love and bought it too). It’s called Play Nine {aff. link}. It looks like a game all about golf (which actually kind of turned me off initially, no offense golf people), but other than trying to get a low score, it’s not really anything like golf. Highly, highly recommend this, especially since it can be played with as few as two people or as many as six people, and it is super easy to catch on. Yep, we’re obsessed.
2) Craziest Cookie of My Life: I posted this pic on Instagram last week asking for help thinking of what to call these cookies. Seriously, you guys, they are insane. So, so delicious. I’ve made probably six or seven batches of them in the last two weeks (notably, I just made 150 of them for my cousins’ wedding dinner yesterday). I received over 400 messages on Instagram (!!) with name suggestions, and all I can say is: you guys crack me up. I’ll be posting the recipe next week, and I’ll definitely be highlighting the winning name as well as some of the others that are too good not to share. Any last thoughts? What do you think this cookie should be called??
3) Cookie Dough Business: Speaking of cookies, my older three kids are busy earning money for a church trek/camp coming up, as well as a family trip we have set for next spring break (each of them are earning several hundred dollars toward the cost of the trip). My older two boys have “official” jobs (one working hard at a horse ranch and the other doing upkeep/yard work/fix it projects on our rental property and 20 acres behind us). That leaves my sweet 12-year old who decided he wanted to sell cookie dough. He put together this flier and got to work!
He literally spent three full days in the kitchen making cookie dough and freezing it in preparation for sales. He’s done his best to get the word out to neighbors and friends in the area and so far he’s sold almost 20 dozen cookie dough balls! Proud of him and all his hard work as he has tackled this largely on his own (he’s an amazing chef/baker so it was a natural business choice). We do need to work a bit on degreasing the kitchen floor and “cleaning as you go” but overall, it’s been fun to see him work on this.
4) Family Reunion Recap: Brian and I planned his extended family reunion this year. The planning consumed my every waking moment for a long time, and I was equal parts relieved and sad when it was over. His family of 48 prefers to stay under the same roof for reunions, which is awesome but poses challenges finding a space for that large group.
This year after asking on Instagram for your recommendations, we stumbled on Three Peaks Lodge in St. Anthony, Idaho, and wow. Wow! It was amazing and probably the most perfect reunion location we could have asked for (totally unsponsored). We loved it so much, in fact, that his family has already booked it for the 2021 reunion. The kitchen is ginormous (seats 40+ people!), there are rock walls and slides and hidden tunnels all throughout the lodge, and outside there are basketball courts, tennis courts, picnic tables, a hot tub, tons of grassy/playing areas. Ten bedrooms, six bathrooms and a huge bunkroom. Honestly, it was perfect.
Brian and I basically packed up our entire house and brought it with us. Ha. Among all the kitchen and planning items, we brought our nine square game that our friends made for us, which was a total hit and occupied kids and adults alike for hours (along with tons of other outside games like spikeball, flimsee, Kub and others).
One of the highlights that I didn’t expect was this baby faces game. I printed out 5X7 pictures of every family member as a baby and put them on a wall (each picture had a # on it). The “scorecard” sheets had all the names…whoever matched the most correct #’s to names won the grand prize (a set of teething rings and a Baby Ruth candy bar :). I couldn’t believe how competitive Brian’s family was about trying to get the most right! I think his dad and older brother sat in front of this wall for at least four hours. It was hilarious.
Brian planned some epic family Olympic games involving everyone from the babies to the great grandmas. Super fun. Yes, those are ding dongs getting stacked on Jackson’s forehead. 🙂
And this bobblehead skit some of the grandkids did was hilariously awesome (faces of grandma, grandpa and the two great grandmas). I printed the high res photos at Costco (16X20) and glued them to foam board, cut them out, and glued a sturdy plastic cup to the back which the kids gripped in their little teeth. If this whole setup has you slightly concerned and freaked out, just google “bobblehead skit” and you’ll see how hilarious they are.
Mostly we did a lot of talking, laughing, game playing (inside and out), and of course, eating. I made this honey lime chicken and this lentil chili and served it as a build-your-own nacho bar with tortilla chips and tons of toppings. For a breakfast, I made this chocolate granola and this almond granola and served it with yogurt and lots of fresh fruit (and scrambled eggs and toast). Yum! His siblings brought some stellar meals, too. We definitely didn’t go hungry!
5) Quilting: Where are all my quilters at? I posted this on Instagram a few weeks ago, but I finished this flag quilt (pattern by Camille at Thimble Blossoms) just in time for the 4th of July. And even though I tend to say a lot of bad words when I sew anything, and I’ve never met a hobby that frustrates me quite as much as quilting, weirdly, I actually really enjoy it, too. I was visiting my mom when I finished this quilt – she took me to her local quilt store and taught me how to long arm quilt the top. I was a super nervous wreck (not the greatest hobby for perfectionists), but in the end, I’ll give it to my mom for pushing me out of my comfort zone and making me finish this 100% by myself. Geez. Why do moms always have to be right??
6) Pickleball: We are very, very recent pickleball converts (my brother taught us to play a few weeks ago when we were visiting in Montana), and oh my gosh, how come no one told us how fun this game is?? We quickly bought some paddles online {aff. link} and it has been a blast for our whole family. A few tears, but not too many. Our tiny little community doesn’t have official pickleball courts, but we have tennis courts that can be *pretty* easily modified and there are some public park pickleball courts 25-ish minutes away. I am the least athletic person alive, and I’m still halfway decent (haha, not great but decent). Am I the last one on earth to play this??
7) Fill in the Blank: I’ve been thinking a lot about boundaries lately. I’m not good at them. I never have been, really. But I’ve been trying to establish better boundaries in many areas of my life. Boundaries for things I do personally (blogging/social media) and also boundaries involving people in my life (for instance, trying to learn how to stop managing the emotions of those around me). Much of this initiative is to lessen some anxieties that I deal with on the daily. It’s not something I talk a lot about because it reveals some of my insecurities, and it’s probably a bit too deep to dive into fully here (we can pick it up in the comment thread, if you’d like), but mostly today, I’d love if you could fill in the blanks in this sentence for me. No judging! Any answer is safe here – be it deep, a little out there, hilarious, real, sensitive, whatever.”I want to do more _____________ and less _____________”
My responses today would be:
I want to do more being true to myself and less worrying about making others upset.
Or maybe: I want to do more reading in the New Testament and less scrolling through Instagram.
Or lastly: I want to do more cookie eating and less cookie baking. Def going to need to get my kids involved in this last one! 🙂
If you feel comfortable, I’d love to know what your response to that sentence would be!
Love you guys. Thanks for being here.
Friday Thoughts Update: By popular demand, I’m recapping a few hot topics from the last Friday Thoughts post. Namely, what do you use for photo storage and what is your signature recipe? First up, photo storage. I went through each and every comment and kind of compiled a quick and casual list of how you guys reported you handle your personal photo storage. The highest number of comments talked about their experience with Google Drive and Google Photos (the latter syncs to your computer and an external hard drive). Lots of other responses included: Amazon Prime, wd.com, backblaze, forever.com, carbonite, and good old-fashioned hard drives.
Signature recipes! It was impossible to categorize all of these responses, but I loved reading the recipes you are known for! Loved it, loved it. Everything from cinnamon rolls to chickpea curry to chocolate chip cookies to almond puff. The answers are golden and now I want all the recipes.
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291 Comments on “Friday Thoughts: Surviving Summer”
Hi there, Mel!
I’ve been looking back through your older posts that mention your son’s cookie business because I have an 8-year-old girl who wants to try her hand at a bake sale business. I was hoping to glean some tips or advice from your experience. I have loved following your family life and recipes for a few years 🙂
So, if you (or fellow moms) see this and have any resources or advice about getting started, I would greatly appreciate them.
PS – We live in Colorado, so promise not to steal your customers!
I don’t know that I have a ton of advice, but here’s how my son has done it. He made a flier on the computer that advertised the four flavors of cookies he offers (it’s changed summer to summer, but I think he’s pretty much settled on soft and chewy chocolate chip, smore’s chocolate chip, snickderdoodle, and fudgy brownie…and then he also offers a gluten free chocolate chip on special request). He charges $5/dozen. He spends several days making several batches of each. He makes the dough, rolls into balls, freezes on a cookie sheet and then pops 12 cookie dough balls into ziploc bags and puts them in the freezer (he writes the flavor of cookie on the bag in sharpie). Hope that helps a little!
I would do more living in abundance and less living in scarcity.
I would do more self care and less spreading myself thin.
Can I ask how much it cost to make the 9 square game? My husband is pretty handy and I think could make it..m but I know pvc can get a little pricey if you’re buying a lot! We have a reunion coming up though and I feel like it would be super fun 🙂
Could you share the link to your Instagram post with family reunion locations? I tried looking through and couldn’t find it, but would love to see what other places were recommended!
Also, almost goes without saying, but I am a huge fan. Love cooking your recipes!!
Hey McKenna – I don’t have a link because all the suggestions were sent via DMs on Instagram, but I’ll try to compile a list!
I just sent my oldest three kids to school and with that in mind I want to do more listening to my children and less talking at them. Getting ready for school to start this year was absolute insanity and I found myself just wanting to take a deep breath and let go—but I just couldn’t do it. So the first day of school is my new beginning too.
Enjoy the back to school detox, Emma!
As a quilter, I enjoyed seeing your project. I also teach quilting, and always tell my students that finished is better than perfect.
Great advice for me – thank you, Mary!
I know I’m super late in posting my response. I was lost in my own family reunion and kind of unplugged, so just catching up. I wish I could do more living and more sleeping. I know that sounds weird, but do you ever feel like you just start getting into your groove around 11:00 or 11:30 at night after your kids are in bed? I feel like there just aren’t enough minutes in the day somehow. No really, though. I wish I could play more with my kids and less worrying about my to do list. There is a little more vulnerability. Thanks for the introspection of this question. You’re the greatest.
Oh my gosh, that is the story of my life, Jennifer. I give a huge amen to everything you said!
You’re incredible Melanie! I use many
of your recipes and we love them. I loved reading about your Reunion etc. We usually have a three day reunion but this year we had a great one day reunion in Ruper, ID with 202 attending out of nearly 600 of my parents family. Many live out of the country and out of the western states so that was pretty good for the first time doing ‘just fun at the park’. Thanks for your inspiration (studying the New Testament), thoughts and kindness from your family!
Love ya, Carol!
I know you’ve already named your cookie now but you’ll prob want to change it after I tell you my sisters’ ideas…car seat crumb cookies or couch cushion cookies
I’m with you on the New Testament. I need to recommit. Thank you for your post.
Haha, those are great names. 🙂
Pickleball is the best!! I’m in St. George and it is growing so fast here! Glad you discovered how fun it is!
And thanks for your suggestion to think about what we want to change in our lives. Right now I’d say I want to do more playing with my kids and less spending time on projects that are supposed to be for them but are taking away from my time with them.
I’ve heard pickleball is really huge in St. George! That’s so fun. I loved your fill in the blank response. It’s so easy to get distracted by those “things” which seem to be beneficial but are actually taking away from the whole point of the matter (kids, in this case). Thanks for sharing that.
I love your posts. For years now (probably 8 years now!) I have loved your blog. Thank you!!
I don’t know that it is always “doing” more – I think it is being more that matters – for me anyway.
I want to be more focused on what really matters, and less easily overwhelmed.
Thank you, Trish!
I love your game suggestions! Some of our most favorite family games have come from your recommendations over the years. Also, I can’t wait for the cookie recipe. Cookies are my most favorite treat!
Thank you, Jen! Hoping to post that bad boy cookie recipe tonight!
I love this post! Do you happen to have a link for the instructions on how to make the 9-square game? I would love to make one for my family!
Hi Katie, a friend of ours made that game for us, but I know there are a lot of tutorials online if you google “homemade 9 square in the air game” – it’s so much fun!
Oh, the cookie. I’d call them Play Nine Cookies. You can remember this summer forever!
Haha, true!
your machine quilting is huge. i once machine quilted one of mine and swore i’d never do it again. ha. i will use my own small machine for a small and simple quilt but the long arm was insanity. i’m sure it’s just a matter of practice. your quilt is amazing. every fourth of july, i wish i had a great flag quilt. love your reunion recap too. i’m always interested in that! sounds like a huge success. the cookies look insane. i need to make them.
i want to do more trusting that things will work out and less worrying.
Thanks for the comment, Karen! The quilt almost put me over the edge (long arm quilting the top)…I have an even bigger one to tackle next. Yikes!
That quilt is absolutely beautiful! I’ve always wanted to learn how to quilt. Maybe one of these days I’ll take a class. As far as your question:
I want to live more joyfully and complain less.
I want to learn to trust God more and worry less.
Thank you, Karlie!
After baby #5 was born quilting became my creative outlet. Something I could do during nap time to help save my sanity;) since having baby #6 finding time has become more difficult but I refuse to let it go:) I have had to let go of some perfectionism tendencies but I love the whole creative process! Lately I have been doing more potholders and table runners (same process just faster start to finish). I look forward to seeing what you make in the future!
Something fun I have done for my kids is a name quilt with fabric that fits their personality. They are relatively quick and easy and my kids love them!
Good for you for hanging on to the hobby with both hands! Even if it slows down a little, I love that you are still trying to find bits and pieces of time – smaller projects sounds like a smart idea!
I just love how real and open you are. I struggle a lot with the same things you have mentioned. I often let what others are doing affect me and I doubt myself a lot. I was sad to see your post end! It has so much great stuff in it. My hubby plays pickle ball with the guys from work and keep waiting for him to teach us! Maybe I’ll just have to buy some paddles and google how to play! Haha! Your site is the first one I go to for recipes on anything. Just love it and and think your pretty darn great!
Thank you so much, Keri! I’m actually pretty convinced I’m going to try and paint a pickleball court on our driveway. I mean, why not?? 🙂
Sounds like your summer is amazing so far. I would love a write up of the games you did for the family Olympics. We do something similar each year on a big friend camping trip and I’m always on the lookout for the ideas that work!
Yes, me too! I love idea sharing. I’ll try to get them all written down in one place.
Mel, thank you for a great post. Your new cookie creation sounds like a happy Trailblazing or Chunk full of goodness cookie. Whatever name you decide on will be perfect. In response to fill in the blanks, I should limit my time on my iPad and read more scripture.
Love those cookie names!
What a wonderful post! Fill in the blank is a great idea! As I read through the comments, I am overwhelmed by how many of these fill in the blanks I relate to and more overwhelmed that each of them belong to such strong and incredible people. I am constantly reminded to give myself some of the grace that I give others. I have grabbed a notebook and started to write down ALL the ones that I relate to and feel. I will be reviewing them during my morning quiet time (aka my first glorious cup of coffee!) as a reminder of my focus and gratitude. Thank you, Mel, for this post as I know I definitely needed it and am amazed that I am not the only one!
I will be true to myself, remembering who I am, what I want and less being and doing what others want.
FYI – I changed “want” to “will” – hoping that the slight, but impactful, change will help trick my brain to start making choices, using the words and making the decisions to support the statement as if I have already achieved the goal.
What a great idea, Anna! I, too, need to write down all the responses that resonate with me…and then do better at being grateful and also implementing small changes. Thank you for your comment!
So I was a little sad to see this post end! Haha. Loved hearing about everything. I would have to say I need to be better at everything studying my scriptures and scrolling less is s great place to start. Hoping Im doing a good job as being a mom. So much I need to work on. Maybe it’s time to make cookies today
Love your posts Mel. Wish we lived closer-I just know we’d be friends. Go Cougs! And where did you get your BYU shirt? Have a great day!
Ah man, I love you right back, Ashlee! Hope you fit in a little cookie making. I got that BYU t-shirt a couple years ago on a blow out 4th of July sale on the BYU bookstore website. I wear it probably more often than I really should. 🙂
Mel- I’ve actually never commented on your site ever but have read it for a couple years now! I saw the loaded cookies and immediately thought “pantry cookies”. I’ve made a rice crispy bar for years with whatever I find in my pantry. My sisters call them pantry bars! Lots of times they don’t have rice crispy in them, whatever cereal is needing used up. I always use marshmallow to bind them and than just find salty and sweet with chocolate and crackers or other cookies chopped up, chips or pretzels, m &m’s or whatever I find. Kids love them!! And adults also. It’s my go to for last minute goody!! I’m sure your cookie is already named but I had to send my thought!! Thanks for many yummy recipes!
Thanks for the first time comment, Maria! Love the cookie name…several other suggested kind of similar ones revolving around “pantry” and I love that idea! Your rice crispy “pantry” bars sound delicious!
Mel, my family has been to Three Peaks Lodge for family reunions, too! It is the best – the kitchen with all its glorious seating is the winning feature for me, but my kids love the secret passageways. Thanks for all your recipes and ideas that help my family!
Those secret passageways kept the kids entertained for HOURS!
I want to do more books, and less screens (although this one will be tricky as we’re temporarily downsizing our life to travel in an RV, so most of my books will be on…..screens).
I want to do more time with my daughter, and less time trying to finish EVERYTHING on my ‘to do’ list.
I want to do more trusting the Lord, and less worrying about what could go wrong.
Love all of these so much, Sandi. And wow! Traveling in an RV sounds super adventurous!
I want to do more accepting and less judging.
I want to do more chilling and less striving.
I want to do more giving and less withholding.
I’m known for my brownies with peanut butter frosting. Planning to serve them at my funeral.
Thanks, Mel, for being so real. Yes, yours is the first site I go to when I need a recipe, but I also love the way you write. Love the fact that you put your struggles right there beside your successes. It makes the rest of us feel more normal, you know.
I want to do more BEING and less DOING. I want to do more gentle responding and less quick reacting. I want to do more savoring and less hurrying!
I second your comment!! I couldn’t have said it better myself! And to Mel, Thank you for keeping it real. I am a follow and you have encouraged me to try new recipes and not stress too much over things if they do not turn out exactly like they should.. keep doing what your doing, sharing real life… the ups and the downs!!
Thank you, Julie!
I want to do more gentle responding and less quick reacting. Thanks for that reminder!
Yes! Loved all of these especially the gentle responding.
I want to do more figuring out as to who I am and what *I* want, and less trying to be what I think everyone else wants.
I think a lot of this tendency is exacerbated by my chronic indecisiveness. When I know what to do and how to do it, I’m really good at a lot of things. Same with when I know what I want. It’s only when I’m struggling to choose or decide that things fall apart for me.
Another thing I think I struggle with is confusing compassion with acquiescence. I think too many of us think that being compassionate and kind means being ready and available to drop everything and be there for another person. But you can still be compassionate and wonderful without doing that too. Being a good person doesn’t mean giving away your time and managing people’s emotions to ensure that they’re happy. And this is a lesson that has been really hard for me to learn. :/
Everything but the Kitchen Sink Cookies
This was an inspired post!! I feel like the day I stumbled upon a recipe from your blog for the first time was a life changing moment for me.
1. We play a game called golf with face cards that sounds q lot like this game. It’s easy to pick up and it can be played quickly.
2. In light of the theme I’ve seen in lots of the comments I’m going to fun them the “All In” cookies. These cookies aren’t afraid to throw every conceivable tasty ingredient into one epic bite. Who says we can’t have it all? i.e. care for ourselves and others at the same time. WE CAN!
3. I think it’s great that your kids are working this summer. My 14 year old is teaching tumbling, babysitting and doing other odd jobs to earn money for school clothes and extracurricular activities.
4. Thanks for the fun family reunion ideas. Last week we had separate gatherings with each side of our families. Honestly I love spending time with family, but I prefer it in small groups rather than in a huge group. For many years I felt guilty about that but I finally understand that it’s ok that I like connecting more one on one and it’s ok that other people in my family love being in huge groups.
5. I love quilting!! When my oldest was about 4 someone bought me a quilting book. I really enjoyed the challenge of piecing that quilt. My mil has a long arm so I can quilt my blankets at her house. I made one for my husband and I this year but when I tried to do the binding my machine broke. Now I have to wait until I can buy a new sewing machine to finish it. I love the flag quilt. Hurrah for overcoming a fear a d getting out of your comfort zone.
6. I very recently heard about pickleball and now I really want to try it!!! There were lots of pickleball courts at the park my daughter practiced softball at.
7. I want to spend more time learning to see the beauty and joy in mundane, every day tasks and less time wishing away those moments for something else. I want to own the life I have right here and now.
So far this summer has been VERY stressful for me. My mom was in and out of the hospital 3 times in 3 weeks. I’ve had a lot of responsibility at church and a lot of people needing me. It’s easy to get lost in the chaos of it all and it helps to remember I’m not alone in all the craziness.
Thanks for sharing your real ups and downs and encouraging everyone who is willing to do the same. With all this support it just feels like we can do those things that seem impossible.
Bridget, you are so kind! Thank you! I’m so glad you found your way here, too. Love the cookie name! No one has suggested that one yet, and it’s so clever. Love it. That’s amazing that your mother in law has a long arm machine. SO nice for quilting those projects! That’s kind of what holds me back. I’m sorry your machine broke! Do you know what kind you’ll be getting? I might be in the market for a new one, too. I have my grandmother’s old Bernina right now. I loooooved your #7. Thanks for inspiring me with that one. I’m sorry about your mom! I hope you are finding your way through the chaos. Hang in there.
I’m so glad you liked Three Peaks lodge! It is one of my kids favorite places. As to your question, I’d like to do more enjoying my kids and less anxiety inducing, over thinking that I’m failing as a parent. My oldest is 13 and I was not prepared for all the changes in her attitude and personality that have come recently. Life is hard but somehow I seem to make it harder by over thinking and worrying about worst case scenarios.
I love your blog and your Friday posts. Thank you for being open and vulnerable, it really means a lot.
Or maybe you should call them the Fantastical Fanatical Amazing Wonderful Beautiful Delicious Astounding Astonishing Surprising Stunning Perplexing Remafkable Spectacular Stupendous Awesome Phenomenal Unbelievable Marvelous Flabbergasting Mind-Blowing Cookies
Haha
Just a suggestion
Haha. GREAT suggestion. 🙂
I think you should call the cookies: Everything Cookies, Wonder Cookies, The Healthiest Cookies Ever, or Mel’s Signature Cookies. Thanks!
You are amazing!I love all your recipes!
I say you should call these cookies “dump truck cookies “
Cute name!
The cookies look great.
Possible name – Cobblestone Cookies
First one to suggest that name and I love it! Clever!
I think you are a great adventurer to jump right in with the long arm. We have lost all our local quilt shops here. You are fortunate to have such a great shop available!
On the quilting topic I wanted to suggest some of the great tutorials available on YouTube. My favorites are from Missouri Star Quilts, and Jordan fabrics.
The Missouri Star videos are fun and easy, and use precuts which means it is much faster to get to the actual sewing.
Jordan Fabrics uses precuts and yardage. The videos are shot with great close ups so you can see the details.
They also offer some kits that are precut in shop. All ready precise and ready to sew, no hassle.
Thanks for your fun blog and the great pictures.
Cheers, Sheri
Hi Mel, this is my first time posting on your website but a long time viewer/reader. I LOVE your website and my husband and I both LOVE your recipes.
What program did you use to create such an awesome flier for the cookie dough? I’m trying to teach myself how to create printable pdfs of (to-do lists, etc). Do you have any helpful tips?
Thank you in advance!
Hi Diana! Thanks for the comment! We used Photoshop for this one (my son has been learning it in school and keeping up with it during the summer and I use it for all my blog photos/design elements).
What a great post! You’re making me want to plan a family reunion! I think you should call the cookies Kitchen Sink Cookies. And I hate gold but maybe I’ll try that game because I LOVE games!
Thanks, Megan!
So many great things to talk about in this post! Thanks for sharing your awesome reunion ideas. We have several more years till it’s our turn to host again, but that cabin sounds just about perfect. And 9 square?? I’m going to have to look into that for sure. I showed my husband the bobblehead skit idea. Our reunion next week incorporates a lip sync battle, and I think we’re going to do it! I’m impressed with how hardworking your kids are! That’s something we’re working on. Good job on your quilt! So can you go to a quilt shop and rent the use of a long arm quilting machine? I am a self-taught quilter, and I really like it, but I don’t do it as much as I wish though. I finally bought a walking foot so I could straight-line quilt my own at home. I felt guilty always asking ladies at church to quilt them for me, and paying someone is so expensive! I hope you share more of your quilting! I’ve never played pickle ball, and now I feel behind the times. As for the fill-in-the-blank, let’s start with, I want to do more teaching my kids to work hard, and less bankrolling their stuff. I want to do more quilting for friends and less wasting time on facebook. I want to do more fundraising for pediatric brain cancer research, and less being anxious and afraid of rejection. I want to spend more meaningful time with my kids, and less time nagging them and being distracted by my phone. Phew! I have a lot to work on. Thanks for keeping it real, Mel!
I’m giggling just at the thought of the bobblehead skit that might make an appearance at your family reunion. They are so fun and so hilarious. So what I’m learning about quilt shops is that most of them require you to take a long arm quilting class before you can use their machines (my mom has taken the class which is how I got access to getting my grubby little hands on one). I think I’m going to take a long arm quilting class here local – it only costs usually between $15-25 per hour to rent the long arm machines (and that flag quilt only took an hour to quilt) so it is significantly cheaper than sending it away to have it quilted by a professional! Loved your fill in the blanks. I think if given the time, I could come up with a hundred more. Now the hard part is putting my responses into action!
I thought of you a lot this past week and have some things to report. 1) I am so impressed with how you are raising your kids. You are teaching them to work, teaching them the value of money, teaching them the gospel, and a million other things. You’re amazing. 2) I think your structured summers are awesome. I grew up that way. At times I resented getting up at the crack of dawn to work in our garden, but I’m SO grateful for the work ethic it taught me. I’ve seen other commenters question your making your kids work so hard, and I know my parents dealt with similar feelings from some of our neighbors. But I think it’s a great way to raise your kids. Keep it up. 3) I just got back from flaming gorge with my husband’s family. Five straight days of camping and boating and being in the sun/water and I DID NOT GET SUNBURNED. I don’t think I even got tan. I tried to stay covered and my hubby and I went through an entire bottle of sunscreen. I’m pretty proud of myself and thought you would be too. 4) At said family boating trip, I made your bbq pulled pork sandwiches. I made the meat in advance and reheated it in a stock pot over the camp stove. All the stirring during the reheating turned my painstakingly perfectly shredded pork into an unappealing mash. It still tasted amazing, but it looked despicable. Any tips on how to avoid this in the future? 5) To answer your question, I want to do more house projects and I want to judge people less.
Thank you, sweet Beth. I appreciate your kind words. One thing I’m trying to learn as a parent (and am getting a lot better at it!) is to distance myself from the criticism of others and actually value them for how they parent…and continue in confidence with how Brian and I are parenting. We make mistakes, I’m sure we’ll change course a million times with our kids and how we do things, but it feels right for now. So thanks for saying those things. Also, WAY TO GO on camping and boating for 5 days and rocking the suncare. You have no idea how bad of a happy dance I could do about that! Amazing. And just so awesome. Way to go you and your husband! Ok, on the BBQ pork, I totally know what you mean. One way to get around this is to cook it in advance but don’t shred it before freezing. Or just shred into maybe 4-6 large chunks. You can still pour in the BBQ sauce OR just freeze the cooked meat (I like to add a bit of the cooking juices), let it thaw, add the BBQ sauce and shred as it reheats. Does that make sense?
I think the cookies look a little like PRETZEL MONSTER COOKS! One caveat I’ve been focusing on is what I’m proud of myself for – whether it’s at work or stuff around the house. I find myself, when people come down me, saying how proud of myself I am for who I am & for doing what I actually do. Sounds weird, but it’s how I have been feeling for all of 2019. Gone are the days when I felt that that I wasn’t enough. In that vein I am proud of myself for the huge uptick in my water consumption (thx to some jazzy new water bottles I got) & less diet soda consumption. I’d like to eat less at night, & get back to exercising more than once a week~ I ❤️ You, Mel. Thank u for providing this safe community.
Great name suggestion! Thank you for sharing what you did, Lauren! I love that you’ve been able to turn the tables and be proud of yourself. That is huge!
Oh my goodness, I LOVE your Friday Thoughts posts. You are so real and genuine. I appreciate that you let us know you have normal human struggles too. That family reunion looks amazing! I love the bobble head skit and the baby photos games. So so fun. As for my fill in the blank, I wish I could do more service happily, and feel less overwhelm about all the service we get to do. Right now I’m feeling pretty overwhelmed by church, not at all testimony, just all the doing for other people. My husband is the Bishop and I’m in the RS Presidency and some days I feel like the two of us are doing everything. Occasionally I’m reduced to tears over it. It’s ridiculous. Today was a good example-this morning we did a funeral for a lady in the ward, then my husband and boys went and chopped trees down for an elderly couple, and now they’re helping with a move. I love church and I love the people at church, but I want to feel like I have more to give and less resentment about it. Whew, that’s probably too much sharing! Oh well, we love you at our house, Mel!
Madison! That is a heavy load. Don’t hold back the tears. There’s nothing wrong with shedding those. My husband is Bishop of our ward but my calling is the best one in the church (primary pianist) 🙂 so I have it easy. I wish I had the easy answers on transitioning to feeling less overwhelmed. I don’t! But I will say I think you are remarkable for serving even if it does feel overwhelming. That counts, you know – every last second of it counts. For you and for those you are serving. Hang in there, my friend!
You are the sweetest! Thanks for the encouraging words. And I would agree with you – Primary pianist is one of the best callings ever! I got to do that calling today and I love it.
Mel, you are a gem. You truly, truly are! I want to do less thinking and more doing. My mind stops me in my tracks and I keep hitting the same glass ceilings. Hoping someday to learn how to work through and beyond that. Love these posts! Hugs to you and your sweet family. ❤
Overthinkers unite! I’m right there with you. You are amazing, amazing inspiration to me at all you have worked through and overcome.
I want to do MORE of spending more time with my older boys. And LESS of….. there is so much of this I beat myself up about. I don’t even want to go there. But as my older sons are working/stuff with friends/church camps, etc… I feel like my time is slipping away with them. My days are spent doing fun things with my younger kids but I miss my time with my older boys!
I so agree with this! I was thinking the same thing just last week. I give a big amen to your answer…I’m making some goals to try to fit more time in with those teenagers whose lives are so busy!
The cookies look yummy! Name suggestions:
Kit and Caboodle cookies
The Whole Shebang Cookies
Love those names!
Hi Mel, I enjoyed your post, (I read it at 3am when I woke up with huge anxiety, our house was supposed to sell and the people backed out!) I appreciate your honesty, you don’t let us readers feel like your life is perfect and things just fall into place for you effortlessly. You have challenges just like the rest of us, perhaps, there’s some sort of weird comfort in knowing everybody has these hurdles and what may be difficult for some is just a walk in the park for others, they’re still issues nonetheless. I currently have a real struggle going on and over the years I’ve realized it’s time, it all passes with time, it’s still uncomfortable, but, chances are it’s not permanent and we can’t have good without bad. For me I need to realize I can’t change certain things, I need to let go of that and embrace the things I can change. Sometimes I need a little outside help, thanks hubby, to recognize what I can and can’t change.
If you haven’t already decided on a name for the cookie, maybe Crush Cookie since people will fall in love with them♀️
Thanks, again, Mel, for everything you do for us!
Oh man, Shellie – I am SO sorry to hear about your house sale falling through and the subsequent anxiety. That is rough. I’m working on letting go, too. It’s so hard, huh? Good luck working through some of those challenges…thank you for commenting!
Love your Friday thoughts! I want to do more loving and less criticizing.
Love, love, love this, Karen. Me, too.
I want to do more carefree fun and less stressing about my to-do list. My husband says I would make an incredible military leader 🙂
That cabin looks AMAZING! My mom has already looked it up and is planning on booking it for a family reunion.
These posts make me love you even more. Anxiety is my challenge in life and I must tell you that the Brooke Snow Podcast has been revolutionary in helping me turn this around. Her Gospel Meditation is the greatest thing I ever dedicated myself to doing.
Thanks for being such a bright light for so many yourself!
Haha, Marci, that made me laugh. I think I might make a good military leader also then?? 🙂 I’m excited your family might look into that lodge! It’s so amazing. Thank you for the podcast recommendation!
Two things:
Re: family reunion outdoor games. Best lawn game I’ve come across in a long time is called Kan Jam. It’s a team frisbee game that’s very portable and friendly for all ages. I can’t frisbee to save my life, but it’s a lot of fun and I think your family might like it!
Re: fill in the blanks. I want to do more participating and less watching. I’ve got anxiety/depression struggles that tend to trick me into staying on my couch 90% of the time. It’s been impossible lately to find the motivation to get up and out and be present with my kids and engage with friends and family… I wish I could engage with life more. My oldest goes to kindergarten in a month and I keep thinking of things we should do before we’re tied to the school schedule and the weather turns crummy, but making them happen just isn’t happening.
Kan Jam! My brother in law brought that to our family reunion and it was so fun! You are right, it’s a winner! Thank you for being willing to share your fill in the blank answer! Making things actually happen is a struggle for me at times, too. Good luck with that goal – I think if tackled in small bits, you (and I!) can do things that feel big and impossible. Thank you for your comment!
First off.. Can I just say completely amazing you are?? Life is so busy I cannot imagine planning and pulling off an entire family reunion. (I know not only LDS people do family reunions) but my husband and I have both parents that are concerts to the church, so we’ve never been able to experience a family reunion. I am so envious of people that have them. They sound so fun and such an amazing experience to be around all your family members at one time.
Anyways, back on track. I remember you recently said your husband was the Bishop. My husband was recently called and I just wonder HOW DO YOU DO IT ALL?? You have 5 kids, I only have 3 (ages 9-4) and I feel overwhelmed.
Also your answers to the fill in the blank sentence is beyond relatable. I often worry SO much about hurting other people or inconveniencing them that it hurts me and inconveniences me. I wish I could let that go. I have gotten a tiny tiny tiny bit better over the years, but not even close to where I should be. I was JUST thinking tonight if only I spent as much time on reading the Come Follow Me manual as I do Instagram my life would be so much better. Less comparing and more meaningful, spiritual downtime. I have so much room for improvement. I know I usually sound like an obsessed stalker so I’m sorry to seem that way (hahaha) but I truly do admire you so much. You have so much balance in your life, and I’m always so impressed how you share personal stories and testimony building experiences. I will never forget your cheese ball experience and it has made me really try to be aware and able to receive guidance from the spirit. Thanks for the AMAZING recipes and for the great example to me. You are amazing!!
For me I want to do more quality time with my kids and less being impatient with them”
Oh girl, we could be having a teary heartfelt talk on my back porch about all this. I DO NOT DO IT ALL. I cry myself to sleep sometimes. I pray a lot. A lot. I go on walks (or just put in my earphones and listen to an audible book on the floor of my pantry – no lie). You know, coping skills. I just feel strongly we all need to understand none of us can do it all. Right??? If someone has the secret, let me know! Haha. I feel overwhelmed a lot. You are not alone. No way, no way. Feel free to shoot me an email about all things venting related to Bishop stuff (and unrelated, too). We could chat for a long while about that. You are the sweetest – thank you for your comment. I think so many of us women in this comment thread feel instantly relatable to each other by just opening up about some of our insecurities and trials and fill in the blank sentences. You are an amazing momma.
Oh my goodness! This reminded me that my sister and I, when we were 8 & 10 years old (which was many moons ago), used to buy ingredients from our mom, make cookies and then load up our wagon and walk all over town selling “Freshly Baked Cookies” to earn money for summer camp…. I had totally forgotten about that so thank-you for reminding me! 🙂
I want to do more “Doing” and less “Planning” I can spend hours “planning” and not do so that needs to change.
Your quilt is beautiful by the way! Nice Job!
That is such an awesome memory, Jamie! Way to go you and your sister!
That quilt though! I’m in love. I want to learn to do that. I sewed with my mom as a girl. Hope I haven’t forgotten everything. I just don’t know how to juggle priorities and make time. I feel like nothing gets finished. And then I’m unhappy. I think I’d like to do more of living peacefully amid the chaos and make fewer decisions based on what I think others want me to do. I guess that’s my fill in the blank.
So grateful for all the wonderful thoughts and ideas you give. I love every bit. Much love.
I sewed with my mom a little bit as a girl and was pleasantly surprised at what I remembered when I picked up the hobby almost 25 years later (also, it’s amazing the amount of tutorials online – saved my life more times than I count in quilting crises). I also get stressed when I don’t finish things and then I get resentful and ornery…and usually have an epiphany that it’s actually no one’s fault but my own. Loved your fill in the blank.
Love the info on Family Reunions. Ours is in about 2 weeks. I’m using one of your recipes for the meal we are in charge of. I love the idea of the Baby face game! Most of our family is in Idaho and Utah area, and there are 50+of us, so we may have to look into Three Peaks Lodge.
As for the fill in the blank…
I want to do more playing with my kids and less nagging.
Have fun at your upcoming reunion, Emma!
Love this post! That family reunion site sounds amazing and so fun! Have you ever listened to The Life Coach School podcast by Brook Castillo? She is amazing and I’ve learned so many things about managing my emotions and setting boundaries, etc. You can scroll through her podcast episodes (she’s got tons of great ones) and I know I’ve listened to a good one on boundaries before. She’s full of awesome, sensible advice. As for me…I want to be more disciplined with my goals and less scared of following my dreams.
I’ve heard of her podcast, Cindy, but never listened to it. Thanks for the reminder!
Hmm…so many thoughts about this post. I loved your family reunion ideas as I am planning our family reunion next year. We are much smaller than 48 though! For my more or less statement: I want to do more laughing and less thinking/worrying. I think too much and lately do not know where my fun loving, hilarious self has gone. But even though life is hard it is meant to be enjoyed. I waited almost 20 years to have my daughter and then 18 months later my son and I am so thankful for them but life just still brings you hard times even though everything is pretty darn great. I’m trying to learn to control the negative thoughts I have about myself…getting older, post-baby body, how I am as a wife and mother, sister, daughter, friend, etc. Just trying to give myself a break and not be so much of a perfectionist or have such high/nearly unattainable expectations of myself. Mel, you are awesome. I’ve loved reading the comments while I ignore my cute chubby baby’s cries (he went back to sleep). You have a unique gift of bringing people together. Thank you for everything you do!
Oh gosh, Jill, I loved everything you said. So, so true about life bringing hard stuff even though there are miracles and blessings everywhere. I agree this comment thread is golden and it’s helped me so much reading through the comments, too! I got a little choked up (it’s late, I don’t know why I’m emotionally fragile right now??) that you waited 20 years to have your sweet kids…and I just wanted to wrap my arms around you in a virtual hug to say you are enough, you are amazing, you are a good momma, and I’ll work on my daily negative thoughts as you work on yours and we’ll take it one day at a time. Ok? ok. It’s been a really hard couple of weeks around here for me for so many reasons – I know I’m meant to be learning a lot of things right now namely how to stop worrying about things that are out of my control (but I also get stuck in a pattern of feeling guilty for feeling miserable when life is also really good). Anyway, I’m rambling. But thanks for checking in (and glad that cute little babe went back to sleep). 🙂
Filling in the blanks: I’d like to do more traveling and less worrying about things I cannot control! And I would call the cookies The Kitchen Sink and Then Some!
Love the name for the cookies! And love your fill in the blank response. Here’s to hoping you get more travel and less worry!
This reminds me of the everything but the kitchen sink cookie recipe I have !
I have been thinking all day about what I want to more or and less of. It is such a loaded question for me. Being a wife, mom and nurse for 25 plus years, you lose track of your own desires and boundaries. Thank you for reminding me and all your followers to think about what we would want more of or less of. I love reading about your beautiful family, your adventures and cooking. May we all fulfill our fill in the blank .
Ah, thank you for your comment. I hope as you’ve pondered the question today, you’ve been able to sort through those lost boundaries and desires to find a little clarity.
1. Never heard of the card game Play Nine but looks interesting will have to get it.
2. A name for the cookies could be This N That Cookies. 3. Nice to see that the kids are not afraid of working and earning money for camp and the upcoming family trip. 4. Your family reunions always look like so much fun, inclusive and surely memorable. Thanks for sharing with us.
Thanks, Melinda! Love the name for the cookies! And lest I make it look as though my kids never complain about work, let me keep it real by saying there are some painful days sometimes. Haha. All part of the growing up process!
Everything and the Kitchen Sink cookies!
So so many suggestions for that popular name! Very fitting! 🙂
Quilting – this has become a hobby of mine too. I paper piece quilt and it is so fun! Check out http://www.fandominstitches.com. I made a Harry Potter bookcase quilt. I LOVE it!
Oh my goodness, Tanya! My jaw dropped when I saw that quilt. My resident 12-year old would die, literally die, if I made that quilt, but it is WAY out of my quilting comfort zone. I paper pieced the Book Nerd quilt by Angela Pingel a couple years ago and it took my brain a while to understand paper piecing. You are so talented!
I CANNOT wait for that cookie recipe….all my favorites rolled or I should say baked into one!!! I would say I’ll be naming it my munchie surprise!!
And I would have to say I would want to do …more things that I want to do and way less micro managing others. Mel, I hear ya, on this one….I never want to upset anyone either and I’m the one upset at the end of it all. It’s a tough one for sure. Love your Friday Posts, they make me smile, make me think of new projects and enjoy every word!
Thank you for your comment, Judi! First of all, that cookie recipe will be posted very, very soon! I think you’re going to love it! Also, it sounds like there are a lot of us that don’t like upsetting others. It’s a real fear! And it’s ok to feel like that…but I’m like you, I don’t like feeling upset at the end either. Good luck managing that (as I work on my end, too!). Love you right back. 🙂
I love your Friday thoughts, I joke all the time that you are my virtual bestie!
1. I just got the game tiki topple, super duper fun for all ages and easy
2. Little nuggets of goodness
3. Wow! That is impressive 20 dozen already sold! My two oldest have jobs, but two youngest nope.
4. Your family reunion looked amazing. Totally doing the bobble head skit and baby face challenge
5. Quilting is a skill I have not yet tried to conquer. Way to make it look doable!
6. I love pickleball.
7. I want to do more things with my kids and less things by myself.
Haha, thanks, Julie! I’m up for virtual besties! Done! Lots of recommendations for that tiki topple game. I’m going to look into it! If you saw me groaning and complaining under my breath, I’m sure you would realize I don’t really make quilting look doable. Ha. But it’s a good side hobby for me right now even if I love to hate it. I actually really love your #7 fill in the blank. Thanks for sharing that.
Trail mix cookie!
We love Mexican Train with dominos.
Thanks for the lentil soup link – I’ll be trying that for my next soup night when it’s not 112-F here.
Not sure if I’ve ever been to a family reunion. I hope to do something with my kids and grandkids and start the tradition.
I love to quilt and I’d love to own a long arm
machine because it seems silly to build a quilt with my own two hands and then allow someone else finish it. But also hard to find time to quilt with 5 kids.
We discovered pickleball about 5 years ago on vacation in DE. More popular back east?? Just got dad his own net, paddles and balls for father’s day and then we drew a court in a cul de sac with chalk.
For the fill in the blank, I’ve been working on your first one. Doing what I need/want to do, not what I think will make others happy. It’s hard.
Thanks for the game recommendation! And yeah, totally icky thinking of making soup when it’s that hot. You poor thing! Yikes. I hear you on the quilting thing. It’s only been the last year or so that I could even think about quilting with five kids. And it’s also the reason it takes me years to finish one. Yes, years! I’m excited about pickle ball and possibly figuring out a way to rig up our own court! Love your fill in the blank answer. That is one of my top fill in the blanks, too, I think. It is hard. Keep at it, my friend.
Thanks for such a thought-provoking task!
I want to do more of the things I know to be right for me and my family and less trying to please everyone else around me.
[Couldn’t keep to just one. Haha!]
I want to do more sticking up for myself and less getting stirred up about it. 🙂
Thanks for all you do with your blog and recipes!
All those answers could be my answers, Nancy! I totally get it!
I have not developed this fully yet, but have been processing this the last few days. I am on a girls’ trip with two of my besties in Hannibal, MO. Not much to do here except visit all the Mark Twain exhibits, which I have found profound. I am amazed at the mind of Mark Twain. I reread Tom Sawyer prior to coming and loved it again. I started Huck Finn but didn’t get it completed. However, in one of the exhibits there was a 90 minute PBS video and it included Huck Finn and his relationship with Jim. At the end, Huck is battling with whether to turn Jim in or not and decides he would rather go to hell, if that is the consequence, than turn in his friend. This would have been earth shattering for this time, to go against the norm of slavery and view him as human. This got me thinking about what kinds of “slavery norms” do I carry as my baggage? What have I been taught as normal that I should reject? I haven’t fully figured all this out yet, but my girlfriend (who couldn’t come with us) texted me about the book “The Circle,” which I read a couple years ago. It is crazy what we do socially because we are told to and becomes the norm of which all others are judged. I turned 50 this month. I thought I would come up with some new goals for my next 10 years, which usually consist of the same things…. eat less, exercise more, read my Bible, volunteer more, think more positively. However, I think I want to start thinking for myself and recognize when I am not thinking for myself. Do more things that matter to me. I have been making things matter for other people my whole entire life and feel I have sacrificed myself in the works of kindness and keeping all my loved ones happy. I am not saying I won’t do those things too, but how many times have I done things that I didn’t want to do AT ALL, but did it to make someone else happy? I am getting off on a tangent.. Told you I hadn’t thought this through yet. I want to think for myself more. Now, we look back at Huck Finn and he was making the correct moral choice, but at the time he was going to hell for it. Every new generation has this responsibility to the moral fiber of themselves. I would love my next 30 years or so to be ones that help me live my best life, which would also help those around me to also do the same.
Beth…this is so profound. Thank you for sharing this. I appreciate your words. I think so often we think it has to be either/or. Like, I either worry about my own needs or I worry about someone else’s needs. But both can happen. I think what really matters is figuring out our own moral compass, staying true to that (even if it isn’t popular), and really just think for ourselves more. You are awesome.
I want to do more purging of all of my stuff and less “managing” of all of my stuff. I’m not a hoarder by any means but I feel weighed down by so many belongings.
Also, can we talk about pickleball?? Is it not the bet sport ever? I’ve been playing for about 3 years. We started a group here with myself, my dad, and my brother and it has grown to over 40 people. We bought two nets from Amazon and measured and taped out two courts in our church gym and we play there 3 days a week. It’s so fun and addicting!
Oh gosh, yes to the yes on this, Monica. Purge and stop managing. I could get behind this. That’s amazing about your pickleball league/group! I love that so much!
That nine square game looks like a ton of fun! And we have Play Nine and love playing it also – looks like a fantastic and memorable family reunion!
Thanks, Patricia! Happy you love that card game, too!
I am with you, I want to be true to myself and not worry about the emotions of others, (because they are not my responsibility).
Yes!
Mel, you’re the best! What an awesome family reunion. Can’t wait to see the cookie recipe. I’m home sick today, so more running, less laying down for me. But on a normal day, I’d probably say I’d like more free time outside of work, and less chores. I don’t mind going to work, but I hate having to come home and take care of necessary, but mundane tasks that I don’t enjoy. Like I wish I could just make dinner without chopping all the produce and doing the dishes. I’m sure most people commenting here wish they had their own personal assistant! But hey, maybe someday? ♀️
Good point, Anne – that fill in the blank sentence could change on the daily depending on circumstances! I hope you get feeling better soon! Haha, and yes, I could get behind a personal assistant. I try to tell my kids that’s what they are for but they just give me the side eye. 🙂
I love pickle ball! We got really into it last fall when we did a family reunion with Lisa & Shawn, and both of Tyler’s brothers (& wives). I may have gotten a tad bit competitive, but we had a complete blast with it!
I bet that was so fun, Tahnee!
I think your cookies look amazing! I would call them Crazy 8s!
Love that name!
It’s hard to fill in the blank.. I’ve read some of the comments and I want to agree to all of them. But I will just say: I want to show more love to my kids and less complaining or criticizing myself for my weaknesses.
Life is a roller coaster, there’s always ups and downs; fun and scary; and the good thing is that we don’t go thru it alone.
Thanks Mel, for the little auto evalution
Thanks for sharing your fill in the blank answer, Jocy! And yes, thankfully we don’t go through this alone. I can’t even imagine.
Hell of a Mess cookies
Heavenly Wonders
Love of my life Cookies
Whippersnappers
Pleasers
Little Messes
Braggers
Calorie Bombs? (Ha!)
Haha. Great name suggestions!
St. Anthony is ♥️♥️♥️♥️♥️ We’ve lived here for almost 10 years now. I hope you went to Big J’s for pizza bombs!
I have to confess we did not (I think if our size of group descended on a small town restaurant, we would create a lot of stress and chaos!). Next time, though, for sure!
I want to do more things with my kids and less nagging/complaining about/to them.
Love your Friday posts . . . and your quilt. I, too am a perfectionist, and quilting is definitely a love/hate relationship, ha-ha.
The reunion sounded perfect. Wish my family was geographically closer to take advantage of that house in St. Anthony – it looks like it would be perfect for my family too.
So glad I’m not the only one with a love/hate relationship with quilting! And I could easily have filled in the blank with that same answer. You’re a good momma for even recognizing it. It’s a day at a time type of process, I think.
Oh my goodness Mel!!! I am so proud of you and your quilt!!! I have followed you for YEARS on here and I am a fellow quilter. I LOVE Camille Roskelley and most of my fabric is B & C fabric. I have a quilting IG account if you ever want to give it a follow. @ reneesquilting I also have a longarm quilting business. If you ever want any more quilts quilted I would be happy to do them for FREE. That is the least I could do after all the hundreds of awesome recipes I have gotten from you after all these years. I mean it. I would be happy to quilt them for you. My daughter just got married and was asking me for a bunch of recipes and I just kept answering “that’s Mel’s recipe, that’s Mel’s…yeah that’s Mel’s too.” You are already influencing the next generation. My kids have literally grown up on your recipes. Thanks for all you do!!
Renee, oh my gosh, you are the sweetest. I love that now we can bond over cookies AND quilting. Haha. Your account is amazing – you are so talented! I would never (NEVER!) let you long arm quilt something of mine for free. I know the time that goes into that (ok, admittedly I was super slow when I did the flag quilt, but still!). But it would be so fun to see you work. 🙂 Your comment made me so happy. Good luck to your daughter in this new exciting phase of life!
Hi Mel!! I’ve been working and learning how to set boundaries this summer. It’s been hard. I felt like I was consumed by the actions and ideas of other people. A couple days ago I finally had a conversation to set some boundaries. I was so scared before the conversation that I was physically sick. I worried the conversation wouldn’t go well. It was actually AWFUL. Worse than I could have imagined, but I held firm and set my boundaries. Even though I felt terrible for the way the conversation unfolded, I feel totally liberated and free. I’ve spent so much time sacrificing things I wanted to do to try to gain favor with this person. Turns out they hate me anyway. I’m free to do whatever I want now because they aren’t going to like me either way. I feel so happy. I’ve been sleeping so well. I don’t worry about what they think. I feel empowered to hold firm with my boundaries. I wish I did this years and years ago!
I want to spend less time doing what others think I should do and more time doing what I feel like I should be doing.
Oh my goodness, thank you for sharing that experience! My stomach tensed up and I started sweating just reading about. I’m not even kidding. I was so bummed when you said it went worse than you could have imagined…but then reading how you still felt liberated…I was so happy to read that. I am just really proud of you for doing something that was so incredibly hard.
That’s the key, Mel. That’s what I’m still trying to learn fully, after alllll these years of trying. You can’t look for either permission or forgiveness for doing what you need to for yourself and your family. The rest (what other people do, the choices they make, whether they approve of my choices) is generally not my business.
We have to redefine success in setting boundaries. Success is setting them, not in other people being happy about the boundaries we’ve decided we need to set for our own health and well-being.
Is it a woman/girl thing? I fear it might be.
That line, Nicole, “redefine success in setting boundaries” and your follow up sentence is…wow…so profound and so true. I think I may need to tattoo that on my forehead.
I love reading your thoughts! Thank you for sharing and I LOVE your quilt! I miss quilting but with 2 young kids, life is too hard to quilt right now. I’ll get back to it. Cookie name idea… Kitchen Sink Cookie is good since you can put everything in it but if your kids are loving these then I would suggest the Mary Poppins Cookie because Mary Poppins is Practically Perfect in Every Way which is like this cookie. Good luck naming it!
Yeah, it took me getting to a phase of life where my youngest was six before I even took on quilting. I can’t imagine doing it with little littles. So many suggestion for the almighty kitchen sink cookie! It’ll take a miracle name resurgence of another suggestion for the kitchen sink cookie not to win out! But I have to admit, I think the Mary Poppins name suggestion might be my personal favorite!
I want to do more smiling, and less unintentional scowling (i.e resting grumpy face).
I love reading these responses. Thank you, Wendy!
You are totally NOT the last one on earth to play Pickle ball. Our family has never played but our city JUST finished some pickleball courts, and we can borrow pickle ball supplies from our local library, so I’m guessing we will soon join the pickleball party. 🙂 Thank you for sharing everything that you did for the family reunion. I will reference this post in a couple years when we are in charge of a family reunion. 🙂
Also, I want to do more loving and less criticizing. This is huge for me. ♥️
Oh man, LUCKY about the courts and borrowing pickleball paddles! I hope you love it! I’ll join you on the more loving less criticizing train. I need that reminder, too.
Mel wish I had more time to respond to all your thoughts! I loved seeing all the games and fun from your reunion and love the cookie business idea! My 8.5 son was all over that! I’m definitely still learning about boundaries so thanks for your thoughts. I would say today more family time and books, less screens and noises. More trust and less fear.
Thanks for your response, Rachel. Thank you, thank you! More trust, less fear. LOVED that one.
Cookie name idea: peanut butter insanity
Ooooh, yes, love that!
More laughing less yelling
I second this one!
I third it!
I like Fibber McGee cookies. Younger readers may not have heard of it , but I do still hear closets that are spilling over referred to as Fibber McGee closets. These cookies sound like spilling over with contents of all sorts of goodies.
Great name suggestion for these cookies!
Such a great comment, Elaine! I have a feeling my game closet could have been referred to as a Fibber McGee closet based on your description! Haha.
I forgot to comment on your last Friday Thoughts post with this cute thing that happened. When Hope returned from college this Spring, my littles where like “Yay! Now we get muddy buddies again!” I guess her signature dish was making MB every time she babysat them.
It has been much too long since we’ve had a face to face talk session where we solve all of life’s problems.
Ok, that’s way too cute about Hope and her siblings. They are going to have to wait quite a bit longer now that she’s in Romania. 🙂 And what I wouldn’t give for a life solving session with you. I need one pretty bad. Some hard stuff this week, and I just don’t really know how to wade through it all. Could use some expert mom advice.
I’m going to have to check out that reunion location in Idaho! Thanks!
That baby face game sounds fun!
It’s such a great place, Cherice!
I want to be around people more and less by myself (or only with sister
Thanks for sharing this!
I want to do more personal development (reading, exercising, self-reflection), and less worrying about things out of my control.
I am currently on a road trip back home to Oklahoma from Minnesota with the family (7 year old and 6 month old, and sometimes the hubby can be a kid lol).
It was my turn not to drive and your Friday thoughts popped up in my email. Thank you for your blog! I greatly enjoy seeing how other mothers in this crazy world keep themselves somewhat sane.
The first name I thought after reading the ingredients was “Kitchen Sink” because there seemed to be everything but in them.
Haha, why did I laugh out loud at the hubby comment? Hit too close to home, I think. 🙂 Good luck with your road trip! I think all us women are just doing our best to keep sane – some days better than others, huh? I, too, need to worry less about things out of my control. Why is that so dang hard for me??
#2: I’d call them the Michael Scott cookie! Or maybe “The Works.” For non-Office watchers, there’s an episode where Michael orders a soft pretzel and when presented with 18 topping choices including glazes, candies, nuts, etc. he asks for them all…the baker says “The Works? You got it!” Either way, can’t wait for the recipe!
#7: Boy can I identify with taking on emotions/problems of others. My generic fill-in-the-blank would be “I want to do more sleeping and less worrying.” Before bed last night I was telling my husband of all the thoughts that run through my head before I can settle down and sleep – as a benign example, “it’s hot this weekend and your mom’s out of town, does she need her plants watered, even though she didn’t ask us to?” He looked at me in shock at the way my brain works. Why can’t I just fall asleep instantly like him? 😛 I hope you find a way to lessen those anxieties…most of us worry way too much. I will say therapy is definitely helping in identifying the small and big ways we can set boundaries on a daily basis. I’ve become a firm believer that anyone can benefit from it.
I laughed out loud at #1. That is the greatest name suggestion ever. I can’t stop giggling. And seriously, Miss Molly, we could be twins. I’ve actually just started turning to Brian and saying “if you knew what was going through my mind right now, you’d be shocked” and he calmly says “yes, I bet I would…what can I help you with?” My plea for him to do half the worrying so I would only do half doesn’t really work (and at the end of the day I’m grateful we are wired differently). Thank you for your thoughts (and YES, yes to therapy helping – agree with that wholeheartedly).
Oh, Mel. It’s so good to read your posts. I love reading the comments for these Friday posts- unsurprisingly, your readers seem to be a pretty funny, thoughtful, honest and lovely group. I wish we could all get together irl. I’d like to spend more time listening and less time talking- like another reader. There’s a great parenting book called Duct Tape Parenting (don’t worry the duct tape is for the parents) that advocates for the importance of listening. I also want to spend more time doing and less time wishing and waiting.
You hit the nail right on the head, Rebecca – you wonderful readers are the best part of these posts (and anything else I post!). I wouldn’t be here still if it wasn’t for such a great group of women (and a few men!). If I could bring everyone together in some epic real life retreat in my upstairs bonus room (no makeup, no fancy clothes, just 100% authentic hanging out and talking and of course, eating), I would do it. Thanks for the book recommendation! And for your fill in the blank answer. I thought that was profound.
For the name of the cookie…”junk drawer”. A little bit of everything 🙂
Haha, GREAT!
As if I didn’t love you enough already with your hilarious videos and amazing recipes but now I find out you quilt and use thimble blossoms patterns, just some more of my favorite things.
For me I want to do more things that make me happy and less comparing of those things to others which in turn can make me feel bad about myself. These are all mainly in the ways of parenting and raising my one year old. Year one is such a change and it’s been a bit rough!
Also more sewing/crafts/reading and less scrolling. I have more time for hobbies than I let myself believe.
Ah, thanks, Jessica! Glad you love thimble blossoms and quilting, too! Your last sentence is so true of my life, too! I waste a lot of time that just doesn’t need wasting with dumb stuff. Good luck with your sweet one year old. It is rough starting out – no doubt about that. Hang in there, momma!
I want to play more pickle ball and do less chores. Seriously I’m obsessed. It has become my hobby. I play nearly every day with a group of ladies. It has saved my sanity by providing friendships, exercise and a place to belong (outside of mom life.) You should totally put a court on your property. Best family game ever. It’s a game that grandparents, kids, non-athletes, and athletes can play together. I love it.
Haha. That might be my next fill in the blank answer myself. I didn’t know you played every day! Way to go, Tami. That’s awesome.
More appreciation, less comparing myself to others.
Love this, Jennifer!
Beautiful post! Thank you!!!
1) Family Reunion – my brother and sister-in-law (with their one son) have asked us (with four kids) to join them & grandparents in Mexico next year at an all-inclusive beach resort. Looks so fun (a chef cooking all 3 meals – with room service!), but way out of our budget. Love the ideas you had for your reunion in Idaho!! Going to check out the place, too. And copied the 9-Square pic to show Hubby and ask for one. It’d make a great project for him & my 14 year old son who recently asked to be taught a “shop” class.
2) Cookie Name – Everything But the Kitchen Sink was my first thought …. but then I saw the comment about tying in your cousin’s wedding. Great idea! Maybe Something Cookies – as in “Something Old, Something New, Something Borrowed, Something Blue?” 🙂
3) Working Kids – my 14 year old son mows his aunt’s yard and occasionally feeds neighbor’s pets. He is so excited for next year when he will be old enough to lifeguard (5+ years on swim team, so not a stretch). My 12 year old daughter wants to do something, but no idea what. I’m going to suggest the cookie dough. She would LOVE that!
4) Fill In the Blank – “I want to do more letting my kids cook in the kitchen by themselves and less I’ll do it myself so the kitchen stays clean and we eat at a decent hour.” Seriously. That’s been my theme this week and needs to be my theme for the rest of the year! You ask what’s for dinner – you get to make it! 🙂
I agree – I think that 9 square game would be such a great father/son project! Love that. So many recommendations for the kitchen sink cookie name. It’s a winner for sure, but I love how you tied it in to my cousin’s wedding. Clever! Exciting your son can get a job lifeguarding next year. My husband did that all through is teen years to save for college! I’ve been surprised at what a great “job” the cookie dough has been! He’s been getting orders every day and the great thing is he can spend a few days making huge batches and freezing it for when the orders come in. And oh man, your fill in the blank answer could be mine, too! I’ve really let go the last few years and it’s been amazing to see my kids blossom, but hard. It’s so hard.
Great post, Mel. I want to do more “doing” and less thinking. I tend to come up with great plans and projects that never quite materialize because of other time/financial obligations. I’d like to just go out and do it more often.
Spontaneity! I need to do that, too. Thanks for the response!
Love Love your thoughts. We are looking for a venue for a family reunion similar to what you did. We live in southern California and are open to anything. My name for your amazing cookie is “Over the Top Cookie”. You know like all the stuff on top!!!!! How did you research places for the reunion? Can’t wait for the cookie recipe next week.!! Thanks for all the inspiration you give us all.
I did a lot of online searching – but based on our size of group, the search narrowed pretty quickly. VRBO and air bnb is a good place to start. Love the cookie name suggestion!
“Patchwork” cookies
I want to do more spending time with Jesus and less busy work.
Love your genuineness, Mel. I’ve used more of your recipes this summer than anything else:). You’re a great cook, a great wife and great mom:)
Cutest name! Thanks, Laurie! And your answer is the best. The best.
“For Good Measure” cookie!
Love that name suggestion!
I want to do more “getting it done” and less “we’re gonna”!
Yes, me too!
Cookie name: Everything But the Kitchen Sink
I think that’s going to be the winner! A lot of you guys think on the same wavelength! 🙂
I love the name , but I have cookbooks with cookie recipes that already have the Everything but the Kitchen Sink cookies name ! Same with Fibber McGee cookies! Hardly anyone keeps recipe books since you can find anything on social media, but I still do!
I am not good with naming things, but maybe something like “Hidden Treasure” cookies , they could finish out a Pirate theme for kids!
Yes, I already know cookies by that name.
Ahh…Mel…these Friday Thoughts posts are great! I would fill in the blank with I’d like to do more letting go and less holding on. And I would love to see more Bake With Mel videos on your blog, just saying. For the name the new cookie, all I can think of is “Chaos” cookies because that’s what they look like to me…..beautiful chaos!
I played pickle ball this summer for the first time and it was so much fun. We decided to make it a bit more aerobic and play up and down 3 courts. We were all worn out by the end but laughing so hard.
Thanks for all your thoughts. I have a lot to work on as far as my own anxieties. I get so concerned about what others think (mostly about me) that I don’t do things that I would really love to do. I also spend a lot of time comparing myself to others and I would love to just be able to find out and be who I am. I’ve been reading Daring greatly by Brenne Brown and it is helping me think through a lot of things.
You are amazing! So grateful for the space you have here and how much it blesses my life!
Haha, that made me laugh out loud about the three court playing, Deanna! Also makes me tired just thinking about it! I loved that book by Brene Brown. It offered so much clarity – for me the trick is putting it all into action. Good luck! Half the battle is just recognizing what needs to change. I can tell you are intentional and amazing – you’ve got this!
Thank you, Vicki! I have some Bake with Mel videos in the works once summer dies down and we get back to a normal schedule! I’m glad you enjoy them. Thanks for letting me know that. I think chaos cookies are so fitting!
I want to be more active and spend less time watching TV. I want to do less worrying and more living in the moment. Love your Friday posts. The recipe posts are great too, but I like reading about your kids and what they’re up to. I just ordered the card game on Amazon. Thanks for the game suggestions, and hurry up with the cookie recipe! It looks like an Everything Cookie.
Great responses, Teresa! I am just loving reading what all of you have to say! It is the best way to spend my Friday night and I’m not even kidding. Cookie coming next week! Promise!
Thanks for the update! I added Play Nine to my amazon wish list. Love reading about the fun ideas you had for the family reunion- though a little shocked that you guys do it every year . But is this just his parents and all his siblings or is it bigger than that?
I love to do less screen time- email, social media- and more quality time with my kids. I feel the years are slipping away far too quickly.
Enjoy what’s left of your summer!
That was my error in the post, Jennette. It’s every other year. 🙂 It’s Brian’s parents, all his siblings and all their kiddos.
Pretty sure I’m not the only one who had this name for the cookies, but I’ll say it anyway: “Kitchen Sink” (as in everything but…).
I want to be more mindful/in the moment and less distracted/worried about future stuff.
Great Friday post, thanks for sharing. Have a great rest o’ the summer!
Yep, that’s a popular name suggestion but I love it. Very fitting! Thank you for your comment, Lee!
What an awesome family reunion! Can’t say my family has ever done one, so when I hear of others who do (and 48 people under one giant roof?? I can’t even imagine!) it’s pretty impressive to me.
And yay for your boys and their entrepreneurial jobs! If no one has told you lately, you and your hubby are awesome parents for teaching your kids the value of work. Seriously, good job to you both!
I actually have Play Nine in my game closet and have never played it once. Totally going to pull it out! Also, have you ever played Tiki Tumble? Such a fun one; quick, for 2+ players, and especially awesome if you play the music from Disneyland’s Tiki Room in the background while playing. 😉
For my fill in the blanks: I want to do more utilizing my time better and less where did the time go today. I want to do more connected mom and less stressed mom. I want to do more intentional wife and less coasting-along wife.
Remember, no judging here! 🙂 You are the sweetest – I’ve been questioning some parenting decisions lately. It’s been a rough couple weeks for us in that way. I do love seeing my kids develop an hard working/resilient/creative spirit and I’m hoping the summer work helps them with that. Get out that Play Nine game! It’s so fun! Based on your recommendation and a couple others, looks like I’m going to have to order that Tiki Tumble game. It doesn’t take a lot of convincing for me to get a new game. 🙂 Thanks for your comment/responses to filling in the blanks. I could give an amen to all of it.
I’m thinking you should call them road trip cookies. Mostly because the tops of them look like the floor of my car after a road trip. It has a ring to it and I think anyone with children can relate!
Love the info about the family reunion. I’m curious about the 9 square game. I’ve never seen anything like it but it looks fun. What is it?
My fill in the blank would be
I want to do more doing and less thinking.
Haha. Hilarious road trip name but so true! The 9 square game is a bunch of connected PVC pieces and you hit a ball over into each others’ squares like volleyball (you’re out if you hit it twice or it goes out of the full 9 square “arena” – the person in the middle is the king and they stay in until someone gets them out. You rotate in a spiral to the king spot. That’s probably confusing explanation so let me know if you have other questions. 🙂
Do you make your kids get jobs or have they done it on their own? I’m REALLY struggling with this with my almost 14-year-old. He says he wants to earn money to buy a new mountain bike, but he spends all of his time looking at bikes and none of it working to earn the money. It’s so so frustrating to me! I’ve brainstormed ideas with him, but he takes no initiative to actually do the work. I had a job when I was 12, so it’s super hard for me to see him not doing anything! I love the cookie dough idea! Have you had issues with your son not having a food handlers permit (or does he)? I think this is something my son would do!
Oh, and I want to do more loving and less criticizing (see above….).
Hey Diane – I hear you on the kids working thing. We haven’t had to deal with the food handlers permit thing yet but it’s probably something I should check into. He’s only selling to close family and friends (not going door to door) so it hasn’t been an issue yet. Both my husband and I worked as teenagers and we’ve set the same expectations for our kids. We sit down with them and outline the expenses they need to pay for (it’s kind of a sliding scale…as they get older, they help pay for more of their personal things) and how much money they should save for college/church mission service. And then we kind of work backwards and say “so if this is how much you need saved by this certain age, this is about how much you should save every summer” – it’s not a straight equation. Obviously my 12 year old isn’t going to work as many hours or get great jobs like a 16 year old can. But we really champion the work aspect – we spend hours helping them brainstorm work ideas (especially entrepreneurial ideas) and help them execute those while still making sure they retain a lot of responsibility. We’ve kind of set the expectation that during the summer break at 13, they should be doing something productive/work related for 4-5 hours a week, at 14, it should be a few more hours a week (maybe 6-8), and so on. So by the time they are 16, they can visualize working full time in the summer and not have a heart attack. All of my kids have been pretty motivated to earn money because they have certain things they want to save up for that we don’t buy for them (kind of like the mountain bike thing with your son)…but we also get a lot of complaining on certain days or insistence that none of their friends have to work, etc. Basically, it’s not always smooth sailing and angels singing. I’ve gotten criticism from other parents at times that I should just let my kids be kids and that we are expecting too much of them. Maybe we are? But they still have a lot, a lot of time to just be kids! I can very heartily agree that my teenagers are very much like your son in that they don’t take a lot of initiative on their own without some serious encouragement, so don’t be too hard on yourself (or your son!). Good luck!
I love reading through these Friday thoughts! It is always fun to hear about what is going on in your life.
I want to do more loving and less judging. Many times I am too quick to judge others around me and I actually feel like this has been more harmful for me than for them. I just want to be more understanding of others and try to know them better.
I also want to do more pondering and less complaining. While I feel that a good, healthy vent is great sometimes, complaining about the hard things in life over and over again doesn’t seem to improve my outlook on the hard situations that I face. I need to be a little more careful and thoughtful in this area of my life.
I also want to live a bit more and dream a bit less. Just want to appreciate the day to day with those I love. ❤
Summer has been fun for out family this year. One of the highlights for me was watching my kids have a bake sale to raise money for a children’s hospital. Your over night sweet rolls were included in the line up here and it was a great success.
I read the book that you suggested about parenting, “How to Be a Happier Parent,” and absolutely loved it.
Thanks for all your work in bringing such delicious food to us and for sharing your life. It has definitely made a difference in mine in such a positive way.
I loved and appreciated that response, Sara. I could do with loving more and judging less, too. Thank you for being so heartfelt in your responses. And that is so amazing about the bake sale your kids did to raise money. So amazing!
I truly love your Friday posts. I am totally stealing the fill in the blank idea. Mine is “Today I want to do more smiling and less complaining.” We are in El Paso, TX and our house does not have traditional A/C (we do have a cooling system but once the temp hit 95+ outside it just can’t keep up–leaving my home at 80 degrees) so I have been complaining and ornery all the time. I complain about cooking, sweating, sitting, feeling yucky and frankly I don’t think anyone wants to be around me. LOL. So, today I will complain about it less.
I tell my husband I have reverse seasonal depression–like when it gets hot I turn into a total psychotic mess. Here’s to a temperature drop this week! I can do it!
Also, your instant pot recipes and grill recipes have SAVED me this summer! And that quilt is to die for!
Oh, girl, I actually think you can complain about that heat all you want! You are amazing! I think I’d be a grump, too. Don’t be too hard on yourself. I’ll pray for a temp drop for you, too!
The first thought was, “I hope they are wearing sunscreen.” I love that your boys are learning to set goals and work toward those. Are they still selling flags too?
I have never heard of pickle ball, so I need to learn more. Also, I will definitely order that card game. We have found so many games from your posts. Thank you.
That is one extreme cookie.
Our public schools start in 2 weeks; we start our homeschooling in 3 weeks. Time to finish our projects.
That quilt is gorgeous. I can’t sew but appreciate the skill and time involved. That should be an heirloom for your boys.
I would like to do less texting and more picking up the phone to hear a friend’s voice. I would like to worry less about getting certain household things done and more about making time for me to exercise.
Oh yes! Sunscreen always! 🙂 Yes, we still have a bunch of flags in our bonus room and so that’s a side hustle for them, too. Whenever they are short on cash but want to buy something for themselves, we gently remind them of all the flags in bins up there and they are welcome to sell as many as they can! 🙂 Best of luck as you embark on another homeschooling season!
Cookie names: the works cookies, everything but the kitchen sink cookies, cookiepalooza,
The cookie that has it all, couldn’t decide cookies, omnicookies, Fantasia cookies. Stretchy pants cookies 🙂
Stretchy pants cookies 😉
Hahaha. Stretchy pants cookies. I’ll be giggling about that one for a while.
I want to do more enjoying and less worrying. Cookie name suggestion: the first thing that came to mind was cowabunga cookies.
Love your posts, Mel. Always a great way to start my day!
My summer has been a mixed bag—sold our home (we were only there 9 months), road tripped from Texas to ND with stops in AZ, UT, CO, WY, and MT. Cut short our stay with son and returned to AZ where we purchased a home. Always great to be around grandkids and family.
The hard part is unpacking and organizing in a new location. Love our new community! I’m anxious to start sewing/quilting again and once I replenish the pantry and it cools off, to get back to baking.
PS—I’ve not played pickle ball so you’re not the last person. LOL!
Oh man, Janie – you’ve had quite the summer already! It is definitely challenging getting settled in a new community. Good luck to you!
Really enjoy you and your blog. We are selling our home in MT and relocating to a warmer, sunnier and less expensive cost of living in WA. I have really struggled since May with doing it all while my husband is working in Washington. I have had a lot of revelations about myself and our marriage and my mothering insecurities and how I don’t react well to life stressors. My children have carried the brunt of my overwhelming frustration and anger. It hasn’t been pretty.
I would like to do more real friendships, and living, believing, and willingly accepting what God says about me and less feeling insignificant , critical , and hiding because I believe I deserve that.
Thanks for sharing your life in post, Mel and Happy Summer!
Wow! Moving is no joke but doing it alone while your husband is working elsewhere poses some serious challenges. I’m sure it’s been hard having those revelations kind of all hit you at such a vulnerable time. I hope you are able to sort through those difficult feelings and figure out maybe what could change for the better?? You are amazing…good luck with all you have on your plate!
KKK – Kitchen Kounter (or Kupboard) Kookies
Look wonderful. Cannot wait for the recipe. If we lived closer I would totally buy some of those dough balls from the kids too!
I just don’t know how you do all that you do. I feel like I am on top of it and organized with work, kids, ranch etc and you blow me out of the water.
You go Girl!
I’m so impressed with your reunion planning! It makes me so happy (and envious) that your family can enjoy your talents. I’ve planned a few reunions for my family and in-laws and while I enjoy it, the aftermath of adult feelings is the most work for me. Your section on boundaries and responsibly for others’ feelings is so important and something I have to work at every day. Cheers to you, and much love.
Jlilly – that was a difficult part of the reunion for me as well, so I totally understand. It was actually a tender mercy that I started doing some work on boundaries/managing emotions before the reunion. It helped the entire experience end on a high note instead of me being stressed out of my mind. I have to work at it every day, too.
Oh trust me, Abby – it’s not all organization and roses over here. Haha. Totally real life (lots of tears and stress this week and seems like everything is falling through the cracks but next will be better, right?).
Mel, I love your Friday thoughts posts!
#1 – We are going to have to check out Play Nine. We took Bold and 3Up3Down to a mini-family reunion last week (both recommendations from your holiday gift guides, I think), and they were a huge hit! My husband has started pulling out a game most nights after dinner lately, and it’s amazing what a quick game can do to help chill everyone out a bit at the end of the day. The witching hour of dinner prep is past, but bedtime looms large, and at that time of day, my no-longer-napping-2YO can. Not. Handle. His. Life.
#2 – I love the suggestion one of the other readers had to call the cookies “Candy Aisle Cookies.” That seems fitting! They look delicious.
#5 – I have just recently been able to get back to sewing and helped my sister use a longarm machine to quilt two quilts when she and her family were visiting our family. Quilting is so fun and so maddening, so relaxing and so stressful, and so expensive… but really, it is the best to snuggle up under a quilt that you have made, start to finish. Have you used minky as the backing on any of your quilts? Talk about leveling up the cozy factor!!
#6 – We recently discovered a pickleball court a mile from our new house and we are really intrigued. It looks really fun, and more manageable for my younger kids than tennis. So, nope! You are not the last person on Earth to play pickleball, but I might be.
#7 – Today, I want to spend more time playing with my kids and less time cleaning the house. Summer cleaning is so… blah. Well, really, all-the-time cleaning is so blah. But it somehow seems to need more effort in the summer because everything is so much less scheduled than during the school year. Also, in response your first less/more statement, I have been listening to Jody Moore a lot lately — have you heard of her? She has a podcast that is wonderful! In the last episode I listened to, she talked about family reunions and our expectations concerning them. She says so many wise things, I can’t even begin to list them. You should check her out if you aren’t already a listener!
Haha, I totally laughed at the end of your #1. I can relate to your 2 year old. I can barely handle my life at that time of day either. Ha. Candy Aisle cookies IS a great name! I love it! I haven’t used minky but my mom has made my kids a couple pillowcases with that fabric and yes, so, so warm and comforting! But I also agree, dang, quilting is expensive! You are so lucky to have a pickleball court so close! Go play! Honestly, it has been fun for our whole family. I hope you were able to get out and do some playing today because you are right: DOWN WITH SUMMER CLEANING. Ugh. I have listened to a few of Jody Moore’s podcasts. But I need to get back on that!
I can’t wait to try out your cookie! My name suggestion is CHAOS!
I think it’s so awesome that this name has been suggested by a few others. I love it!
Boundaries for people we love is so hard!! I am not very good at it myself ! I pray that you will be Blessed with strength and knowledge to create boundaries that are best for you!! After I looked at the delicious ingredients in this unnamed cookie, my first thought was “gimme that now!” So how about “Gimme Cookies”?
I so enjoy your posts and love your recipes!
I want to do more de-cluttering and less “piddling”. I want to spend more time with my beautiful 82 yr old Mother and less time doing things for others. I want to do more focusing on what is important for me and less focusing on what is important to others.
Thank you, Veronica! I love that cookie name suggestion! And I really, really loved your fill in the blank suggestions. I think we all have a lot of things we can actively and patiently work on, and that is a great thing.
Love your Friday thoughts posts. I want to do more living in the moment and less borrowing trouble from worrying about the future and things I don’t even have control over. It’s some thing I’ve struggled a lot with but I’ve been making progress. And you will too! Whatever your goals-just remember the small steps you take every day do really add up over time
“borrowing trouble” – that resonated with me! And also the statement about it all adding up over time. Thank you!
The cookies sound amazing. Also, my husband is really into pickleball; he is playing at Nationals in November. He also sells paddles, balls, and portable pickleball nets that you can set up anywhere. There are two websites: https://crazy4pickleball.com and his ebay store is https://www.ebay.com/str/crazy4pickleball.
For goodness sake, good luck to your husband. That is amazing! Thanks for sharing those resources! (I didn’t see the portable pickle ball nets on the website, though…am I missing them somehow?)
I’m so glad you loved the lodge! My kids look forward to it every time we go. My answer would be: I want to do more enjoying the present and less panicking about future possibilities. I love these posts! Thank you for starting this conversation, it really has me thinking.
It was amazing, Bonnie! Thanks for telling me about it!
Your cookies look fabulous. I am at our cottage by the Chesapeake Bay in Virginia and they remind me of my walk just a few minutes ago…I saw sand (cookie), driftwood (pretzels) and sea glass (m&ms). I see all of these in your cookie.
Cookie name : By the Sea
So proud of your boys working hard to help fund their trip. Great job mom and dad.
What a great cookie name (and what a beautiful walk by the sounds of it!)
Congrats on the successful reunion! We just got back from a big, lovely family reunion and my thoughts were—whew, I’m so glad I didn’t have to plan that! So big kudos!
And those cookie…they sure look like “cookie crack” to me. So good you could get arrested!
Haha…and my thoughts were “I’m so glad I don’t have to plan this again for a REALLY long time!”
Cookie Name: Bottom of mom’s purse cookies
Haha. Good one!
This summer has been insane for us too. We were Ma and Pa for trek, then my sister got married the next weekend, then celebrating my hubby’s birthday in bear lake the next, then 4th of July and my baby turned 3, then my oldest got her tonsils out, and my son got strep or scarlet fever the same week, and next week I go to stake girls camp where I’m in charge of the craft for 350 people. So I want more playing with my kids, and less obligations. But it’s been good. Just ready for a break! Your family reunion sounds awesome, we’re doing one up in Washington next summer, so I’ll be sharing your ideas!!
Ashlee – what a busy summer! I can’t believe it. I hope you are hanging in there…that sounds insane. And I kind of want to cry for you. But I hope you really do get to playing more and ridding yourself of a few obligations (or at least getting them over with). You are amazing!
I just ordered Play Nine (even though I told my husband I was done shopping after buying both a Bosch mixer and an ice cream compressor this week!) You’ve never steered me wrong in the game category. One game we are loving that I don’t remember ever seeing on your blog is Skyjo. It’s a very fun card game for as little as 2 or up to 8 people and easy to learn. I love these kind of posts from you and I’m saving this one for the inevitable day when I have to plan a reunion!
A Bosch and an ice cream compressor! Life is surely complete! 🙂 Thanks for the game recommendation, too!
I highly recommend a card game called The Mind. It is so simple and so fun! When you master it, try playing it without talking–so funny!
I also highly recommend books by Brene Brown! They could help you in your search for setting boundaries.
My fill in the blank would be: I want to care more about what God thinks of me and less of what others/the world thinks of me.
Thanks for the game recommendation, Melissa!! And I have really enjoyed a few of Brene Brown’s books so I second that. Your fill in the blank answer was a wonderful reminder to me. Thank you!
I’m so happy to hear that you are quilting! I love your blog, and my kids will eat things they normally won’t try if they know it is your recipe. It is nice to hear you found the best hobby on earth! You can indulge in a creative outlet AND have an awesome gift to give someone! It is addicting, and fabric shopping is a hobby of its own. The flag quilt is moderately ambitious for a beginner and it looks great! Keep it up! I bet you would like some of the patterns by Then Came June, or Suzy Quilts.
Thanks, Holly! I’ll look into those patterns for sure!
I want to do less comparing myself to/coveting others’ professional accomplishments, and more focusing on/appreciating what I have accomplished in my career 🙂
Yes, Anna! Such a great response.
I want to do more ENJOYING and less STRIVING. I am definitely a Martha vs a Mary, and I am realizing more and more that I am missing out on the opportunities throughout my day to simple sit and enjoy God’s creation – whether that is by reading a book, having coffee with a friend, or simply sitting. Less doing, more appreciating. 🙂
Love your updates (and you!) so much. I can identify with your comments about the daily anxieties. I think you will find the more you are willing to be open about it, the more you will hear SO MANY voices responding with, “Me too! I thought it was just me!” I don’t know how something that so many of us struggle with is still such a private and off-limits topic. 🙂
I think is “off limits” because we don’t want to share our weaknesses. But you are right, the more open we are, the more we can help each other 🙂
I was thinking about Martha vs Mary the other day, too, and wondering how I could make some needed changes in my life related to that, so when you mentioned it, I was like, yes! I get that for sure. Thanks for your comment, Gwen!
Those cookies remind me of the bottom of my kids backpack and you probably need a backpack to carry all the ingredients.
So why not backpack cookie.
I love the name Backpack Cookie
Great name suggestion, Zed!
I suggest ‘Sinful Indulgence’ or ‘Sinful Peanuty Indulgence’ which my spell check doesn’t like, but does indicate the danger if people are allergic to peanuts or even ‘PB indulgence’. This is definitely an everything cookie and an indulgence.
So glad you had such a wonderful reunion, pat yourself on the back for your good planning.
I think for me the sentence should be ‘I want to be more productive and do less idling’ or ‘I want to be more aware of others and less introspective’ or maybe ‘I want to do less reading and more housework and crafts’.
You pose interesting questions and topics. Thanks for sharing your life with us. As you work on boundaries, remember that taking care of yourself is important for all the people around you as well. For one thing it sets a good example for your children. (grin) Also, a phrase by Lord Peter Wimsey from the mystery ‘Thrones and Dominations’ seems to contain a lot of wisdom for me. To paraphrase it since the book isn’t in front of me: There is what we can do for any child of ours, and what no one can do for any child.
We may love our children dearly, but they must still learn to cope with the world and while we are not facing WWII it is still a scary world in many ways. Learning to deal with their emotions and handling their disappointments is part of growing up. You seem to be doing a good job of teaching your kids important lessons such as earning the money they need for camp, etc. Don’t be too hard on yourself, Mel.
Thanks for the name suggestion, Alice! I liked your fill in the blank responses! I could say yes to all of them, too. Thank you for sharing that about raising and doing for children in your last paragraphs. It is so true and a good reminder. Thank you, Alice.
Mel, Have you thought about naming them “candy aisle cookies”?
Thank you for your honesty and tips, I love these Friday Thoughts posts! Love the ideas of the baby pictures for the reunion and the bobble-head skit! I bet you all made tons of memories. Here’s to a good rest of the summer for you and your family!
I want to do more listening and less talking. That’s always a work in progress for me 🙂
It’s a great name, Molly! Thanks for your comment!
#2: Faceplant worthy! These look pretty epic (in the sense how can one capture such gloriousness ) so I’d vote to incorporate a memory of your cousin’s wedding (or any of the other times you’ve made it) into the name – that way it’d be super unique on Pinterest and have a sweet story attached to it!
#7 One of the most LIFE CHANGING books I’ve ever read is “Boundaries: When to Say Yes and How to Say No To Take Control of Your Life”. Seriously Mel – life changing! It teaches you how to set healthy, BIBLICAL boundaries “with your spouse, children, friends, parents, co-workers, and even yourself”. I was going to write my experience here but I feel like a short summary wouldn’t do it justice, and I especially love the fact that it is faith-based. If you don’t have time to sit down and read it, get the audible version pretty please with a MKC sugar cookie on top!
Here is the link: https://www.amazon.com/gp/aw/d/0310351804/ref=dp_ob_neva_mobile
That sounds amazing, Anna! I’m definitely going to look into this. Thanks for sharing!
I second the “Boundaries” book mentioned above! The authors are Cloud and Townsend.
We’ve been living in eastern Europe for the past year and a half, and will be moving back to the US in September. Our summer has been busy with travel and visitors. We are at the tail end of our final temple visit in Helsinki. We are in the Helsinki temple district and come stay for the better part of a week every few of months. We will enjoy being closer to a temple, but will really miss the more focused experience of several days of temple worship at once.
While we’ve been in eastern Europe, I’ve learned quite a bit about the enneagram, which is a personality framework. It has been extremely helpful I’m showing me where my boundaries need work. I feel like I’ve made great boundary progress over the past year or so! (Though I think it will always be a work in progress.)
To answer your phrase, I want to do more joyful movement and less waiting until I feel perfectly energized. I also want to do more sleeping and less tossing and turning. Maybe the second will help the first.
I was about to say the same thing! I LOVE that Boundaries book. I don’t mean to sound dramatic, but it was life-changing!
Thank you for the book suggestion, Anna! Really, thank you! I’ll be looking into it (especially with that cute little plea!). Haha. 🙂
Mel, I really love you a lot. Pretty sure you posted this in the middle of the night which makes me feel so kindred-spiritish as I myself am awake at unholy:hour MST.
So proud of your entrepreneurial 12-year-old! If I was in the vicinity I’d definitely take him up on that. I am WAAAY more in support of homemade Mel cookie dough than that ultra-greasy frozen stuff the soccer kids used to sell. Blegh.
Boundaries are so hard. I envy people whose well being, stability, and life rhythm is completely independent of those around them. Mine seems to often get tangled up in a lot of things that I don’t have control over. (Can we start an online therapy group for kindred control freaks?) Are you familiar with codependency? SUCH a fascinating (and sometimes depressing when you’re neck-deep in it) thing to learn about: this idea that codependency–shielding or trying to protect others from negative feelings or particularly consequences–is Satan’s counterfeit to charity. (Mind blown emoji) I could talk more about this, and for the billionth time I’m wishing we were real neighbors really chatting on the front porch, but for now I’ll just say, you’re doing great. Pursuing boundaries is well worth the effort. Love to you, Mel. (ALSO, I recommend the BYU devotional “100% responsible” by Lynn G. Robbins. AMAZING.)
Our summer started with a very sudden move from Texas to Utah. A much needed job-change with a very convenient return to family. 🙂 The rest has been a blur of either moving busyness and extended family fun, or sitting blank-faced (or more honestly, probably scrolling Instagram) wondering who I am, how I got here, and how the blazes to go about establishing a new routine for my 6-, 4-, and 2-year-olds. I’m trying to take it one day a time, celebrate the days where it all works, take a deep breath and let go of days that don’t, and intentionally give myself space to mentally and emotionally adjust to our new life.
So for today, I’ll say,
I want to do more walking and less sitting. I want to do more work and less idling. I want to do more allowing and less forcing. I want to do more chill-faced-mom and less stress-faced-mom.
Love you, Mel. Thanks for sharing yourself with us on the big world wide web, you brave soul!
I will second the BYU devotional by Lynn G. Robbins!
https://speeches.byu.edu/talks/lynn-g-robbins_be-100-percent-responsible/
I second the “more allowing and less forcing” with my 8, 6, 4, and 1 1/2 years olds as well. Working on that daily.
Thank you Emily and Meridith!
I’m envious of those people, too, Annie – and yet sometimes I feel like I still want to feel a lot of feelings and help a lot of people and how do I separate all of that, you know? Lots of good suggestions in this comment thread, though. But I have thought a lot about how I can still find ways to disconnect from my kids’ emotionality and still be a good, connected mom. Does that make sense? I think it relates to what you said about co dependency and something I need to continue to work on and learn more about. Thanks for the talk suggestion! Good luck with that huge new life change, my friend. That is not easy and I agree, when we’ve gone through it, I feel very dazed and confused for a long time. Sounds like you are doing a great job at taking it one day at a time. Thank you for your fill in the blank responses! Yes to being a more chill faced mom.
“I want to do more ACCEPTING and less COMPLAINING.”….this is so difficult!:) I guess I like to ‘run the show’ and have things done my way (the RIGHT way, obviously!). It’s been hard work for me to back off some and just accept. For me, this is mostly related to household organization.
Oh I hear you, Sandra! I feel the same way. I am trying to back off, too. Good luck!