Friday Thoughts: Currently
Hi, friends. How are you? I’ve been off the grid for a while (I’ll explain more below), which is why there has been a short break from recipes. But I have been anxious to check in with a Friday Thoughts post! I LOVE connecting with you in the comment threads of these posts, and with so, so much going on right now for all of us, it’s time to have a friend therapy session together, wouldn’t you say?
Today, for this Friday Thoughts post, I’m sharing what I’m up to currently (both physically and mentally). And then it’s your turn to tell me what your “current” status is!
1) Currently eating all the things.
It took a good six weeks but I finally fully healed from the gum graft surgery that kind of rocked my world. Because the surgery involved slicing the roof of my mouth to extract the tissue used for the gum graft on my front lower teeth, the healing process took a bit longer, and I was only tentatively eating soft foods at week four (I also had a few issues with parts of the graft slipping so I was on extra strict orders).
However by week six, everything had healed, and I’ve been well on my way to making up for all the lost eating time since then.
Mostly, chips.
I pray mightily I never, ever have to have that surgery again. So much compassion and respect for those of you that have had it multiple times! It was not a pleasant experience for me. Now I’m prepping to get a crown redone as a result of the domino effect that is dental work.
2) Currently listening to a lot of audiobooks.
Right now, I’m halfway through The Bear and the Nightingale by Katherine Arden; the storytelling is captivating. I just finished Just Mercy by Bryan Stevenson and have enjoyed talking about it and processing it with Brian and my kids who also read it (we’re watching the movie this weekend), and The Boys in the Boat by Daniel James Brown is next.
Any favorite audiobooks to share?
3) Currently spending a lot of time with our quarantine-acquired, new-ish kunekune pigs.
I share more details about them on my @melsfauxfarm account, but they have been a fun addition to whatever you call the random hybrid lifestyle of country and suburbia we have going on.
Also, I’ve never scratched so many piggy bellies in my life. If you can’t find me, I am 100% most likely out in the pig pasture, which has become my favorite, peaceful place in all the world (except if the pigs are hungry, and then watch out) and best way to detox from the day (and chaos of the world as of late). Highly recommend kunekune pigs to all the world.
As a sidenote: we have four purebred, registered kunes. Two girls/gilts: Olivia and EmmyLou. Two boys/boars: Benny and Eddie. Three of my kids invested money from their savings in these pigs as breeding pairs. So, next year some time, we will probably be swimming in adorable piglets for sale. (Kunes are raised for breeding and meat.) They are friendly, gentle, *mostly* non-rooting and non-wallowing pigs that eat our pasture grass and make us very happy.
4) Currently hoarding all the huckleberries while enjoying short hair again.
I dragged the kids up to pick our annual supply of huckleberries (the last few years we’ve picked near McCall, Idaho, but don’t ask me where we go specifically, because if you huckleberry regularly, you know revealing your secret spot is an unpardonable sin). We pick them solely to make huckleberry milkshakes all year long.
Huckleberries are the best, and I missed them every single day of every single year we lived in the midwest. Also, I got eight inches cut off of all of my hairs, and I feel like a new woman (especially now that it has grown a few weeks and is *just* long enough to fit in a ponytail again).
4) Currently gathering books to donate to our middle school and elementary school libraries.
In a small effort to involve my kids in affecting change for racial equality and justice in our own community, we decided to research, gather, and donate 40-50 books to both the middle school and elementary school libraries.
Books that promote, champion, and highlight diversity, black lives, and racial issues and equality. We’ve been working with both school librarians to figure out what books they already have in their libraries. Thanks to a well-stocked middle school library, we’ve expanded the middle school list to include a few other books that champion diversity in other marginalized groups as well.
Photo credit: Jane Mount
If you’re interested in the full list of books, here you go. (Disclaimer: I haven’t read every single book on this list; use your own discretion if checking these out for you or your child.)
We are trying to source and purchase most of the books from independent and/or black-owned book sellers across the country, and hopefully, we’ll be able to get them to the school libraries ASAP. It has been a fun and rewarding project to work on together.
My secondary goal is to also get these books circulated among individual classrooms and also volunteer in the elementary school to highlight and read these books in the library and classrooms so these books don’t get forgotten on the shelves – all of this is dependent on how school will look this year due to covid, but we’ll take it one step at a time.
5) Currently learning that my anxiety is at an all-time high.
It’s been a weird, hard, rough, enlightening, chaotic, frustrating, stressful six months for me. The uncertainty of everything has me feeling stretched very thin, and I’ve had to dig deep for coping skills that I haven’t had to use in a while. I wish I had the answers and all the solutions and, mostly, A Detailed Future Plan to Write Firmly in a Spreadsheet and Follow Daily.
I don’t have any of that, dang it. But I just want to say that if you are feeling like some days you are drowning in all of the noise and chaos and uncertainty and hypocrisy (on every side) and fear and stress and judgment, you aren’t alone.
As someone who has googled “am I having a panic attack?” more than once in the last few months, I can also personally attest that there’s a lot of peace and happiness out there, too. It actually hasn’t gone anywhere, it’s just been pushed and nudged aside by the louder, dominating, noisy voices.
I’m learning that for me, one of the keys to finding my inner peace and resilience again is to disconnect. From social media, the internet, and technology in general. (And even from real life people who tend to bring me down.) It’s an almost instantaneous, shoulder-relaxing effect when I log off everything. And I’ve learned that, guess what, I actually don’t miss that much when I’m not checking Instagram daily.
And then once I disconnect, I try to simultaneously connect with what I already intrinsically know brings a longer-lasting peace: God, my family (like, really connecting with them one on one), the outdoors, and sometime just being alone if I can manage it.
As a verified introvert, I’ve been challenged big time since March. Listen, I love my kids and husband. They’re great. I want to live with them forever. And I genuinely would choose family time over just about anything else (as in, family night out over girls’ night out any day of the week). But all disclaimers aside, I am mentally rejuvenated when I have a degree of quiet alone time. And that has been noticeably absent the last little while especially since I’m in the parenting phase of early rising kids (who are too old to take naps) and late bedtime teenagers. {Admittedly, the aforementioned quiet pig pasture has helped with this introvert initiative a bit even if a kid, or two, tags along sometimes.}
It’s a process and a cycle – this disconnecting and connecting thing – and definitely not a one time thing. It’d probably be better if I could just learn to balance it all on the daily, but I don’t do that very well, so when I reach my peak, I just disconnect, restabilize, and move on. It’s meant I’ve been a little hit and miss here on the blog and on social media this year. Quality over quantity, right? 🙂
What coping skills are working for you right now?
Edited to ask: if you have kids at home, what are your school plans for fall?? The school year here was slated to start this coming Monday but it has been delayed until September 8. At this point I’m planning to send my kids back to school (although it’s doubtful they’ll be *at* school very often, if at all, based on our #’s and the district’s plan to keep them home if we are in the yellow or red zone).
6) Currently traveling across the wilds of Northern Idaho and Montana in Thor, the behemoth RV we rented on rvshare.com (not sponsored).
It was a whim of an idea. With so many of our other plans canceled this spring and summer, the normally unimpulsive Brian-Mel pair looked at each other a couple weeks ago and decided on the spot to rent an RV and drive around with the family, self-contained and fancy free.
It has been dreamy so far (except for when the concentrated family time has proven a bit too much – and also, I’ve learned which of my children have a serious stinky feet problem).
Most of the time we’ve been without cell service in places where beauty and hygiene standards are wonderfully, acceptably low. And we’ve done a mix of dry camping (no hook ups) and RV park glamping (full hook ups). Hi, lukewarm shower, I’ve missed you.
We left with a general idea of where we wanted to go and what we wanted to do with all the flexibility of changing those plans at any minute thanks to driving a creaky house on wheels.
So far we’ve been up by Redfish Lake near Stanley, Idaho (which now ranks as one of our favorite places in Idaho), Cour d’ Alene (the most gorgeous place on earth), and we rode the Hiawatha Trail yesterday on our bikes (a bucket list item we have now checked off and hope to do many times in the future – AMAZING).
We’ll have to get back to real life eventually, but I highly recommend the RV adventure-on-a-whim experience for regenerating good family vibes, forcing a break from technology and the chaos of the world right now, and showing your kids, especially The Teenagers you are still grand master of all.the.card.games and corn hole.
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Ok, this was a long one. I have a lot more to say, but I’ll let you get on with your life. Ha. Remind me to tell you about our dusty living room/kitchen remodel, my new favorite pants (and the shoes I’ve been living in all summer), a cookbook idea and question, and a few other things!
Love your guts. Thanks for being here. And don’t leave me alone in the comments! I want to hear about YOU and how you are doing.
Love your spirit, love reading about your pigs, etc. More importantly… were you aware Jennifer Garner has used a recipe of yours??
I saw that too! It was her pretzel recipe.
Haha, yes, I think that was a few months back, but I was pretty flabbergasted!
PS – I actually came here today to look up your lemon bars recipe, my son picked that for this first week’s cooking class. There will be several of your recipes included in our family cookbook – I hope that’s okay! I will credit you, of course. These are recipes I use and love and want my kids to take with them into their future families. Thank you for sharing them with us.
Family cookbooks are the best!
I so hear you about alone time. Like you, I love, love my kids and husband, but having them ALL with me, ALL the time is exhausting for me. Being in quarantine made me realize something about myself that I didn’t know: I like being alone. Not all the time, but definitely for a little while each day. When I don’t have that time, I get a little (sometimes a lot) ornery. I’ve learned that finding even just a few minutes can work wonders for my sanity.
I feel like I could have written this comment and signed it as myself. Amen, sister. A hundred amens.
My husband and I have picked huckleberries in Idaho and we were just talking about going back to do it again (we live in AZ) – I don’t think we’ll get there for that anytime soon but maybe we’ll finally get to Yellowstone this fall. We lived in Rexburg for 2.5 years and were always too busy and too poor to take that short trip, so it’s still on our bucket list.
For school, we are doing Prenda – it’s kind of a hybrid between online school and old-fashioned (but kid-led) homeschooling + collaborating with other families. We’ve been doing it for almost 2 years and we LOVE it. Prendaschool.com, look it up (seriously!) – it’s available everywhere now and it’s awesome. We are starting tomorrow. I decided that this year one of our activities will be a cooking class, where the kids take turns picking what family favorite recipe to make, we (they) learn how to make it together, I take pictures, and then we compile the recipes and pictures into a family cook book at the end of the year. I’m kind of ridiculously excited about it. We may add in some art work from our art projects too. I wasn’t planning on homeschooling so many kids this year (Prenda in AZ has a microschool option too and my girls have been begging to do that, but it didn’t work out), but now that I will have 4 school kids home I’m getting really excited about the possibilities.
I am so not jealous about that skin graft stuff. I will have to do that sometime in my life and I’m pretty sure I will put it off as long as possible because my husband had it done and it was HORRIBLE. Maybe someday I’ll get up the guts for it. For now I will continue pretending I don’t need it and counting my lucky stars that I have a 3-month-old who needs me to be eating real food so I can have milk for her.
That road trip (bike trip included) looks amazing! I may be adding that to my bucket list also. I would LOVE to do that with my family (with introvert breaks scheduled in, of course).
Thank you for sharing your life with us! You’re the best!
Thank you, Anna! So funny that you mention Prenda. I had never heard of it until this comment thread and then a couple of my old roommates that live in AZ were talking about it on marco polo. They love it! And I love the projects you have lined up (that cooking project sound so, so fun!). You’re amazing. I am impressed how you are embracing this phase and going with it!
Thanks for sharing these posts!
My kids will be doing online schooling at the beginning and I am just dreading it. My youngest is starting kindergarten and I had been SO EXCITED to finally have all my kids in school and now this… {Sigh.} But we’ll get by somehow…
I have to sort of brag about this– my sister worked as a server at the retirement home where Joe (from The Boys in the Boat) and his wife lived! He would carry his Olympic gold medal around in his pocket and she said he was the nicest guy and he and his wife were very sweet. How cool is that???
What? That IS super, super cool. That makes me even more excited to read the book. Thanks for sharing that! (And good luck with online schooling…)
The bear and the nightingale trilogy was hands down one of my favorites. So glad you enjoyed it!
I had no idea it was a trilogy!
My husband thinks going on an RV trip like that would be amazing. We have eight kids, though, and I’m not so sure being in such close quarters for an extended period of time would be incredibly enjoyable . I’m interested to know how you’re handling food on a trip like that: those small fridges don’t hold a lot of food for a big family!
COVID 19 took out our business in one fell swoop, so we have been extra busy and extra glued to our computers as we (my husband and I) have been starting a new business. It’s STRESSFUL to say the least. Good meals have been sparse around here lately. The good news is that I love our new venture as it has the potential to help a lot of women in a way that I am passionate about (it’s an online course that teaches women how to give birth with practically no pain).
Oh wow, I can’t even imagine that kind of stress, Rachel. I hope you are able to build up your new business and recover. It sounds fascinating – good luck!
I so enjoyed reading your update Mel. Reading about real life from others helps me deal with my real life!! And the anxiety is real for sure! I am typing this on our way to take our only child to college (freshman year) 10 hours away from home!! As hard as I tried to plan and be organized in the weeks ahead of this trip so I wouldn’t be stressed the night before, when I got in bed last night my heart was beating fast and loud, I had indigestion, and my mind would not shut off. I finally fell asleep only to wake up an hour later and the process started all over again! I even had two of my sweet cats sleeping next to me and even their gentle purrs could not settle me. And certainly the Covid fears have escalated all normal anxiety. Thankfully now that we’re on the road I have settled in for the adventure.
Our son is super excited to be going to college and so I’m focusing on all the great things he will get to do and learn and trusting God to take care of what we can’t control.
Thanks for the audiobook suggestions. I’ll look into those for the drive back home.
I may not know exactly what this next stage of life will be like for me but I do know I will still be looking forward to your blog posts and trying your amazing recipes!!
Thank you so much, Kristine! That tugged at my mom heart strings to hear of you taking your child to college. A bittersweet transition for sure. I hope all went well! Hugs to you for being a good momma – take some time for yourself and don’t feel guilty about it.
Getting ready for some major dental work….sigh…. Cute cute sun hat! Where did you get it? Love this update so much! Thanks for the RV share info. I see a possible adventure in our future. No kids at home so no back to school plans here. But we have an upcoming destination wedding in October.
Sorry for the delay – the hat is from here https://www.coolibar.com/women-s-tempe-sun-hat-upf-50.html
“ I am mentally rejuvenated when I have a degree of quiet alone time. ”
This statement is TRUTH for me! Summers are usually harder for me, for that reason. But yes, having the whole gang home since March has been an adjustment, and I miss having time to mentally breathe. I’m proud of myself for weathering it and getting better with charging ahead with no breaks, but I’m also fist pumping a bit that school is starting soon, and even if they can only go for two weeks in-person, I will CHERISH IT.
I’m proud of you, too, Susan! Cherish EVERY MINUTE!
Thanks for sharing what you’ve been up to. We are starting “school” in September. It will all be online for the first month and then they will re-evaluate. I was really hoping my kids would go back, they learn better at school. I would love the recipe for the cookies pictured in this post, they look really good!
Good luck with online schooling, Juliana…no matter how long it lasts. Here’s the cookie link: https://www.melskitchencafe.com/peanut-butter-sugar-cookies-with-chocolate-frosting/
First, so glad your mouth procedure is in the past. May you never have to endure something like that again.
I loved Boys in the Boat and Just Mercy. Thank you and your children for collecting books to add to your school library. Great idea and I’m going to look into doing the same. I just finished a book, Dear Church, that I purchased from a private black owned bookstore and will continue to support it and others from now on.
Looks like the RV jaunt was a hit! Thanks for sharing the great pictures.
We missed our annual camping trip to the Redwoods for the first time, since the kids can remember, this summer and I’ve been bummed about that for awhile now. But, we did make reservations to camp in December up in Big Sur. Call us crazy, but four other campsites were already booked when we made our reservations!
Family has been my go to through all this. We have four kids, 24, 21, 19, and 16, who remind me, in their own unique way, every day, how grateful we are to have each other. School starts in a couple days, remotely, including my husband who is a college English professor.
My daughter learned how to make pasta this summer. Do you have a favorite ravioli recipe to share? BTW, pretty much every recipe I use of yours gets a “Yummy” written at the top of the page. Because my three oldest children are young men, I have to double many recipes. Just wait, you will too!
I don’t think that’s crazy at all! Campsites are going so fast everywhere! The redwoods was one of our very favorite family vacations ever so I’m sad you didn’t get to go. Sounds like you’ll make up for it a little bit! I don’t have a great ravioli recipe (yet!) sorry!
One of our children and their family came for a short visit in early March and they are still here due to Covid. Last week, for the very first time since they arrived, I was home alone (for 1/2 an hour). I literally cried because it felt so good. I love them to pieces, but holy moly, I desperately miss my alone time. I just ache for some privacy and quiet in my own home. I know it’s hard for them, too, though we get along great and have a ton of fun. These are really hard and unsettled times and you are not alone!
I totally know what you mean – especially when such a huge change (having a short trip turn into a months long stay) was totally unexpected.
Thank you for writing about feeling anxious. I think it’s important to acknowledge that these aren’t normal times and that many aspects of life are difficult and the state of our country is very worrying. You’re definitely not alone. I feel anxious every morning, waking up waaay too early.
There is a certain amount of peace knowing none of us are alone in this!
Okay first…where did you get that cute sun hat?! Love it! Second, I totally am there with you on the introvert mom struggling with everyone in the house ALL THE TIME. I actually sat on the porch and cried when we got the news that we are doing online school again starting Sept. My coping spot has been in the car in the garage where I have hidden dark chocolate and gummies in the console lol. Deep breaths…we can do this!
Sorry for the delay – it’s from here! https://www.coolibar.com/women-s-tempe-sun-hat-upf-50.html
I have a couple coping spots, too. Hang in there momma. We CAN do this!
Mel…I have debated many times about commenting on your blog. I have followed your blog and made A LOT of your recipes…especially in the last few months. This time I couldn’t resist…I am married to Decker Woody (he told me to say that and he assured me you and Brian would know who he is). You need to look on a map and find Cocolalla, ID. We are currently there right now (only 30 minutes from CDA). Decker has talked a lot about contacting you guys for months now…besides just our Christmas card. Anyway, we love ID and if you are still around here, or are here another trip, we would LOVE to see you! In fact, we just traveled through Montana…Decker tells me that’s your old stomping grounds. Gorgeous. Lori
I’m so glad you commented, Lori! I just emailed you!
I’ve recently read…
The Vanishing Half by Brit Bennet
The Body, An Owners Guide by Bill Brysen
In Five Years by Rebecca Serle
I tend to read fiction and listen to nonfiction, I’m just shallow like that. My attention span can’t handle reading nonfiction and don’t get me started on self-help books…I just can’t do those. I’m a Dental Hygienist in Indiana, COVID has been really rough on the dental industry around here. We were shut down without pay for almost 2 months and unemployment wasn’t happening (it eventually went through the day I went back to work). I don’t consider myself to have anxiety but as this year has progressed I’m pretty sure I’m somewhere on that spectrum. During the 6 week lockdown we experienced I could barely read which is crazy for me. I could not handle anything suspenseful. I found myself reading slightly trashing, formulary romance novels, all from the same author because I knew exactly what would happen every step in each story. Absolutely no surprises. These stories were 100% predictable and it was really all I could handle. My husband is a high school administrator who has had to completely reorganize his school. We have 4 kids, my oldest is leaving to attend college in Idaho (hopefully she’ll get to stay) and the rest just want to play soccer again. All these unknowns have kind of untethered me. Reading and excercising are my coping skills. I’m probably in the best shape of my life right now!
Emily – I kind of want to cry for you. So many changes and difficult hurdles. So sorry about your job as a dental hygienist. It has been such a crazy time. And I don’t know how your husband is handling all the decisions and criticism and changes. Gah! I found for a while I could only read “cotton candy” literature too because my brain and heart couldn’t handle anything more.
I just love your blog. I agree and have taken a break from Instagram and it’s been helpful. I love your book idea. I follow Here we read, and she has something similar going on and has a great list of diversity books as well. https://www.instagram.com/hereweeread/?hl=en
Yes! I’ve gotten so many great resources from that account!
Hang in there. This will get better eventually. My husband just finished a five month dental odyssey, and it’s much better now.
I can’t wait to hear about the pants, shoes, and cookbook. You have made me a much better cook. Take all the time you need and know that we’ll be waiting for you when you’re ready.
Oh I want to cry for your husband.
I was DELIGHTED to see The Bear and the Nightingale on this post. The Winternight trilogy is one of the most fantastic, well ending trilogies I have ever read in my life. YOU WILL LOVE ALL THREE BOOKS!!!
I had no idea it was a trilogy! I’m excited now!
I have noticed you have been a little MIA. Love your recipes and I have always admired you for all you get done “for us” and take care of your family. These are trying times. Not only Covid but life in America looks like it may never be a God loving, fearing nation again. My comfort comes from my Heavenly Father. Knowing Him and what my future will be after my days on earth are over gives me great comfort. I have the advantage of being older. (Never thought being older was good until now.) I am so thankful for that blessing. Quiet time with God and my family gives me the most comfort. Have a plan for when anxiety sets in. Get your team on board. Let them know what you need. You provide for them. They will love providing for you. I will pray for you.
I love this perspective – thank you so much!
I can’t believe you didn’t tell us about that cookie?!?
I have been busy dealing with awful pain from pregnancy with baby #5 (only 17 weeks, my discomfort starts at week 4.5…)and keeping up with the garden and canning. Iowa just had a derecho storm, winds like a hurricane with NO warning, and we didn’t have power for almost 5 days. Thankfully we were able to take our freezer food to family members with power, and we had minimal damage on our property. I think I heard 10 million acres of crops lost. It was huge.
p.s. I have never tried a huckleberry!
I saw the devastation in Iowa on the news. I’m so sorry. Bless you for using your prepped food to bless others (but my goodness, all while in pain during pregnancy – HANG IN THERE!)
Thanks for all the insights! I am finally a grandmother and am enjoying this cute little guy, but know why it is when you are young that you have children! It has been a quiet, sad and reflective summer. Not just the incredible noise out there from protests, looters, politicians and the like, but we rescued an adorable dog (Chow Chow), 2 1/2 years ago. She was at least 10 – 11 years old at the time, which is the end of a chow chow’s life cycle pretty much. I was thinking about this angel of a dog we took in. She was depressed having lost her original family to death and disease and was not eating or sleeping well. WE had had a chow chow dog for 12+ years 6 years earlier so we knew their special personalities, etc. She was completely different and somewhat the same. LOL She absolutely adored walks, as do I. So we would go on two big walks everyday. She was extremely picky about food and in the end it was only american cheese and dog biscuits and treats that she existed on. The last 5 months of her life (hence my sadness) an angel appeared in the form of a homeless orange cat. Chow Chows do not, I repeat to not like cats, but these two bonded. They slept next to each other during the day and shared each others food a couple times a week. In May, our girl got sick and we spent a whole lot of money and visits to the hospitals before coming to the conclusion that she needed to go home to dog heaven. WE facilitated this on July 3rd. I am lost without this sweet soul! I have talked to God so much about how special the place needs to be for her and all of these special loves in our lives. We never had to discipline her, she never had an accident and never begged for anything but a walk! My daily walks are definitely not as sweet! I am so grateful for taking a chance on her and giving her the best life possible, which she so richly deserved. It has brought me closer to heaven and joy and tears. A friend asked me once on our walk,, “why would I go thru this again after the loss of our first dog?” I told her that it was all so worth it! No matter what we are going thru in the world right now and for the past 6 months, it will be soooooo worth it! We will be stronger, recognize goodness, mercy and joy again.
Michelle, what a sweet, heartfelt comment! I am so terribly sorry about your loss of your sweet chow chow dog. What an amazing companion for you! But clearly that amazing dog was a blessing for you (and vice versa!). I hope you find some peace and solace – looks like you will because you have so much perspective and faith!
Thank for your post, Mel. One thing I miss very much is regular contact (in person) with friends to help ground my thoughts. When all you read/hear is noise online from people you don’t know well if at all it makes me feel alone and unsure where I fit. Connecting with people helps but also have alone time with my own thoughts. Thanks for the reminder that it’s ok to not feel totally ok. This is such a crazy time so I guess that means it’s normal to feel a little crazy:)
I think it IS normal to feel a little bit crazy – but I also hope you find a way to connect with other to process through things!
You are a gifted writer! Reading your blog post during a few minutes of my own quiet time has rejuvenated me. The past 6 months have been challenging for probably all of us. I personally have missed my own space for rejuvenation (temples and church buildings), but it’s also been awesome to have so much family time together. Having a high risk kiddo we err on the conservative side and saying I’m a bit tired of going nowhere other than curbside grocery pick up is a gross understatement. I miss seeing and interacting with people (not in my immediate family) in a non-virtual way. Sometimes every day feels the same and I just don’t feel super excited about the day. Having said all of that I think I’m having way more good days than not good ones. I think I’m handling my children’s emotions and my own the best that I can. I think I’ve recognized that I need healthy food, exercise, enough sleep, and I need to serve to feel good. All of this staying at home time is pretty insightful as to areas where I can improve as a mom and a wife. And guess what? I’m actually making some improvement and I’m proud of myself. I think this has been a learning and growing year. In spite of all of the challenges I can see God’s hand in it all in how I’m being helped to grow and change a bit.
Thanks again for your words. So much of what you wrote resonated with me. It actually did feel a bit like a group friend therapy session. 🙂 And that felt so so good to know that I’m not alone in my thoughts and feelings. Hugs!
Trish, your comment was insightful because ultimately I think all this quarantine and craziness really can teach us about what priorities we want to come out of all this with. And how we can improve. I loved that so much. Thanks for sharing.
So my husband was medically separated from the military and we had a month of being convinced he would be unemployed in a pandemic with 5 kids at home… and then he got a great job that required us to move a couple states to somewhere we had never been. And I am now panicking about sending 2 kids to college (please don’t die in the Covid soup that is a college campus), and trying to take care of the 3 kids at home – I really need school to meet in person, even for just a couple of months, so my teen can make some friends. But also for no one to die. Worried for friends who are unemployed and facing hard choices. And I am surrounded by moving boxes and can’t find my drill. How am I supposed to do anything without my drill???? We are all sick of takeout. But also SO grateful for employment and a house and sunshine. It is an intense mix of feelings all over the place, man!
Oh man, Lynn – good luck with all that stress you’re carrying on behalf of your family! I hope your kiddos stay safe and healthy (and you, too).
I love that you are gathering books for school libraries! What a great idea and meaningful project for your kids! I also appreciated the book list. We have enjoyed several of those listed and will check out some of the others. I’m just starting to realize how blind I have been to the racial inequality in our country. Thanks for helping me in my journey to become more cognizant of the problems that face minorities.
Thank YOU, Stacy!
I love that you are gathering books for school libraries! What a great idea and meaningful project for your kids! I also appreciated the book list. We have enjoyed several of those listed and will check out some of the others. I’m just starting to realize how blind I have been to the racial inequality in our country. Thanks for helping me in my journey to become more cognizant of the problems that face minorities.
10 hour drive to huckleberries for us, but we make a trip out of it and freeze the huckleberries for transport on the way home. By the way, I NEED your huckleberry milkshake recipe.
We RV a lot and LOVE being off the grid. We have recently outgrown our little camper and are making do with a travel trailer + tent. We’ve road tripped to Alaska, cruised around Colorado, sweltered in Zion’s, biked the Oregon coast with it, and gaped at the Grand Canyon. I didn’t camp much growing up and the hubs said he wanted to make camping a good experience for me so I’d do it again. I’d say he knew what he was talking about =) Camping on a bed (we call it glamping) is amazing, even if he prefers to do dry camping. That being said, every time we get back from a trip, I feel like my house is MASSIVELY HUGE… especially my shower. =)
But seriously. I do need your huckleberry milkshake recipe. And if you have a huckleberry ice cream recipe, I’ll take that too. We picked 8 cups yesterday and are going out for more today =) I use about 4 cups in a pie (someone told me once that the secret to a good huckleberry pie was to grate in 1 granny smith apple and it was delish). It was so good, my kids said, “Mom, this was the best blueberry pie you’ve ever made.” Umm….
My friend also drives 9-10 hours for huckleberries but they pick GALLONS so it’s totally worth it. I love how much traveling and road tripping you have done. Amazing! My huckleberry milkshake recipe is easy: 1 quart vanilla ice cream, 1 can evaporated milk, 2-3 cups huckleberries. I’m excited about that huckleberry pie tip! Hilarious comment from your kid. I laughed out loud.
We may or may not have picked gallons this year too (there’s 8 of us total so we can pick a lot, but we go through them super fast!). =) thanks for the shake recipe – the kids will love it, I’m sure!!
You are amazing. I so related to everything you are going through and loved your insight.
Thank you, Deann!
I’m glad your wonderful family got to get away for a while. We checked the pigs and the donkey’s once and they were missing you! Loved the beautiful RV. I remember the years we went camping with our camper on the back of our pickup. So much fun with so many of us in there. Much easier to have the little ones up out of the dirt. I especially loved hearing the soft rain pelting the metal roof in the comfort of a warm bed. If you’re not scared, sleeping in the mountains makes for such a peaceful night’s rest.
Thanks for your ‘Friday Thoughts’, I enjoy reading them and as you undoubtly know, we love any of your recipes.
Thanks for being a great neighbor, Carol!
I have been waiting for years for a Mel cookbook! Thanks for the update. I’ve missed your posts, even though I am a bit sick of cooking and baking. Can’t wait to check out the book recommendations. I just finished Olive Kitteridge and need something new to listen to while I clean out drawers and cabinets (or more likely sit and relax). The pigs are adorable. We have chickens, bees, and many dogs, but a pig that doesn’t root or wallow sounds tempting! Have a nice weekend.
Thank you, Teresa. Always, always love seeing your comments.
We love to just go and get away from things too, it so nice! Our schools are open and the kids just started this week, so far they’ve loved being back and haven’t complained at all about their masks! I was one of those that very much did a lot of stress eating in the beginning of all of this craziness but I feel like we are finally starting to find our groove again and trying to get back in a good taking care of self mode and work off all the extra fluff I’ve been accumulating because of the stress/anxiety of it all! Sundays lessons with my fam have been my real saving factor, during the week I would just feel so down but then doing more in depth come follow me lessons with our family helped me to see the good that was actually coming from this experience. It drove us to really dig deeper in our at home studies instead of the short half thought about lessons we had done in the past because we felt they had already learned it at church. I really want this part of it to continue. It’s become a week saving treasure!
I love reading through others’ quarantine journey. I’m kind of sad we are back to church. Ha. I loved home church.
These Friday posts are my favorite! If things weren’t stressful enough my dad came home from the hospital this week on hospice. As the daughter that mean I get to help out a lot. Sure puts things into perspective, but I’d be lying if I wasn’t a tad overwhelmed but grateful school is starting this week, which also means we have 3 birthdays within 9 days, and my husband is u employed. But…like you when I put God and family first everything is pretty ok. Good Music, crickets singing their summer song and evening walks are keeping me going. Hang in there we need you doing just what you do.
You have so much to deal with right now, Ashli! I’m so sorry! How is your dad doing? I’m starting a gratitude journal this week to remind myself of those little things (crickets, good music!)
I’m with you, disconnecting is so freeing and grounding, yet staying plugged into my phone is such an ingrained habit I have to be extremely intentional. I love all that you’re doing for your school libraries. As a fifth grade teacher, I work really hard to have a diverse class library and to introduce students to books about people with different perspectives and circumstances, but as always I know there is room to improve. I have early bird kids and night owl kids and am definitely struggling with the lack of alone time, running has become even more crucial for my mental health. In New Mexico we started school this week in a distance model with plans to transition to hybrid as soon as mid September, we’ll see what happens . As always I love your ability to be honest, realistic and optimistic. We did the Hiawatha trail a few years ago, so incredible !
I have to be intentional about it, too! Good luck with teaching this year! So much love to the teachers out there.
Had a gum graft many years ago. Having a cup of coffee immediately after was probably not the smartest thing I’ve ever done.
Chips on sandwiches? When I was a kid, I *always* put Fritos in my tuna salad sandwiches. Haven’t done it in probably fifty years now (yeah, I’m that old) but have been tempted a few times and have no idea why I’m not just throwing caution and decorum to the wins and doing it.
Ouch to the coffee right after! That made me cringe, Jim! I’d say live life on the wildside and throw some fritos on that tuna salad sandwich!
I can’t seem to get rid of the anxiety but otherwise we are doing well. I need to cut myself off from social media to re-stabilize. I think most of my anxiety is triggered there.
I recommend Little Fires Everywhere by Celeste Ng, and Beartown and it’s sequel by Frederik Backman. Also, The Hate You Give and On the Come Up by Angie Thomas. All great audiobooks.
We just rented a house with a pool on the sunnier side of our state and it was glorious. 4 days of pool time. My only responsibilities were cooking, cleaning, and keeping one eye on the kids in the pool while reading a book. We played fun games and ate well. I didn’t bring home a lot of laundry because we loved in our swim suits. It was great.
Thank you for the book recommendations! Your house rental sounds so dreamy!
So good to hear from you! As an introvert the last few months have been hard as well. I also love my children, all 5 of them. But never having a moment of quiet is very taxing. I’m sending my kids back to school. Our start day got pushed back a week and we’re beginning online. Once numbers are better they’ll transition to a hybrid plan. Not ideal, but I’ll take it. I’m not ready to actually homeschool my kids. You’re RV trip sounds amazing! Maybe sometime I’ll convince my husband to do something like that. Good luck with your future dental work. 🙂
Our start date has been pushed back, too. I’m anxious to just have a plan. Good luck with whatever form schooling takes this fall! You’ve got this.
Thank you, thank you for your efforts to teach and model racial equality, inclusion, justice, and diversity! The past and present do not have to be the future for our children, we can create a better society for and with them! I really appreciate and respect you for opening up and publicly writing about these issues, as well as your anxiety. Fellow planner here! Best Friday Thoughts ever from my favorite blogger. Thank you.
Thank you so much! Your comment actually really bolstered me because of the back lash I’ve received for doing this book project. It’s nice to read that there is support for this kind of thing. Thank you. XOXO
Thanks for your fun post! I’ve unexpectedly added another “C” besides COVID to 2020: breast cancer. Since June, I’ve had the whirlwind experience of biopsy, being diagnosed, having port-placement surgery, and having chemo. It has taught me that though I thought I was pretty much in control of things, I am not and God totally is! It has also taught me what a wonderful support system I have in my husband, adult kids, and so many friends who are serving me by doing everything from mowing my lawn, cooking meals, making me blankets, and delivering Starbucks out of the blue! I am definitely learning to how trust, rest, and serve!
Oh Shelly, I’m so, so sorry to hear of your cancer diagnosis. Your perspective is inspiring. I’m so glad you are letting others serve you. I will be praying for you!
Audio book recommendation: ” The God Who Weeps: How Mormonism Makes Sense of Life” by Fiona Givens and Terryl Givens.
Thank you!
Lovely update! Thank you for your openness and honesty. Love reading about your plans for buying books – great project! (And your farm Instagram is one of my faves!)
Thanks, Jesse!
Currently: same boat as you, Mel. On so many things! Speaking of boats, The Boys in the Boat. Best book! In fact, I went so far as to start using the rowing machine at the little gym I go to. Another “good” book: DARE by Barry McDonagh. Sub titled The New Way to End Anxiety and Stop Panic Attacks. This book was recommended to me by a therapist to read as a way to help one of my kids. It’s written for adults but it has been the most valuable book for helping my child and for myself as well! Highly recommend. Lastly: returned home from camping and used hairspray for the first time in a week. I can never decide which is better: being away, relaxing, unplugging and resetting, or coming back to civilization and showering afterwards. It’s a toss up.
Two more notes: good luck with the school year and I’m sincerely glad you’re recovered from mouth surgery!!
Thank you for the book recommendation, Ellen! I actually think the way you describe it that it could be very helpful for one of my kids, too. Thank you!
Love the book project, and that you are doing it with the kids. In our seventies, we are moving to low carb eating. That means I am using fewer of your recipes, but still enjoy the occasional post. Hang in there. We are creeping up on a remodel project. Scary, stressful. Looking forward to making an inviting attic for future guests. Otherwise staying in a lot, catching up on years of British TV. Doing a lot of cooking for two, working down the freezer and pantry. Going forward on faith.
Good luck with your remodel! Stressful for you (as someone who just went through a remodel) but the idea of it sounds amazing!
I have had anxiety as well. I also find peace and serenity when I take more time to unplug. I think it’s great that you know when it’s time to take a break. It’s easy to feel pressure to keep filling out schedules when sometimes what we need is to step back and regroup.
My kids are starting school next week. I have mixed feelings about it, but I think it’s something they need. I have talked to them about how there might be a lot of change and going back and forth. It’s a great practice in being flexible!
I started a gratitude journal this summer that is specifically to write down things I’m grateful for each day. It has really helped to keep me from only focusing on the negative things that often get front and center coverage.
Thanks for sharing the project you are working on with your kids! It gives me ideas of ways I can actively work on bringing our society one step closer to understanding each other and making sure that everyone has equal opportunities.
I firmly believe that as we come together and support each other we will make it through all the difficulties and challenges that come our way. Thanks for creating a space where we can do that so easily!
The gratitude journal! A couple key people in my life have mentioned it lately. I’ve always resisted, it seems hokey to me (I don’t know why) but I have felt prompted to start. And so I am. Thanks for your additional reminder.
I love following your piggies! I spend a lot of time petting my dogs.
It is a challenge to have everyone home all the time. I sometimes retreat to my room and take a nap or read.
The college kids are back at school or going soon. I will miss them.
6th grader is at a private school and is slated to go in person with lots of PPE and safety measures. I told him to think flexibility for this year.
Hang in there. I can’t wait to make a cookie s’more. I like using a caramel square!
Oooh, a caramel square on a s’more – YUM!
You’re the best, Mel!!! Uplifting always, even for 72 year old me!!! Love your recipes! Love hearing about your beautiful family!! Love you sharing your thoughts! Life as we know it has changed, but our attitude and prayers will get us through!!! Big hugs!!
Thank you! XOXO
Hey, hey! Thanks so much for sharing with the masses your experiences in humaning. Your eclectic-meets-structured lifestyle during the pandemic seems very sensible, and I appreciate your honesty, and your willingness to share the behind the scenes viewpoints.
We traveled in a Thor across your same terrain a few years back with our kids, and also adored the Hiawatha Trail. A hidden gem!! If you get a hankering to go further east, another lesser known favorite was The Enchanted Highway in North Dakota, and the Medora Musical (not to be missed is the pre-show dinner where they fondue steaks on pitch forks into giant vats of hot oil ❤️).
Thank you for that recommendation! We lived near the ND border when we were in Minnesota, but we never experienced the Enchanted Highway. I love the sound of it!
I am so happy that I stumbled upon your blog while searching for a recipe. Although my children are grown ad gone, I teach first grade. I can’t remember a fall when I have had so much concern about going back to school. There are always those fears about being “enough” for my students: kind, supportive, inspiring, and motivating are just a few of the “enoughs” that I want to have for them. This year, however, there are so many more: can I keep them safe and fearless in a world that is so rapidly changing? Can I take brand new first graders and teach them enough technology in the first few days so that, if we do have to teach virtually again, that they can feel confident in their abilities? Can I encourage each to accept the differences in others in the safe space of my classroom that may not be as safe anymore? Anyway, cooking has always been a stress reliever for me so your recipes have been a godsend. Thank you
Oh Lynn, good luck teaching. You sound like such an intentional teacher with heartfelt concerns. And you’re right, there are SO many more concerns this year. I hope all goes well for you and those sweet 1st graders!
Thanks for an update Mel! I was just thinking the other day that I hadn’t received anything new from you for a few weeks. Glad to hear you’ve taken time off to travel with your family. I love the idea of renting an RV and bookmarked the site for future reference.
Our kids started back to school, in person everyday for elementary kiddo and 50% in person for our sixth grader. We’re in Indiana and our numbers are increasing some. My kids are mentally so much better now that they are back in person. A case has been reported in each of their schools, but the schools have great procedures in place. Hoping they work and they can stay in school for a while yet!
My stress level has increased with worry about it all. Hence the “need” to bake cookies despite a busy Friday yesterday. I too am an introvert and daily walks with our dog and working in my garden help me a lot.
Hope you continue to find some daily alone time and looking forward to new recipes. Take care!
I think my kids will also have a boost in their mental aptitude and health if/when they can go back to school, even if it is a hybrid system. I hope you take care as well – thanks so much, Vickie!