Monday Thoughts: Will You Help Me?
UPDATE: I wanted to let those of you know who check back here for an update, that our sweet Holli ended her earthly battle with painful terminal cancer on April 2, 2021. I don’t know anyone who lived life as full of faith and testimony and love for God as Holli, so it was bittersweet and beautiful that she passed away on Good Friday, just days before Easter. Words are inadequate to describe the heartbreak of the last few days as her husband and six kids have faced this new reality, but her family has been comforted and buoyed up by the knowledge that Holli is finally free of pain and suffering, and they are clinging to the knowledge that they are not alone, that God is aware of them, that He will help them, and that they will see Holli again.
Thank you for your overwhelming support on this post and through other means for Holli and her family. Her sister and I read her your comments as they came in – she was brought to tears every time as so many of you shared your own personal challenges. She couldn’t believe over 1,000 of you chose to do something hard for her. It touched her in ways impossible to describe and gave her peace that carried her through her final days as she contemplated that her life and example might have possibly inspired others and maybe even helped change lives in some way.
We love you, Holli! Life will truly never be the same without you.
——–
I’m taking a little departure from my usual recipes today. We’re going straight into Monday Thoughts (never been done before). Just go with it.
I have some things weighing on my heart and mind that I want to share with you.
But first, I want to tell you about someone.
Her name is Holli. She’s an incredibly dear friend of mine (think: soul sister type of friend).
In all my years of blogging, I’ve never dedicated a whole post to a real, live human. Chocolate chip cookies? Yes. Random Friday thoughts? Yes. Special human beings? Not so much.
But today, I need your help. Holli needs your help.
It might not be the “help” you are thinking of, but if you have a minute, stick with me for a story and then a request (spoiler alert: it has nothing to do with money).
The back story: I’ve known Holli for six years – ever since we moved from Minnesota to Idaho. She’s spunky. She’s hilarious.
She’s a truth seeker and a fighter for justice. She’s an amazing mom to six wildly wonderful kids. She constantly serves everyone around her. To know Holli is to love her.
Amid all of Holli’s greatness, she’s had an incredibly challenging life. Not all of the details are mine to share, but suffice it to say, her life has not been easy. Intense infertility, adoption, countless (and I mean countless) surgeries for health issues related to colitis, job stresses, and the list goes on.
Most people don’t know many of these things about Holli because she is in that rare camp of: Fiercely Independent Non-Complainer.
Seriously, if I didn’t love her so much, it would be almost annoying, because she just.never.complains. That girl can fight through pain and struggle like no one else. (And yet, she still listens when I complain about my pigs escaping or my cookies burning.) #goodfriend
About a year and a half ago on top of all the other challenges Holli has faced in her life, after finding a seemingly innocent lump, she was unexpectedly and devastatingly diagnosed with stage 4 internal metastatic mucosal melanoma. This diagnosis came out of nowhere, and needless to say it has rocked their family’s world.
The last 15 months have been filled with immunotherapy, radiation, flights to Mayo clinic for consultation, more treatments, pain, and indescribable stress and worry.
(Not to mention six kids and all of their daily, busy, and often difficult emotional needs.)
Through it all, Holli has remained one of the strongest warriors I’ve ever seen. She has powered through horrific treatment side effects that would easily fell the rest of us, and has quite literally taken on the full-time job of fighting cancer.
She has not once given up hope. She has retained a strong and abiding faith in a loving God who knows her and has a plan for her.
Miraculously, 2020 gifted Holli more than six months of respite, thanks to a combination of immunotherapy, holistic treatments (gosh, I could tell some stories involving slippery elm gruel and tinctures here but I won’t), and a complete shift to a sugar-free and vegan diet.
Last month, things started to fall apart for Holli again. Sudden seizures, many ER trips, and lots of pain revealed the cancer had ferociously spread throughout Holli’s body and into her brain.
She no longer has the full function of the left side of her body and she is in excruciating pain nearly constantly.
And still. She continues to show more strength in her pinky finger than I have in my entire body and soul.
Today, I wanted to give back to Holli in some way. Sure, that can easily be done through their GoFundMe page.
But I wanted to also do something else.
Holli has spent her entire lifetime being strong for other people and using her inner and God-given strength to conquer her greatest challenges, but her body is failing her right now, and she is no longer able to do some of the things that you and I probably take for granted.
Fold laundry.
Braid her daughter’s hair.
Take a walk around the block.
Load the dishwasher.
Send a text message.
I don’t believe it’s healthy or constructive to compare challenges. Hardship and stress and grief is individual. It’s sacred. Hard is hard no matter what you are going through or dealing with.
But if I’ve learned anything from Holli’s situation, it is to look for the good (even on very bad days), appreciate the mundane, and be grateful for each and every day.
And this is where I need your help.
Will you do something for me? For Holli? For you?
Will you do something hard today? Or this week? Something that perhaps you’ve been procrastinating?
It may not be something that would be hard to anyone else, but remember: that doesn’t matter. Your life is your own.
- Maybe it’s getting off the couch and finally running that pesky mile even if you haven’t run in years.
- Or picking up the phone to call a family member who you haven’t talked to in a while.
- Maybe it’s just being grateful that you have the ability and motor skills to fold laundry today.
- Or giving your spouse or child a hug even if you (or they) feel prickly and unloveable.
- Maybe it’s finally ditching the three-sizes-too-small jeans hiding in your closet and buying a pair of jeans that fit your amazing and able body.
- Or saying a prayer for the first time in a long time (or ever).
If you feel so inclined to share, will you leave a comment on this post? Even if you aren’t sure you can do it yet, write your plan in the comments and we’ll be strong together.
I am going to plop myself on Holli’s bed and read all of your comments out loud to her. And let her know that there are people across the world inspired by her story and strength.
Holli does not like attention or being a burden or inconvenience to anyone (if you know her in real life, you know how true that is!), but she does feel as though her life has purpose insomuch as it has inspired others that they, too, can do hard things and be stronger for it.
My BeStrongForHolli goal: finally get through a 30-minute virtual cycling class without falling off and quitting and acknowledge that my body is strong and able (and also give each of my kids at least three 8-second hugs today – our home has been filled with contention lately and I need to be the impetus to changing that). Love you, Holli.
Thank you for letting me take a departure from food today.
I’ll leave you with the words of one of Holli’s favorite songs:
And I, I don’t want to leave a legacy
I don’t care if they remember me
Only Jesus
And I, I’ve only got one life to live
I’ll let every second point to Him
Only Jesus
I have the best readers in the world. Thank you for being here and for all you do to make this world a better place.
Be strong for Holli goal: be present with my children and truly listen to the wants and needs with not distractions. I want to be more consistent with my exercise and appreciate my muscles working to keep me strong and capable to live my best live with my husband and children! Thanks Holli, you and your family are in my prayers ♥️
My goodness. I love you Mel. And it sounds like I would love Holli too. Today I went and visited one of my ministering sisters. I didn’t want to go, but my companion was insistent, so I made it happen. It was wonderful. I just finished an amazing book called “all things new” by terryl and fiona givens. It was beautiful. Talks about how our goal in life should be to be healers, like the Christ. I am in my own suffering having just lost my dad. Visiting today was a sweet offering, and made me realize even more that we need each other. I also need to look outward in my grief. Holli, you are a beautiful soul. I can tell just by looking at the pictures. I am so very sorry for your pain. So very sorry. You will be in my thoughts, and I will be intentional with choosing to do hard things this week. I love the 8 second hug idea. I’ll go with that tomorrow. Holding space for the both of you here in my corner in utah. Much love, bri.
I. Love. This. Thanks for the invitation to be better today, Mel and Holli! My hard things are ridiculous but I for sure would not have done them without this encouragement. I registered and paid for tests to get my TX teaching license, changed my address on 4 websites and signed up to feed the missionaries. I have been putting it off for a solid month. Love and hugs to you both.
Oh dear Holli my sister in Christ may Jesus be with you may you have an overwhelming sense of His Presence and His deep deep Love for you we ask why Lord why this and we may not ever know that answer in this lifetime but one day He will show us and one day all this pain His children have experienced on this earth will be a thing of the past never to be remembered when we are in the Presence of the One that gave His Life for us so that we can be with Him and our loved ones forever no more sickness or crying or pain Holli I will be praying for you and with God All Things Are Possible so I am praying for healing and miracles for you and that all your needs be met
I will prioritize FUN. My to do list is going to take a back seat.
Thank you for making me think and feel.
Currently bawling over this post Mel…I’ve adored you for years …my mother in law died today and it’s sooo complicated … but I’m awake too late tonight and read this message…tomorrow morning I will get up to help your friend who totally deserves it ❤️♥️
Thank you…for showing up for us. You are a bright spot in my day as you share not only your wonderful recipes but your fun family life as well. Holli is blessed to have you in her corner at a time when she needs all the encouragement she can get! Blessings to Holli and her family as they face each day with love and courage.
Wow! What an incredible story. Thank you for sharing Mel. Holli, you are an inspiration and it gives me way more courage to do those things I think are hard which when placed in perspective aren’t so bad. I’m raising teenagers, enough said. I have one in particular that causes me sleepless nights. I take on a lot of guilt and worry myself over what I could do or should do past, present and future. I’m going to do something hard and try to give myself some grace. Try not to shoulder all the weight of his choices. I think I’ll follow your lead Holli and forget myself and go to to work. Serve more, love more. Thank you for inspiring me!
Ps great name!
Holli,
You’re incredible!! Thank you for your example of strength, love and positivity. Especially in the world today. Wow!! You’re a rockstar!! I’ve been in a funk through covid but am committing right now to change those habits tomorrow! Thank you to your friend Mel here and you for setting the example to be better, be kinder, and show more love. God bless you! You and your family will be in my prayers ❤❤❤
Dear Holli, tomorrow I will reach out to that person I’ve been putting off contacting because every convo is a forty five minute emotional roller coaster. I’ll make the time for her because your example of strength during trial has inspired me. Sending you love and prayers for brighter days ahead. Xoxox Jenny
It is hard to be the one suffering and to be the one watching others suffer. Thank you for being vulnerable and sharing this story. My BeStrongforHolli goal is to get up earlier than my children and before work to exercise or read scriptures…even when I am tired. Also, I want to do better at being grateful for my strengths/weaknesses and all of the things that make me, me in order to spend less time in the world of comparison. I don’t know either of you, but thank you for inspiring me to be better. Prayers for you and your family, Holli!!
Dear Holli,
I read your story on a morning when I could barely get out of bed, I was feeling so crushed by the weight of my own failings and fears. I told God I couldn’t do it today. But if you can show up for your life, then so can I.
We lost my sister-in-law Alisa to melanoma almost six years ago, at 36. I believe in miracles and that God can will you to live. But if He chooses to bring you home, know that I can promise you Alisa has been involved in her husband’s and her children’s lives and they have known it. She is an active angel in this family and her work as a mother, wife, sister, aunt and friend continues. God bless, sweet Holli. I will be praying for you by name.
Praying for Holli!!
OMG! Mel! What an amazing email! Holli came to life to me through your words. I feel like I know this wonderful woman, this sister in Christ, this dear friend of yours! She’s an amazing Mom, wife and friend. She’s stronger than I could ever dream to be, smarter and more devoted to being the best that she can be! Wow, God has to smile many times daily watching her with pride! I thought you wrote great recipes- geez, you need to write a book! Holli has inspired me to get my lazy 66 year old butt off this couch more often than doing laundry, dishes, paying bills, cleaning, cooking, personal stuff and I’m going to walk every single day! I haven’t done it since Covid started and I’m in Florida! I live in a gorgeous mobile home park that is safe and has great streets that aren’t heavy trafficked and allow me to just walk, enjoy the fresh air and exercise and I’m going to devote that time to praying! I used to do it and had that peace that Christ promised would surpass all understanding! I’m going to get it again! I’m also going to pray for Holli, her husband, her kids, her friend Mel & family and even me! God’s got this Mel! Trust Him! It may not make sense but like Romans 8:28 – God works everything out for our good and His purpose! You’re wonderful and I’m also going to that Go Fund Me page! Please keep me updated and don’t ever feel like you have to apologize for writing what’s on your heart, and put there by God to share! Who knows who may turn their life to Him because of your email! God Bless You Mel!!
God Bless you Holli! We will be praying every night for peace and comfort for you, your husband and sweet family
I’ll be praying for you and your beautiful family. I will also hug my children tighter and remember to be thankful for all the wonderful gifts in our life. You are an inspiration but I will pray so that you don’t have to be. So you can be just another mom dealing with all the annoying and little problems of raising a family. That is my most heartfelt prayer and hope for you.
I am going to take charge of my life and stop purging when I get stressed out. Thank you for helping me find the strength and courage to do so.
What a beautiful post, Mel. Holly, you are an inspiration. Tomorrow I will be heading to the high school for my cross country team. We have our time trials and there will be two of us wrangling 45 high schoolers. They’ll all make the team, but they will work hard during the time trial. I am going to ensure that I look each one of them in the eye and compliment them on something specific about their effort.
You are a beautiful woman and your light and love shine through in your photos. Your family shares and bathes in your light and love. Thank you for inspiring us with your courage and strength.
Eileen
Amazing Grace….how sweet the sound of your story Holli. It takes an amazing and grace-filled person to fight the battles. And to adopt. And to be strong for those around you. You have an infectious smile…strong and beautiful. I wish every day for you to be filled with love, laughter, and even tears (because they are healing). In honor of you, your family, and your strength, I will take better care of myself both physically and mentally starting tomorrow. Thank you Mel for sharing this powerful story of your Amazing friend. God bless you both.
Wow! What an amazing woman. Thank you for sharing her story. I have been battling c diff foe the past few weeks (thought it was a nursing home disease, not that I could get it at age 35), and I have been feeling bad for myself. Time to stop! Time to be thankful for this amazing body I have. Time to put on a happy face to homeschool my wonderful children. Thank you. Prayers for Holli and her family. And you.
Wow, this past year has strung our hearts on a high wire of stress and fear. People like Holli provide the counterbalance and steadiness to remind us what balance really depends on: inner strength, hope, and faith. I’m committing to laugh and breathe deep through the challenges of homeschooling instead of getting angry and lashing out, I can certainly use Holli as a source of inspiration to do this hard thing.
I’ve had Postpartum Depression since my almost 6 year old was born. During her birth the umbilical cord Ruptured, they had 1 minute to stop her from bleeding out and 3 minutes to stop me from bleeding out. My husband said there was so much blood everywhere. I suffered with PTSD for almost 2 years as well.
Fast forward to 2019 when I woke up in excruciating pain in my neck and mainly my left shoulder and arm. Physical therapy, chiropractic treatment, and pain meds didn’t help at all. Had an MRI and they found 3 bulging discs in my neck, 2 severe enough to need surgery. We were in the middle of relocating to another state and my father dying so I did an epidural steroid injection. Which helped 100% for about 9 months when the pain came back. A visit with a neurosurgeon, x-rays, another MRI and talking about another steroid injection when I took a bad fall down icy steps that made the injection no longer an option; it was time for a double disc replacement. I had the surgery January 8th which was successful in relieving me from all the pain I had before. What I never expected was the depression to come back full force to a debilitating level. Recovery is long and painful but I “look” fine. So I feel like people look at me like I’m lazy instead of recuperating, honestly I look at myself that way too. I couldn’t leave the house for 2 weeks after the surgery I rarely left my room. I couldn’t do anything physically and my thoughts spiraled downward. Some days I got out of bed only enough to make sure the kids made morning car pool.
Today I not only got up but I got dressed, put on a tiny bit of makeup, went with a friend to a store and worked on diy crafts for valentines. ♥️
I pray the Lord will bless you and your family with peace and a knowledge that Families can be together forever. I pray that you and those around you will feel of His love and that you will be given the enduring power of the atonement in your remaining time here on earth, however long that is. ♥️
I will be praying for you, Holli.
I get severe anxiety on occasion. There was a point in my life when I obsessed and feared over dying and not being here on earth with my kids. I feared going out of my house, driving in the car, etc., because of what could happen. I turned small health issues into huge ordeals. I went to doctors for conditions that I created with this anxiety.
I overcame that in part (I still struggle all the time, but I feel more able to deal with it) by listening to some programs on the SaintChannel (it was the MormonChannel at the time) called Enduring It Well and Conversations. Listening to others’ experiences increased my faith in Jesus Christ and helped me move on from being frozen in fear (Thank you for sharing your experience, Holli. Your faith, endurance, and strength gives me hope and has increased my faith.). Lately, I have felt this anxiety creep up on me again. I have to remind myself daily of my faith, my testimony of Christ and the plan of salvation. For my hard thing- I will walk forward in faith, trusting in God’s plan for me, embracing each precious moment I have with my kids and husband and as a homemaker (even the not fun moments and the mundane mom-tasks). I won’t let this anxiety freeze me from living and using all the time I have with those I love to the fullest.
I’ll be praying for you Holli. Thank you for your example and strength. I am inspired by you. I will be running with a friend tomorrow morning. Getting my body moving and also strengthening a friendship.
We all have different battles to fight and different mountains to climb. Honestly, I hate the mountain that I have to climb right now, but I will do it tomorrow with hope. Thank you for your faith and courage!
Hi Holli,
Even though this is the first I’ve heard of you, I’m thinking we could be special friends.
I do have things in my life I can work on, but I think I will focus my prayers on you this week. Power of prayer can do amazing things. Hang in there, stay strong, and don’t forget to breathe. Life can be so chaotic—here’s to clearing your mind and leaving your worries in the hands of the Lord. God’s blessings to you!
God is surely with your friend or she would not be able to bear what she is going through and still have hope. I have seen my sister in such a circumstance from cancer and yet , her faith shone through every single moment. She was an inspiration to all around her.
God is working through Holli to show us all what kind of life we should lead.
So , it is incumbent upon the rest of us to receive that gift and try to emulate her strength and conviction. May she continue to have the grace that God has bestowed on her throughout her trials. In God’s love to Holli and all who surround her, Peace be with you.
Gaylie Blake
I am going to slow down and make a better effort to hear my kiddos and take the time to respond…also to have more fun with my spouse. 🙂 🙂 🙂 Thank you for sharing this message- Holli sounds amazing and saying prayers for her and her family.
Holly sounds amazing. My goal for this week: to spend a few minutes one-on-one with each of my kids, giving them my full attention. They love this time, but it has been so hard for me to carve out the time. Putting it on priority status.
I am praying for you, Holli, and for your whole family.
My day is over as I read this, but today, by the grace of God, I was able to treasure precious moments with my two daughters as we had a school day at home, and then played in the snow.
Every day is a gift, and I learned that in a vivid way when my 3 month old son, Josiah passed away last year.
And yet, your story, Holli, is such a needed reminder for me- to continue to praise the Lord and be strong in His strength.. to be thankful for the many gifts and blessings I have.
“Blessed be the God and Father of our Lord Jesus Christ, the Father of mercies and God of all comfort, who comforts us in all our tribulation…”
(2 Corinthians 1:3-4a)
I am praying that the peace of God which surpasses all understanding will guard your heart and mind in Christ Jesus.
I am praying for you, Holli, and for your whole family.
My day is over as I read this, but today, by the grace of God, I was able to treasure precious moments with my two daughters as we had a school day at home, and then played in the snow.
Every day is a gift, and I learned that in a vivid way when my 3 month old son, Josiah passed away last year.
And yet, your story, Holli, is such a needed reminder for me- to continue to praise the Lord and be strong in His strength.. to be thankful for the many gifts and blessings I have.
“Blessed be the God and Father of our Lord Jesus Christ, the Father of mercies and God of all comfort, who comforts us in all our tribulation…”
(2 Corinthians 1:3-4a)
I am praying that the peace of God which surpasses all understanding will guard your heart and mind in Christ Jesus.
Praying for Holli & her family. My #bestrongforholli goal this week will be to stop what I am doing and look my kids in the eyes when they talk to me.
Tomorrow I am going to be happy that I have the time and resources to be able to pick my sons up from school so one can go to the dentist. I’m going to hug that kiddo after the dentist who only loves hugs on his own terms and tell him how much I love him before I send him back for the end of the day.
Sending prayers and love and good wishes Holli’s way. ❤️
This was so timely. I have felt like I’m sinking for awhile, and with two special needs boys, whose ups and downs often take a heavier toll than I tell anyone, I have often felt like just a failure. So tonight I did something simple – I cleaned my bathroom. It was my hard, but it was overdue, and it was a reminder of simple things make the world feel better. Your friend sounds like a fighter and an inspiration. Thanks for sharing. ❤️
Oh, Holli. My heart and prayers are with you. Thank you for being an example of what is truly important. My hard thing will be to stop complaining and to be grateful for the wonderful body that I have. Sending love.
Hugs for Holli ❤️❤️
Mel thank you for posting about your friendship with Holli. I love what you’re asking of us. We can help! Holli you are loved & I don’t even know you.
I want to combat against any kind of gossip & be the one to stand up against it! Today I could’ve and should’ve done that, but I’m not going to back down any more! I will stand strong for Holli! I will speak & listen to goodness & be resilient against any negative talk! ♥️♥️♥️
I’m so sorry for Holli’s condition and so grateful for her story. Our Lord’s eyes have never left her, He is carrying her through this. Because Jesus lives, we can face tomorrow.
For Holli, I’ll start exercising daily, which is really hard for me.
May the peace that transcends all understanding guards Holli’s heart and mind through Jesus Christ. I’ll be praying for her and her family.
May God be with Holli and her family through this challenge. May she find comfort in the arms of Jesus who is walking beside her each moment of each day.
The hard thing I am going to do for Hollie, is forgive a brother in law and love him (even if he isn’t ready to be loved by me). Family is everything. Love is everything. We are prayer warriors for you and your family. ♥️
Holli you are an inspiration!
My hard thing will be done tomorrow. My first grader is a online-school terror. Our relationship has gone down the drain this year because I’m constantly yelling at him to sit down, turn on his camera and listen to his dang teacher. Tomorrow I will not yell at him even once. Sounds simple but to me it’s hard! And I’ll do it for you.
Hi Holli: I have been struggling with a lot of pain for a year and a half due to a back issue. Long story short I’m off work on lots of meds to control pain even though I’m still in pain. I have to do exercises every day that I don’t do. I’m either feeling not well or too much pain or yet another excuse after another. After reading about your story on here I am going to push through the pain and make sure I do my exercises no less then three times a week on top of my one Physio appointment no excuses! You are amazing and God is with you always!!! God bless and great big hugs!!!
I have let myself become mentally crippled with all the “great” things I want to do. I’ll come up with a great plan (like, make a couple of extra dresses to donate, while I’m making my granddaughters dresses, then my brain decides to make a hundred dresses) and just like that I’m too overwhelmed. Sometimes I’ll even execute my plan (like make a small gift for some neighbors) but decide I need a great way to package it or a cute card to go with it and the gifts just sit. I want to write the best, most amazing letters rather than send a simple note. Many times I’ve made baked goods to take to neighbors but couldn’t find the perfect plate to put them and ended up eating them before they go bad (hello calories). This week, tomorrow in fact, I’m going to start acting instead of just thinking, offering what I have instead of waiting to offer “more”, sharing the things I have been blessed with as they are because they are enough. Thank you for the opportunity to think about what I can do right here and right now.
I have just one quick additional thought I have learned in my years: God puts us where we need to be, when we need to be there.
Many prayers, MaryAnn
Oh Mel! Oh Holli!
Here is my contribution. I said affirmations to myself today. It was hard and I cried. But I need to remember that I am a daughter of God everyday.
Holli is a true inspiration and my heart aches for her, and her husband and kids. What an emotional roller coaster they seem to be stuck on. Holli has my truest and best wishes for moments of peace, laughter and wisdom through all of this. Holli, you have been an inspiration to ME today and for a long time to come. I have thought of you many times since I read your story this morning, and I’m so blessed to know your story and your character. Today, I sat on the floor and played with my little boy, who is only 3 years old and is my last baby at home. I haven’t heard him giggle so hard in weeks, and it brought tears to my eyes. It was such a simple gesture to sit on the floor and play, but it truly meant something much larger. Because of you, Holli, I will focus more on what really matters (family! health! sleep! nutrition! exercise! belly laughs!) and less on what doesn’t actually matter (dog hair! fingerprints on the windows! email! gossip!). I will make a concerted effort to treat my body better; to nourish more healthily, to move it more, and to appreciate how it moves me through this life. Thank you, Mel, for lighting up the world with Holli’s story. She is a courageous and beautiful soul and we are so lucky to hear her story and make changes in our lives because of it. What power. Thank you!
In honor of Holli’s strength and courage I am starting something new this week. I really dislike talking on the phone, especially with strangers. This week I will begin taking phone calls from 6 partners for our church’s monthly food pantry. I’ll try to be a cheery voice that takes their order, asks about joys and concerns and if there are ways we can pray for them.
I have been so blessed to have known Holli. 5 years ago I was going through a very tough time. I felt so alone, confused, angry, embarrassed and hopeless because of a new trial. One of extreme anxiety in my child that looked to the observer and sometimes myself, like I just needed to use more tough love. My first memory of Holli was a day at church when I was struggling with this child, probably both of us sweaty, angry and frustrated. Holli looked across the room and into my eyes with compassion, kindness, understanding and humor. Zero judgement. It was the first person who somehow gave to me exactly what I needed in that trial. I treasure each interaction I’ve had which was often just running into Holli in Costco or in passing at school events because she gave me gifts of spiritual strength, joy and encouragement every single time just with her spirit and strength. I love Holli and her fantastic kids and husband. My hard thing I will do in honor of Holli is walk or exercise in some way every day. I never do it and I need to desperately. Also, I will set goals to spend time with all the little people in my life who would love to have some attention- 4 daughters, 14 nieces and nephews, 7 grandchildren.
This likely falls under the category of internet TMI… oh well! Hopefully it makes Holli smile. (Or her husband.) I commit to initiate intimacy with my husband tonight. There are certainly some mental hurdles to overcome with that, but I can be strong in my hard things, too. My husband thanks you, Holli! 😉
Praying for you, Holli. You sound like a fun friend to do life with and I admire you for adopting. Love your favorite song!
Dear Holli ~ this post has touched me in so many ways and for many different reasons. I wish I could give you magic words to take your life and your world back, I would do it. I wish I could take away the pain that follows you, the things you must be thinking about every day instead of laying back and thinking about only yourself. I wish I could explain to God that this is not what anyone should have to endure, but who am I to question his plan. So, instead, I am using your story to remind me of all I have to be thankful for, because I needed this wake up call and because your sweet friend Mel asked for help on your behalf….
I promise to begin my mornings sending you love and praying for you and your family.
I promise to stop whining in my own head about what I don’t have and live in the moment with all the blessings I’ve been given.
I promise to resume walking every day in your honor, to get back to a healthier weight.
I promise to remind myself of your battle and let it energize me in whatever struggles I face.
And I promise to remember your story when my pain rises and I think I’ve been given more than I can deal with. You have reminded me I am a woman and we are strong. Strong enough to lean on, strong enough to fight like a warrior and strong enough to be there for our friends when they need us. I will never forget you or Mel for sharing her love for you and your precious friendship.
Thank you for making my life better…when I came here to enrich yours.
I am sending prayers and well wishes to Holli and her family. I applaud her strength and resilience. Bless you for telling her story! I commit to complaining less, about not being able to travel, freely dine out, seeing friends and family, due to the pandemic.
After reading about your friend Holli today, I have tried to just really be in the moments with my family today. Really stop and listen to each person and give hugs and smile and laugh together. It is easy to take for granted what a wonderful day to day life I enjoy with my family and your message today was a good reminder to treat it with the importance it deserves. My thoughts and prayers are with your friend and her family at this time and I hope that they will have peace and courage in the days ahead. Much love. ❤️