Friday Thoughts
Hey, friends!
How is the fall treating you??
It’s time for a quick Friday Thoughts check-in. We’ve got everything from memes to mental health today.
I love these posts because of everything you share in the comments. They’re my favorite. YOU are my favorite(s).
1. Two memes to sum up my existence right now.
That koala bear meme. Please tell me I’m not the only parent that can relate with that one.
And also, the reason I feel like a permanently exhausted pigeon is almost certainly because of the second item in today’s Friday Thoughts lineup.
2. Piglets, piglets, piglets.
If you follow my faux farm account on Instagram, you’ll know that our kunekune pig momma, Olivia, had a litter of piglets 2 1/2 weeks ago. And oh my gosh, they are the cutest things ever. But they are also so much work!
The original plan was to time the litter birth for when the kids were home from school in the summer, but the best laid plans didn’t account for the pigs taking forever to “get the job done” if you know what I mean.
So. I’ve been largely responsible for the piglets while the kids are at school. And to say these little zoomie rascals are more than I bargained for is an understatement.
We lost one in the first few days to a birth defect, another one has struggled to thrive so I’m constantly trying to keep her eating and growing, and they’re so adorable, that, yes, I spend a lot of time sitting out in the pig hut watching them play, because I can’t tear myself away. #pigsoverpeople
Three of the kids invested their savings in the adult kunekune pigs in the hopes of making their investment back by selling piglets. So, here we are. It’s been an adventure!
If you go to the PIGLETS highlights on Instagram, you’ll see all the antics from the last few weeks. Warning: turns out, piglet content is highly addictive.
3. My Friend Maria
I want to tell you about someone really amazing. My friend, Maria.
Earlier this year, Brian came home from work and asked if I still had the reading book I used when our kids were learning how to read. When I asked him why, he said a sweet lady he works with (Maria) had come to his office asking if he had any resources or places that could help her because she didn’t know how to read.
He explained that Maria is one of the most hard working employees at the plant, that she raised five kids as a single mom, and that she is also smart, kind, quiet, and a caretaker of others. Her life has been challenging in ways he and I will never be able to fully understand.
I pulled out my old reading lesson book for Brian to take to work…and immediately felt this strong desire to help Maria learn to read, even though she and I didn’t know each other yet.
After Brian helped arrange things at work, Maria and I started getting together every morning (4X a week) back in May to do reading lessons together. I doubted I’d be a very good teacher, but it turns out, this rather old-fashioned book is just as effective teaching adults to read as it is teaching kids to read!
Of course, the main reason for success is because of Maria’s heart. Her determination. Her unfailing willingness to keep trying. She persevered even after years of being told by many, many people that she was stupid because she couldn’t read and that she’d never be able to learn.
Over the last five months, Maria and I started out each lesson together talking about life and family and stresses and food and teenagers and everything in between…and…eventually we got to the reading part. 🙂
I legitimately have tears in my eyes as I’m typing this, because Maria has become such a dear friend and inspiration to me.
She’s taught me that it’s never too late to learn something new or try something hard (especially learning to read in English when your first language is Spanish). She’s taught me it’s ok to cry (she has the kindest heart in the entire world).
She’s taught me that in an era of fiery personalities, divisive opinions, and front and center merit for being “the best,” there’s a quiet, steady power in working hard every day to make your way in a world that most likely won’t ever notice, or reward, you.
And she’s definitely taught me to be more grateful for the opportunities I’ve had in life that too often I take for granted.
The first day that Maria read her first “real” word (it was ‘mat’), she stopped, shook her head, and with absolute awe in her voice kept repeating: wow, wow, wow. She couldn’t believe she was reading. (I was biting my lip HARD under my mask to keep myself from bawling that day.) Now, she’s reading full stories with dialogue and plots and characters. She told me that she feels like a whole new world has been opened to her now that she can read.
She just finished this book about brave Clara Barton. But to me, Maria is the bravest of all. She has defied circumstances stacked against her that would spell devastation for most of us, and she has done so with integrity, kindness, and endless, endless hard work. I’m so grateful to know her.
4. Halloween (cough, hater)
Are you a Halloween lover or hater?
I’m in the hater camp. I’m sorry if that causes some of you shock, dismay, disappointment, and horror. I just don’t find many redeemable qualities in this holiday. I’m a Verified Halloween Scrooge.
Except for, sometimes, the food. Like, the cutesy monster cookie type food.
Some years, we’ll decorate these fun little spooky houses (or a kit from Trader Joe’s or Costco). And if I’m really on my A-game, on Halloween night we’ll do dinner in a pumpkin or these mummy dogs.
Do you have any fun Halloween food traditions?
{P.S. Before anyone gets really worried, yes, my kids go trick-or-treating, but the process of finding a costume around here is…very much a create-your-own type situation.}
5. I’ve Gotta Know
Someone told me recently you can tell a lot about a person whether they wear crocs in public or not.
So. I have to know. Do you??
I do. Unashamedly. My kids have had crocs for years. I’ve had no real strong opinion about them. Earlier this year, they got me a pair for Mother’s Day.
And.
I wear them constantly. I hope we can still be friends.
Tell me your deep, dark thoughts about crocs. This is a judgment free zone.
6. Believe it or Not
This second son of mine is turning 16 a week from today. Many of you have been around since he was just four years old. (INSANE IN THE MEMBRANE.)
He’s evolved into a hilarious, witty, smart, hard-working young man who loves to take selfies on my phone during church while I’m painfully playing my way through the hymns on the organ.
I have a few ideas up my sleeve for his birthday but I can’t type them out here, because I know from regular comments left on my blog that he and his friends often read here during math class (ahem, BOYS, get back to work!).
Please share any of your sweet sixteen birthday ideas below!
7. Catch Up and Struggles
Catching up from the last Friday Thought’s post:
- Thank you for all the planner recommendations! I seriously spent hours researching different planners for next year. I’m not sure what I’ll settle on yet, but you definitely gave me some great ideas. You’re the best. (Some of the most common recommendations were Passion Planners, Emily Ley planners, Golden Coil, Planner Pads, Erin Condren, In the Leafy Treetops, bullet journals/planners, Plum Paper, Jordan Page productivity planners and a few others!)
- Also, we started watching Crash Landing on You on Netflix like hundreds of you suggested. 🙂 My boys didn’t stick around long, but Brian and I have liked it a lot. It’s quirky and funny and unique. Highly recommend!
I don’t talk about my personal struggles much on here, but for me, 2021 has been a hard year. I know I’m not alone. It’s been a difficult couple of years for the entire world! For me, 2021 has been filled with difficulties and stresses and challenges and heartache that have kind of rocked my foundation on a lot of levels.
I deleted these paragraphs a million times because I don’t want this to be a call for attention or a sympathy plea. Mostly, I just want to acknowledge that sometimes online and social media posts do a really good job of masking real life and real challenges. But I feel like it is important to acknowledge that life (and mental health) rarely fit into a neat, pretty little box.
If you’ve had a hard year (or years), just know that you aren’t alone. I’m slowly and stubbornly learning that it’s ok to admit I’m not ok. That’s a monumental step for me. And after getting awkwardly ghosted by a therapist earlier this year, I’m finally brave enough (I think!) to try again so I can get some help sorting through the chaos in my brain and bolster some puny coping skills.
Thanks for being here. I say that a lot, but I really, really mean it.
I am certainly grateful for all of you that allow me to be very, very human even when society seems to prize and reward unsustainable and misleading perfection. I’m so grateful YOU are real and beautifully imperfect, too.
Love your guts.
190 Comments on “Friday Thoughts”
One of my favorite quotes is from the song, “Anthem” by Leonard Cohen:
Ring the bells that still can ring
Forget your perfect offering
There is a crack, a crack in everything
That’s how the light gets in
We are all cracked, wounded, and a work in progress. Being open and sharing is how the healing can occur. You’re a beautiful soul, Mel. Thank you for sharing your struggles. It lets us know we are not alone in the challenges.
Thank you Mel, for talking about mental health. I struggle with depression and had an especially hard time during the quarantine. It’s being brave and sharing our stories that bring healing. Admitting you need help is so important too.
Thanks for reinforcing that we are not alone!
And, your piglets are adorable! I’m sure I’d watch them all day too.❤️
Thanks for sharing Maria’s story. That is your story too. You made the world a better place for her, and you. ng
I missed reading this but had to come back–because I just love you, Mel! You’ve inspired me many times in many ways. I love your story about Maria.
I agree completely with your Halloween thoughts.
I think Crocs are ugly but totally wear them too…functionality over fashion for me every time!
Thanks for hanging in there and continuing to be your positive self despite the hard years.
Hi Mel,
Love this site, your recipes, friday thoughts, piglets, and your honesty…. Hate Halloween and neutral on crocs.
I admire you greatly and while no life is perfect I love how you embrace your life with all the messy – I bet you have a great laugh!
Thank you for sharing your recipes and your life….reading your site is a highlight for me!
Mel, thank you for being so fun and so real. I love the memes- Yes to all of it! And the piglets! *Swoon* So cool that you get to help Maria and she in turn has blessed your life too. Thank you for helping us all be inspired by her amazing-ness! And thank you for being real about Halloween!!!! I know people who LOVE it and I have wanted to love it too for so long but I really just don’t (I feel this pressure to make it fun for my family but I would prefer to curl up and watch a non-scary movie) and it’s sooooo nice to know that I’m not alone. I also invite my children to pull out the halloween boxes and figure out their costumes. 🙂
I don’t wear crocks ever but that’s mostly cuz I have feet issues and have to wear special, expensive shoes all the time!
And lastly, I am a HUGE fan of counseling and have been blessed for many years in having a great counselor. Self care and mental health affect everything in our lives and I’m glad we are slowly destigmatizing mental health and asking for help! Thanks for normalizing it! Love your recipes and your realness and your Friday Thoughts posts! (Sorry about the long comment- I just wanted to react to everything in your post! :))
I love how real you are. It’s you that keeps me coming back to your blog even more than the recipes. I have been a consistent follower of your blog since the beginning. (I think I found you with a link from a post by Erin on Sister’s Cafe and I’ve been a devoted fan ever since. Fun fact- I have become a vegetarian and I don’t really eat sugar, yet I read every post you put up.
Your story about Maria was so touching. I love her as if I know her. You have a gift for writing in a personal, connective way that allows all of us to feel apart of your experiences.
Your pigs are adorable! I am intentionally not showing my kids the pictures because I know that they would beg to have one of their own. I kind of want to beg my husband for one!
I’m a Halloween hater and a Crocs hater too. (Sorry)
My kids get their first cell phone and a set of keys to the kid car when they turn 16.
Thank you for being consistent with this blog! I don’t know how you do it with all of the demands of family life, but I’m so grateful that you do. You are a bright spot in my life.
Thank you Mel! I love your Friday posts! I didn’t think I liked crocs until I found myself wearing my 11 year old sons … all the time….:) Let me know what planner you end up with 🙂 Love your posts and your recipes!
Oh and Crocs are my summer go to. I have some fancy blue paisley ones that I wore out and asked for new ones for Christmas last year. Love the crochet idea!
What a wonderful post. I loved all of it. I love the piggies. I love Maria. I saved Crash Landing to watch. I hate Halloween I appreciate your transparency. I feel like I have been ghosting you unintentionally. It’s been a rough year and it is nice to know we aren’t alone. My husband is 36 days sober. I couldn’t be more grateful and am coming out of the fog. Sometimes things feel impossible. And sometimes the impossible becomes possible but only through hard work, therapy and and by doing the hard things. Don’t give up. I’m with ya still.
Thank you for sharing that you have struggled. I am often convinced i’m the only one. It’s hard, but it’s even harder when you feel so alone. Your words matter and I hope better days are ahead.
I love your Maria story. I am privileged enough to be able to work with people with hard stories and persevering spirits at my job as a Public Health Nurse. You get a whole new perspective on life learning about what some people have had to overcome.
I was always a Halloween hater. 3/4 of my kids were due around Halloween. I always said, “any day but Halloween!!” when I was pregnant. Well……..you guessed it. #4, our little witch Hazel, was born on 10/31/17. Halloween is a special day for us now
Me and my whole family unashamedly wear crocs everywhere in public. If anyone reading this was hiking in the Smokies this summer and saw a family of 6 sporting a rainbow of crocs…yep, that was us.
No shame in self care. I’ve done several stints of counseling through the years, and medication has got me through the worst of times. I see both work wonders for so many people.
I love your posts. Food, Friday Thoughts, anything. Still my favorite blogger ever. Deer hunters are getting served your fajitas and spaghetti sauce this week. Thank you!!!
*I am using that same book right now to teach my 4YO to read because he wanted to learn — and I tell you, there is nothing in the world like seeing the light come on and the pride in his eyes when he reads a word (or a whole story! we are on lesson 42 tomorrow!) to me. I am humbled by Maria’s willingness to ask for help and to struggle with something that has to be incredibly difficult! And she’s reading now! That’s AMAZING.
*Crocs are not something I love, but my kids do! My 4YO is asking for Mickey Mouse Crocs for Christmas. He’s adorable.
*Halloween is not my fave. But My two youngest love it, so we get to do the fun, friendly, neighborly-style Halloween stuff, and I like that because my two littler kids love it so much.
*I love the piglets! They are incredibly cute.
*I am the pigeon. I relate to that so much!
*I love what you had to say about mental health. I have struggled with disordered eating for many years and recently started doing some group coaching to try to help myself. It is amazing what a mental boost it gives me to acknowledge that I am worth spending money and time on. I am finally doing something that will help me gain some peace with eating, body image, and my relationship with myself. I am coached with two other women who are facing the same struggle, and it constantly brings me to tears to hear someone else describe the exact thoughts and feelings I have about food, dieting, and myself. I know that it makes me feel less alone to be able to talk about this challenge. I still struggle and have hard days, but I feel so much hope, which has been missing from my mental landscape for a long while.
Thanks for your Friday thoughts! I love these posts!
Mel, I’m late to the party since I haven’t been on computer recently. I don’t wear crocs because the arches hurt my feet on the only ones I ever tried on. However, I do wear easy spirit mules all the time. I’m all for comfort instead of worrying about style, but that could be because I’m 70+ and a cranky old lady on the subject. I wear comfy clothes and could care less about style.
Do take care of yourself mentally and emotionally. I’ve learned through a long and occasionally troubled life that sometimes survival is victory. You just have to get through the bad patches and win through to the better times.
Congratulations to both you and Maria. Reading is one of my joys in life and I am so glad you helped open that door for her.
I’m not fond of Halloween although I do keep some treats on hand for the kids. I’m ready to start celebrating Thanksgiving which gets a bum deal in my opinion sandwiched in between Halloween and Christmas which both get lots of attention it seems.
Thank you for being you and sharing all your life with us.
1- Maria- what a beautiful story and experience, Mel!
I’ve used that book to teach my kids. I have them sign and date the last page when they finish it.
2- Halloween- I like the fun, cute traditions (pumpkin patch, fall treats, fun/ silly music), but definitely not a fan of the creepy, scary stuff. My kids will trade in candy for legos or money, and we either donate it or I save it for movie nights, etc.
3- 16-year-old birthday- depending on the personality, but we did a very simple surprise party for both of our boys when they turned 16. Had friends, pizza, cake, and let them play games. My 15 yr old just threw a party for his friend (because he’s sure 16 means surprise party) and is looking forward to his “surprise” next year. I also like the idea of doing a fun activity (escape room, try local things to do on Groupon).
4- My feet don’t do crocs, but I have plenty of other things I wear that are the in the “spirit” of crocs.
5- Mental health- YES TO THIS! You are wise to recognize the need for help. I agree to make sure you get a good fit! The last 1.5 years have been some of the hardest (for so many different reasons). I have a few Instagram accounts that I follow that have been an additional resource: somaticexperienceingint, heybobbibanks, sitwithsharon, and pyschotherapy.central.
Those piglets are so adorable! I have “piglet envy” for sure.
Maria- heartwarming story
Halloween-like and dislike.
Crocs- no thanks, Need more arch support for my feet
16 yr old son bday ideas? Laser tag with friends, escape room, bonfire?
‘Stay-at-home’ mom is one of the hardest jobs (even though very rewarding in many ways) No salary, promotion, or recognition. Talk about flying under the radar. No offense to working moms. Definitively trade-offs both ways.
Music is a great therapy for me. Look up lyrics to ‘Only Jesus’ by Casting Crowns. It sums up life quite well.
Okay, my favorite around the house flip flop is the Crocs Reviva. I own more than one pair! They’re so comfy and help my plantar fasciitis riddled heels not hurt so bad. Mel, your story about Maria is inspiring. I have a special needs son and I know that sense of ‘opening the world’ to him through the ability to read. What a wonderful gift it is to be able to read! Thanks for being authentic and for showing that vulnerability is okay. I hate being vulnerable – but I’m learning that growth and blessings usually follow after it. Love this recipe site, I’ve been around for years and I’m not going anywhere!
I forgot to say, I am a Croc lover. I even wore them last year in our family pictures. They are a lovely shade of green. Just so ya know my type.
I totally feel the pigeon meme. That is me, but because I stay up to chat with my night owl husband and teenagers and then have a teething 16 month that sometimes keeps me up at night and/or gets me up early. I’m trying to soak in all of the people while they are still all here!! I’ve just resigned myself to always feeling tired. I can sleep after I die. The piglets are super cute to die for though. Definitely worth losing sleep over.
Why is it so much harder to give gifts when kids get older? I’m afraid I am not much help with the sweet sixteen. Something he may not appreciate now, but definitely later might be a hand-written letter that expresses all the things that are sometimes harder to get out. Also, what is his love language? Focus on that, maybe.
Your story about Maria had me choked up and feeling so grateful from the beginning. What an amazing experience for you both. These kinds of stories fill my heart with hope. You are a rock star. And along those lines, I love how real you are on here. It endears you to me more. I hope you can find something that clicks for you with counseling and the rest of what you are working for. It is definitely a day in, day out battle. It is definitely easier by being open and sharing these hard realities with others. So thank you. We can all gain someone sharing.
And I am definitely in the Halloween hate club. My kids love it so much that I try. But I would rather focus it around all the best food than the trick or treating or candy, so yeah. Let’s move on to the other holidays which feel so much better in my heart.
You are a light! Thank you for taking the time to share your life.
“I totally feel the pigeon meme. That is me, but because I stay up to chat with my night owl husband … then have a teething 16 month that sometimes keeps me up at night and/or gets me up early. … And I am definitely in the Halloween hate club. My kids love it so much that I try. But I would rather focus it around all the best food than the trick or treating or candy, so yeah. Let’s move on to the other holidays which feel so much better in my heart. ”
This is me! Change 16 months to 22 months, and I would have thought I wrote it. Always nice to know there are others out there dealing with the same things. Here’s wishes that teething passes quickly, and the excitement that Nov. 1st is just around the corner 🙂
I love that your husband is the kind of person that Maria thought of and could go to when needing help. I think that really shows his character.
While I don’t love the overabundance of junk food or the scary gory part of Halloween, I do live the friendliness and neighborliness of Halloween. At least here in Arizona where the weather is great it is the perfect time to get out and get to know the neighbors. Everyone sits out in their driveway and the parents get to chat as they take their kids around. We have gotten to know so many people on Halloween. Also, what a great holiday that people buy bags of candy to give away to strangers with no expectation of anything in return.
I feel you with the pigeon meme! I have 5 kids 1.5-11. between the 1.5 and 4 year old, sleep is never great. Add in running everyone else around and my baby decided overnight not to nap anymore; it’s rough. I’d so love to eat healthy and exercise and lose some of this baby weight- as well as stay on top of mom/wife/homemaker life- but right now, I’m just in survival mode. I’m trying to be ok with doing what I can and letting go of the rest.
I also acknowledge that there are many positive and wonderful things in my life. I’m truly blessed.
Thanks for being willing to share your thoughts and feelings. Social media/websites and such can mask so many struggles. It’s helpful for all of us to see the humanity of others and that life is hard for all of us in different ways.
Last note, definitely in Halloween hater camp over here! I hate the fear aspect, the morbid displays people think are ok to put up in their front yard for children to see, and managing hordes of candy afterwards. November 1st is one of the happiest days of the year 🙂 We do, however LOVE pumpkin carving (like detailed ones that take hours and use carving tools outside carving kits). It’s kind of an obsession, and definitely the highlight of the season!
Mel –
This post just made me love you even more. I’ve been around since your second son was 4 – where does the time go?!? My kids are also in their teenage years (13 & 15) and it just blows my mind all the time.
Maria – this made me just cry over my toast in all the best way. You both changed each other and shared an experience that just cracked you open to love and community even more. She is an absolute treasure and please let her know love and light is being sent from Indiana.
Crocs – I broke my foot, wicked bad about four years ago and have never been able to be comfortable on hardwood floors without some padding. Enter the croc. Ugly, deliciously soft on your foot bed and a back strap to catch the heal. I own 2 outdoor pairs and 1 indoor pair. I have a deep obsession for always finding the best shoe for my feet.
Your piglets are adorable and I love watching the reels.
I love Halloween. But don’t do any type of food that is cool/cute. I make chili and cornbread for our family and the kids hit the neighborhood while we pass out the candy. This year I crafted monstera leaves to be a house plant.
And thanks for sharing that this has been a hard year. I think admitting your hards also make others recognize their hards are normal. We are all living the same cycles at different times in different ways. This year was medium for me in levels of hardness, I feel like I have been doing the work on myself these past few years and am seeing some personal growth.
You have had a lot of heartbreak this year and sifting through grief and trauma while addressing all the life stuff that is demanded on a daily basis, well it is hard to breath sometimes. Much less alone, feel all the feelings. You are doing amazing – showing up and sharing. You’re a gift.
Side note – Have you ever listened to the podcast, We Can Do Hard Things?
I have found it to be delightful. Wanted to share.
And recently watched – Same Kind Of Different As Me on the Netflix and it just was great. You may like it.
Lots of love to you and your lovely family!!
Your coping skills are not puny. LOOK AT YOUR LIFE!
Thanks for sharing your highs and lows, Mel.
Crocs – I cannot wear them due to plantar fasciitis. Vionic brand of shoes is all I wear because they are made to treat this condition and honestly, hurting feet ruins my day. Plus crocs are ugly. 🙂
Halloween – when my girls were trick or treating age, it was a complete pain. Costumes be d@mned. One year I even sewed a mouse costume in polar fleece because we live in freaking Minnesota. The only thing I liked about it was carving pumpkins because 1) I like candles and 2) the roasted seeds are the bomb.
2021 – I was doing pretty good until I got covid and yes, I took all precautions and got the vaccine because it was preached. No offense, but until you’ve had it, you don’t have a clue. Me included! It has affected my mental health so I am now getting some support. There is no shame in that, Mel.
Other than that, I am looking forward to the day when I have enough energy to make a fall favorite, apple crisp.
Hugs to you and give a couple smooches to those piglets. They are mighty adorable!
Love your Friday Thoughts posts! They help me refocus and smile and feel “normal” for not being normal in a wonderful, non-judgmental way!
Maria – absolutely precious!! If only the world was full of more people like her, willing to work quietly behind the scenes. I’m a homeschooling mom of four….no one is ever going to write a book about me, my college alma mater doesn’t want to feature me in the quarterly updates, and I don’t even have a blog. Yet, my goal is to be known as Maria is known: for quiet tenacity, perseverance, and integrity.
Crocs – I have huge feet. Size 11 wide. I also have primary lymphedema. So, Crocs are a no for me. I need something with excellent fit and appropriate tightness. I.e. New Balance cross trainers. But, some of my favorite people in the world wear them – and I wholeheartedly support!
Halloween – ugh. I didn’t like it as a little girl. Demand people give me candy or else I’ll play a trick on them? How rude! (Yes, I was that kind of four year old.) Celebrate ugliness and evil? There’s enough of it in every day life! (Yes, I was that kind of teenager.) Walpurgisnacht?! Nope, not going near Halloween now! (Yes, I was the weird German major in college.) So…..we don’t observe Halloween. However, we eat October Treats all throughout the month (candy corns) which is highly unusual for this Mama to hand out candy willy nilly throughout the day! And we have a fun German theme dinner on the 31st and discuss Martin Luther. My kids love open face sandwiches, sauerkraut, rye bread, and Apfelschorle! And then we enjoy a bag of candy for dessert. Haha!
Piglets – we absolutely love seeing the baby pigs at the State Fair. We are also the family that doesn’t even have a dog. (My youngest thinks she will need therapy later for being denied a basic necessity of life….) I’m impressed at all you do!
Idea for Next Post – how do you stay so fit?!? If I made all your goodies all the time like you must do for the blog……it just wouldn’t be pretty. We eat homemade, fairly healthy balanced meals every night and
desserts are only once a week in this house – and I still struggle with my weight! What is your secret? 🙂
Big hugs to you!!!!
MEL. Lots of therapists have red flags so here are some i have noticed: you do NOT want a therapist that will talk about themselves during the session, (like a few examples here and there are fine but constant stories…no). You also do not want one one that will agree with you most of the time or one that doesnt try to ween you off. There has to be a goal of you being independent and commitments set for you to report back on each week. Therein lies the growth and healing. Just want to help you avoid some of my very wasted time and money. Sigh. Good luck and you can do this! 🙂
Also YES I WEAR CROCS IN PUBLIC AND THEY CAME WITH BLINGY FLOWERS when i bought them. White crocs and rose gold flower charms. The Radiant Clog is the name i think. I love them. Croc lovers, unite!
I am a HUGE advocate for therapy and taking care of your mental health. Do it! So important! If you broke your arm/leg, etc you wouldn’t think twice about going to the doctor, getting medicine to help and physical therapy. Mental health should not be any different–speaking from a mom of 4 that all have had mental health issues–see the therapist, talk to your doctor and get some meds if needed, get enough sleep. exercise and good diet. They all are so important! Love you Mel! You are amazing!!! Love your teaching Maria to read! That is amazing!
Mel, You have a heart of gold and I wish I could be your neighbor. I could use a really great neighbor right now. Thank you for helping Maria. What a beautiful gift you’ve been to each other. Thanks for taking time to do that. I’ve been struggling with anxiety lately too. I finally found an amazing therapist for my teenager. I hope you find someone too. I should probably find one for myself. Sending a big hug! Life is a lot, sometimes.
I love your last line “Life is a lot, sometimes.” It’s so TRUE! What a simple way to sum up how hard it is to get through each day. I want a T-shirt now with that line on it.
Mel, we have so much in common but it appears Crocs and Halloween are not among them! Boo. But 2020 and 2021 have been incredibly hard for me too, making me face the reality that I needed counseling (again) and a good anti-anxiety or anti-depressant medication. It takes time to find the right counselor and/or medication. I am finally using a NP of Psychiatry and she’s great. They specialize in how you are feeling. (Meridian Advanced Psychiatry)
I hope you find the right tools to help you through these troubled times. It’s ok to not always be ok.
Mel, I love your recipes and these posts. I also loved chatting at the cross country meet. I don’t have a lot to add, but I am a Halloween hater. I seriously hate everything about it. I do take my kids trick or treating, but they piece their costumes together from the hand me downs in the dress up bin. I rarely plan a festive meal and I loathe dealing with all of the candy they bring home.
It has been a hard year. I find myself spending most afternoons just sitting in silence while my little one naps. I feel like I’m healing from the trauma of non stop noise and needs from my kids for the last year and a half. I should also seek out a counselor, but haven’t yet. I hope you are able to find someone who is a good fit for you.
“I find myself spending most afternoons just sitting in silence while my little one naps. I feel like I’m healing from the trauma of non stop noise and needs from my kids for the last year and a half.”
YES. Stephanie I don’t know you but YES. I can SO relate. It’s been rough!!!
Mel, you are a good, good human. Thank you for being you, consistently.
My favorite part of this whole post and maybe of anything that I’ve read lately is this (from the Maria section): “there’s a quiet, steady power in working hard every day to make your way in a world that most likely won’t ever notice, or reward, you.” My mom is an immigrant with an amazing story of tenacity and hard work who didn’t face such challenges as Maria, although arriving here at age 17 alone with $200 in hand and no English or driving skills is significantly challenging. But my mom quickly learned to read and speak English and thus had many opportunities. I see a the same hero in Maria as I do in my mom. Thanks for sharing. And as for 2021, oh boy. All I will say, is that I’m right there with you. What a year. Harder in some respects than 2020.
Mel – I am grateful for your recipes, your Friday thoughts and your perspective.
I’m actually going to follow up on your January 2021 post. You mentioned getting rashes from all natural deodorants and many of your readers agreed. I’ve had that struggle as well and actually needed to give up trying for over 3 years because of the rashes. Your post inspired me to try again.
I saw an ad (probably somewhere on social media) for Lume deodorant. It was created by a Minnesota doctor and she left out the main ingredient in all natural deodorants that cause rashes, baking soda. I ordered 5 sample tubes, but was still hesitant given how badly I had broken out in the past. Finally, in mid-August I bit the bullet and gave the first tube a try. It has been 2 months now and NO RASH. I highly recommend giving Lume a try. I have been so pleased.
2021 has not been an easy year. I think so many people are struggling and don’t feel comfortable talking about it. Your honesty is appreciated. Thank you.
Agreed! I use Lume because it works. I also use Little Seed Farm deodorants because there is no baking soda in their formulas, and they smell amazing. The activated charcoal is my fav scent I love them!! Small goat farm, check them out. Plus NO PLASTIC.
Love Lume!!!! Both myself and my teenagers use it and we love it!
I love these posts! Halloween… I keep it low key, because I like the snack packs of candy but that’s it. Crocs… nope! I have narrow feet, and just walk right out of them. Piglets… enjoying your stories on IG! And I love that you are being brave and honest about your struggles with mental health this year. Praying you find the help you’re looking for.
Oh my goodness, all you wonderful souls, I have read all of your comments and just want to say thank you for taking the time to comment and share and just BE HERE. I appreciate you more than you know. Thanks for the recommendations and tips and just everything that you shared. I love that there are so many Halloween fans! And so many just like me. Haha. I love that so many of you were like “no, way, not crocs, not ever” but also could care less if others wear them. And big shoutout to all my crocs wearers out there. Thank you for sharing your hearts and being vulnerable in the experiences you offered. Anyway, I just appreciate you. All of you.
Thank you for keeping it real, Mel. My 2021 started off poorly and it has only gone downhill. But I keep the song from Annie in my head—maybe the sun will come out tomorrow.
The very best ahead to you and your family. They sound like good kids, just kids. And Maria—what a treasure. I can learn much from her.
Piglets! – I am so glad I follow your Faux Farm. I love the piglets and look for them daily. Thanks for giving me a daily smile.
Maria – I love that you gave of your time and helped her out. She will never forget your help.
Halloween – Hater – I have never been into dressing up, but I have been required to lately. My costumes are always meh… I am hoping that I can skip this year.
Crocs – I have never tried them and no one in my family wears them. Right now I hate all shoes. Been wearing insoles that a doctor recommended and I feel like I am walking on rocks. As my daughter says ‘You have sensitive feet’… Maybe I should try Crocs.
The last few years have been rough for everyone, but for different reasons. I am so looking forward to 2022 and hoping it is a better year. I am working on boundaries, productivity, etc.
I’m struggling with a planner, but I think that is because I realize I need a custom planner – bullet journal so I can dump everything on my to do/ wish list, calendar to keep track of events, etc, etc.
Our number one recipe is the Garlic Alfredo Sauce. There is currently some in the fridge.
I have been using your blog practically daily for years and haven’t commented much, but wanted to say thank you for it! You have often helped me feel like a rockstar in the kitchen. 😉 Thank you for this post, your Friday thoughts are often some of my favorites. First of all, pigs?! You truly are my hero now. I also have five kids and have been holding out on getting a dog, and they never let me hear the end of it. I don’t want ANOTHER living thing to take care of, so you’re officially even more my hero. Lastly, thank you for your transparency. We can probably all relate to heartache and life struggles, and I mean it when I say I will be praying for you. May you feel God’s presence in the midst of your struggle in a new and fresh way. His light always overcomes the darkness. Blessings!
I’m definitely a Halloween Hater. I buy a bag of candy at Costco and my kids get to eat it. Done.
My son’s 16th birthday was a few months ago. He wanted a big bonfire on the beach and s’mores, playing games with the family, and hamburgers to eat. I made him a chocolate peppermint cake. It was an easy birthday, and he was happy.
Maria – I love that you follow your heart and give so generously of your time and energy. Truly Christlike!
Halloween – Hater – definitely. I love candy, but that does not make up for the stress of costumes, ha-ha! I’m glad my kids are getting older and can do more of that on their own.
Crocs – As I get older I have decided that comfort is key. I don’t care what I look like, as long as I am comfortable. I wear socks with sandals because it works for me; you wear crocs and enjoy 🙂
Mental Health – so important to take care of yourself mentally. Good luck finding the right therapist for you!
Thank you for sharing you AND your recipes. Love your guts!
“Normal is a setting on the washer” Remember that one? Also “I’m ok you’re ok we’re all … Let’s just say “NOT” at the end of that one. Have myself had crushing heartaches that still hurt a lot. Still I see others horrendous struggles and I become ashamed for feeling down. Growing being the necessary challenge that it is less we stagnate or deny our weaknesses. Means a lot of wake-up calls. The plus is we get wiser, stronger, and we run to the Shepherd more! So glad to hear of your selfless gift of time to help Maria! Sounds like her success and sweetness is your reward. Sending you a hug we all can sure use more of those<3 Olivia's piglets are adorable ;0
“Normal is a setting on the washer.” I love that and am going to use it all the time now!
Thank you for sharing about your friend Maria, what an inspiration!
I have such fond memories of my mom and I planning costumes together which she would usually make and I do enjoy doing that with my kids also. (Well most of the time I enjoy sewing them, but there has been times at 1 am I have wondered why I spend more time making the costumes than they will actually spend wearing them.) We do have a fun tradition we stole from my niece and her husband. We do spaghetti for dinner and a drink with dry ice. The fun part is no one gets regular plates, utensils, or cups. We pick random things to eat on and with – pan lids, whisks, tongs, measuring spoons, etc. It’s dinner and entertainment all in one.
Also, this is off topic, but I started following Lift and Love because of you and am grateful for you sharing their account. I also thought the video you did for them was really perfect. Your message was so good and your love for everyone was so evident.
Loved every word! I love relating in all of our similar and different struggles. Thanks for making the world better in all your many ways.
Thank you for sharing Mel! I loved reading this whole post….you seem like such an amazing person. A relatable, kind, thoughtful, brave person. I appreciated your words on mental health, it’s something that so many struggle with. Thanks for bringing more awareness. ❤️❤️❤️
16 year old birthdays….
For our son- We treated him to an Escape Room. We live in a pretty small town so he, his dad, and a few friends made a day of it by driving to Phoenix and having dinner after. It was a hit.
For our daughter- We secretly set up to have a close friend who lives out of town, and that she rarely gets to see, stay with us for a few days. That was “the best”, according to our daughter.
Looking forward to hearing what you decide to do! Sounds like he’s a great kid.
These are really helpful ideas!
I’m a soon to be an 80 years old woman. It’s just my husband and me – and our little rescue terrier. 😉 You are like a breath of fresh air… You’re warm and welcoming and I so enjoy reading little tidbits about you, your family and life with the farm animals. Your stories bring joy to my heart… 🙂
Your story about Maria and helping her learn to read was awesome and brought a tear to my eyes. A big warm hug and thank you for sharing a snippet of your life.
do you have a recipe for the chocolate dessert with eyes ?
I love your Friday thoughts so much. Thanks for sharing.
I’m a Halloween hater. 1000%. It doesn’t help that three of my kids have birthdays within a week of Halloween and it’s hard to want to whip up a cake when candy is coming out of their ears already. My oldest turns 16 the day after Halloween this year and all he wants is money so I’m lost as to how to make it special. ♀️
You’re a highlight of the internet, Mel. Love your guts! (PS- I’m not a fan of the Jordan Page planner- I find mine physically too huge to manage and I’m annoyed filling in the times for the blocks every day. I wouldn’t buy it again.)
Mel,
Ok so first of all, your son who is turning 16 is Brien’s twin.
I don’t own a pair of crocks so therefor I can’t wear them in public but don’t judge who do.
As I tell by seniors in my Sunday School class almost every week, stop comparing yourselves to others, whether it’s in spiritual ways to secular ways. We are all awesome in our own ways and should stay in our own lane and stop looking at other’s achievements. I tell them there will always be someone more handsome /pretty, there will always be someone who makes more money than you, there always be someone who you think has a better job than you so just be YOUR best self and achieve your own goals. And same goes for spiritual growth, Heavenly Father doesn’t compare us to anyone, nor should we. He is happy as long as we’re on His path no matter where we are on that path.
Your willingness to help Maria read with ALL that you already have on your plate is the sweetest, kindest and one of the most charitable acts of service I’ve known. You’re a rock star Mel I’m so many ways an I hope there are many days where you know that !
And I’m so glad you’re finally watching Crash Lansing on You. Because if that shoe my husband will only watch Kdramas now!
Crash Landing on You was our introduction to k-dramas as well! Oo, have you seen I Am Not a Robot? We loved that one.
Strong Woman Bong Soon was also pretty good, and we’ve just started Welcome to Waikiki and it is absolutely hilarious so far!
Mel,
What an inspiration you are! The story about Maria made me cry and want to do more to help others. You are making the world a better place. I’m a dietitian, cooking teacher, mom and food lover and your website is the first place I go for everything. You’re the whole package. I live in Meridian and keep hoping I’ll run into you at Trader Joe’s one of these days, even if you are wearing crocs. Continue to fight the fight, we need Mel her recipes and her goodness in our lives.
Mel, thank you for being real and sharing bits of your real life here. It makes me feel more normal, which is good, because sometimes the Internet has too many perfect pictures if you know what I mean.
I LOVED loved loved your story about Maria. She is definitely one of the many many unsung heroes in our world that don’t get nearly enough credit.
I usually love Halloween but am feeling a little more scroogish about it this year haha.
Crocs: real talk… I think they are hideous and tacky and I’ve never owned a pair hahaha. But, I’m also one of those weird people that firmly believe leggings are NOT pants and I think they’re tacky and not flattering on anyone either, so feel free to judge me haha.
You’re awesome and your recipes are awesome!!
Leanne said it all. Especially the observation on leggings – I’m also one of those weird people!! I’ve tried on Crocs, they were soooo uncomfortable!
I was thinking about Maria’s story while I made dinner, and a song popped into my head that I haven’t heard in years. It is a country song that is so similar to Maria’s story that I thought I need to share it with you. It’s called Billy Can’t Read by Paul Overstreet.
Here is a link if you want to listen to it:
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=s43Cgg8nQso&ab_channel=GuitarNewby
Thank you for all you do!
Thank you for your thoughts! You are amazing. You inspire me every time I read these posts. Thank you for taking the time to put down in words all the things that are on our minds but never say…
Our favorite Halloween meal is chili and scones. My boys who are 21 & 18 wear crocs all the time, I think I need a pair too.
Greetings to you and yours! You are a caring, loveable sweetheart.
I so love reading the emails you write like this. When I was 16 yrs old, my parents were already divorced, I had a birthday party when I was 12, then no more anything. I know your children know how lucky they are. And if you want to wear Crocs, you go girl. Take care…
Maybe Crocs are just what I need now, huh? Thanks for your many kindnesses and the three delicious soups. I loved the story of Maria! You are an amazing lady that I love and admire. Your boys are near perfect, but Camryn definitely is!!
Hang in there friend. Love your guts. Thanks for sharing and being vulnerable. ❤️
Haha- hate Halloween too- the costumes, the post-H candy debacle (let them go for it for two days? buy it from them? Throw a few pieces away every day? Ugh hate it) I’m inspired by both you and Maria- and my heart thoroughly enjoyed reading her story…mostly it feels troubled these days when I read…thank you for offering a light. It has been hard here too and I find comfort in knowing it’s not just me…thank you so much Mel, love your guts back❤️
I also am forced to painfully make my way through the hymns on the organ. It is torture—I’d rather do almost anything than that! Thanks for being real! Love everything you do!
Halloween- Love it! More so when my kids were small but I still love the decorations, parties etc. I collect Lemax spookytown houses and enjoy putting up my display every year.
Crocs- I do have a pair I wear for gardening but would never wear them out, but I won’t judge anyone that does LOL
Maria- You are a true and wonderful friend and she is an inspiration to all of us, how brave she was to ask for help, incredible lady!
Mental health- I think everyone has struggled this last year, its been so hard on all levels, I work in the health field and have seen people just break down, heartbreaking. I try to eat healthy (mostly), exercise, get enough sleep which has helped along with chocolate and the occasional iced coffee!
16th Birthday- I remember having 6 friends over for a cookout then we all went to a movie, after out for sundaes at Farrells then back home for a sleepover, a lot of fun. Not sure it would be exciting for a 16 yr old boy though LOL
Mel, you are the best, so sincere, honest, brave, considerate, witty, flexible and just the kind of friend everyone wants to have. Thank you for your huge heart of gold. I have been following you for years. Love your recipes, but love who are are, so genuine and sincere. This photo reminds me of the old snap shot Saturday days. God Bless you, Mel. You are a great person.
Getting a therapist was the best decision I made for myself in 2020. Go Mel! It is hard and intimidating. Your faux farm account is the best. Love your cute piggies and your donkeys and all the posts. It’s soothing and simple (although I know far from simple for you). Grateful for you and your sharing heart. Maria sounds like an amazing woman and I definitely cried reading about her. ❤️
Mel, you are amazing! I love your food and your real life posts. Thanks for sharing and putting yourself out there for Maria and all of us here.
As for Crocs I love the pair of women’s swiftwater Crocs I own and wear them all the time. My daughter’s each have a pair too. I’m a big believer in wearing what makes you comfortable.
I’m not a huge Halloween fan either. I get into it for the kids. Last year we came up with a new plan because of COVID and the kids are asking to do it again this year. We bought the Disney game Villainous and dressed up as the villains we each played (simple costumes that involved hats, wigs, coats etc) and we bought bags of our favorite candy and just played and ate and switched costumes when we started a new round of the game. It was a hit and they just came out with a new expansion I might have to get and get accessories to go with it.
Wishing you the best with your journey for healing.
Britney
Oh my goodness, Mel, reading about Maria made me emotional. What an incredible woman. And YOU for taking the time to teach her are just as incredible. I know you’re not looking for the credit, but that’s part of what makes you so wonderful. The piglets are darling and I’ve enjoyed watching you love them on Instagram. I have no crocs, but I would never think less or more of someone if they wore them in public! Your boys are growing so big and handsome. And thank you for being real and open with your mental health struggles. I don’t think there’s a person on earth with perfect physical health, and of course nobody with perfect mental health. We all need help from time to time. I wish help was more accessible! I never want anyone to struggle, but it sure makes a person relatable. Sending you love.
I used to be a Halloween hater. I don’t like scary stuff. But my kids love Halloween. I have more Halloween decorations than Christmas now. We decorate the house – kid level scary. We love truck or treating. We have the pumpkin shaped pizza from Papa Murphy’s with root beer every year on Halloween. Oh we also go to the pumpkin patch every October.
I just got my first pair of Crocs a couple days ago. I wear them as house shoes (due to feet issues I can’t walk barefoot). I will admit I think they are ugly as all get out but pretty comfy, but I will never wear them out of the house!
I love your openness about your feelings and mental health issues. Your example makes it easier for others to own up to their problems. I realized I was quite depressed during the isolation that came from Co-vid regulations and quarantines and didn’t recognize it until getting back to some normalcy.
I love Halloween, mostly for the fall colors, pumpkins, and food. None of the scary stuff though. Thanks for the delicious recipes and the cute pig stories!
Oh Mel – I love you! I used to come for all the recipes, now I come for the Friday thoughts! I have quite enjoyed following along with the arrival of your new piglets – I never knew I was a pig person until now! And most importantly – I love my Crocs and wear them all the time. I think I’ve reached the age that I literally don’t care what people think of my shoes! Thanks for sharing all areas of your life – not just the recipes! 🙂
Hi Mel, was thinking about you this week. A friend found out he had skin cancer on the side of his nose. Exactly like you! Now he has a dime sized hole there.
Anyways, one of our mutual friends does investigation of consumer products. She did one on chemical and mineral sunscreens for 2021, with the help of a nurse. . She explains which are bad, which are good. And why.
I thought you might like to see it. I’m now more informed. Will stay away from the nano technology! https://www.mamavation.com/beauty/best-non-toxic-sunscreens.htmlhttps://www.mamavation.com/beauty/best-non-toxic-sunscreens.html
Love your story about Maria. Love your recipes but most of all love you!!
Love the pigs! So cute! The story about Maria is truly inspiring. I would like the world to feel more like that story and less like the daily news cycle. Halloween? I don’t know if I LOVE it, but I like it. The foods are fun. We ALWAYS make pumpkin shaped (or other Halloween shaped) peanut butter cut out cookies. We frost with simple icing and then decorate with melted chocolate and sprinkles. Yum! It’s a tradition carried over from my childhood and the recipe still holds up as a fun and delicious treat. When the kids were younger, I’d bake up a big batch and they’d have their friends over to decorate them. We’ve had a blast over the years creating our kids’ costumes since they always seemed to pick something that you couldn’t buy (e.g., Hedwig (that was a lot of feathers to sew on) or a blue morpho
butterfly or Handy Manny before there were Handy Manny costumes. ) You get the idea. Now, I’m kind of sad because they are beyond the trick or treating years. Crocs? I used to manage a large retail business. (Now I manage a very small blog 😉 My old New York design team would scoff at anything that didn’t come from either Barney’s or Bergdorf’s. So Crocs would easily be worthy of a fashion arrest, lol! But, let me tell you, Crocs’ business is on FIRE! And while neither you nor I are looking at these particular celebrities for our own personal fashion cues, they’ve had super successful collaborations with Justin Bieber, Bad Bunny and Post Malone. I also believe there’s beauty in practicality. I haven’t worn traditional crocs out, but I have worn other versions at the beach. So much better than flip flops to protect your feet from frying on a long walk on hot sand. Finally, I have to say that, even with tough posts, you always seem to bring so much hope and light to my day. Being ghosted by a therapist is a shocking new level of ghosting. No sympathy…Instead I’ve got a universe full of empathy. I hope you find someone worthy to help you work through whatever you need to. Someone like you, who cares enough to reach out and help someone else simply because you know she needed it.
Hi Mel,
I relate to pretty much everything you wrote. My youngest son, of four children is Mr Koala. He bugs about how terrible school or just life is then you ask how you can help and he says never mind he’s fine. AARG!! I want to pull my hair out. This same son is turning 15 on Halloween. Btw, He hates Halloween and so do I. My kids and I have made a deal, they can dress up but they stay home and pass out candy while we celebrate my sons bday. In exchange I buy them multiple bags of candy they share. No trick or treating here, thank goodness!!
I also, love the story of Maria. She reminds me of my mother in-law. She came to this country with her husband and four children. Soon after he passed away at age 48, so my mother in-law had to go to work not knowing the english language. Such a hard life! The story I relate to the most is your last, mental health, I have four children, three of them have mental health issues. It has been alot of work getting them to doctors that they liked. This was the best way to get them to open up so the drs could give an accurate diagnosis. Good luck on your mental health journey. Remember there are people all over that care about you 🙂
So impressed how you were able to get doctors your kids liked and could help them! bravo! So hard to see our kids suffer, and so beautiful you could do this hard work to care for them and get them care three times over <3
Thank you Tina! Yes I was very grateful to find good help, my kids relate to happily 🙂
Well, my friend, (may I call you friend?) there is a lot to unpack in this post, every letter of it well worth the time and effort you put into writing it, and the time (and no effort) I spent reading. As a survivor of 2 years of weekly therapy, I always think everyone would benefit from at least some therapy, so no judgement on that here. Your darling friend Maria’s struggles and successes moved me to tears, too! So wonderful to read that one. The piggies and donkeys are too much fun, and I expect I’ll be wasting/spending lots of time watching & laughing at/with them. Can’t wait for the wee cow to appear! I live on half an acre in a slightly rural, mostly suburban are of SW Ohio, and we can’t have any farm animals at all. Not even chickens! When we moved here from SoCal, we had 3 great dogs, but they all died tragically within the first 3 years. Now we have a slightly crazy doxie/golden/??? mix who thinks he’s a cat and the floor is lava. Can’t stand to be on the floor if there’s a lap to occupy.
Sorry I’m meandering here, but your post moved me to write. I hope you’ll get some rest and some therapy, and that we’ll all (or most of us) will get through this godawful plague (and soon, please). Take good care of yourself while you take such good care of all those men and critters. God bless you real good.
Love,
J
Mel, you are just the best. Thanks for being vulnerable and keeping it real. You got this!!!
Ok this one made me cry. Maria?? Oh man.
I’ve already seen all the piglet content and can’t get enough!! So dang cute.
Crocs have been a staple in for home for the last 22 years. My 19 year old daughter has 13 pairs. That she bought with her own money. Their flip flops save my feet.
You continue to put out goodness in a time where it’s hard to find- thank you!!!
I do not wear crocs nor do my children but I’m definitely not mad at you or your family for doing so. When you can cook like you do, you can wear whatever you want!! I’m an enneagram 3 so wearing crocs does not sit well with my own personal style Also, this year “pushed” me into therapy as well and fortunately I’ve not been ghosted and found some great tools and dug deep and opened wide some of my thoughts and issues I didn’t know I had! Once you find the right therapist your life will be better for it!
Oh Mel. Thanks for sharing. And I’m so happy to know there are fellow Halloween Haters out there. I could write a book about how much I loathe icky yard decorations and gag at the smell of rubbery plastic masks and wigs. Don’t even get me started on fake gore. No other holiday gets a solid two months. Nope. I feel robbed and outraged when I see halloween paraphernalia in August. I digress.
You are an inspiration. Thanks for sharing about sweet Maria, what a fabulous story that keeps going! And pigs. I need a pig. And a donkey. Any time I need a recipe I type Mel’s… and it turns out great. Thank!
I’m sitting in a bit of shade, ever so grateful to be off my feet for a few minutes. I’m not feeling at all guilty that my husband has the kids (all finally old/tall enough to go together) on a ride at Disneyland. Grateful we can be here. Exhausted. Not looking forward to the drive home with tired peps and all their stinky shoes and laundry. Read your post and chuckled that for me “opportunities” to learn and grow have been covered in many layers of work, tears, mental, emotional, and spiritual exhaustion. My usually sunny disposition has had a really hard time keeping a “let’s learn from this” instead of just “let’s survive this” attitude this past 1 1/2 years.
Ah well.
Grace. That’s what we all need for ourselves, and to give (especially in the middle of our own hard days) to others. So hard to do sometimes – but worth consciously cultivating that characteristic in myself – even if right now it doesn’t come naturally like it used to. Thank you for your Friday thoughts. Thank you for giving my family so many new family favorite recipes (Hawaiian chicken and coconut rice are the most requested by all.).
FYI: Ive used your recipes to teach people (including my 10-year old daughter) to up their cooking/baking game during this last year and a half. It’s been a blessing to distract our minds, and use our hands and hearts to develop skills – so in our small ways we could serve and help ourselves and others (especially for my kids when there was so many circumstances on the news and around them in the world during COVID they had no control over affecting)
Grateful for you!
Love your guts, Mel. Love how real your posts are. The story about Maria brought me to tears, how amazing that you were able to open up a whole new world for her!
Mel, let me make your dream planner. I do it for several others. Everything you want can be done. I love you, miss you and we need to plan that girls trip to North Carolina!!
I can TOTALLY relate to the Mr. Koala meme! I just don’t usually admit it. And I’m so happy about Maria’s story! Wow, she is really inspiring! Maybe I should look into those piano lessons after all……
Ghosted by a therapist?! That is terrible! Find a good one and it will be one of the best hard things you do for yourself. Sending a big hug to make it through the final months of a trying year.
I remember reading about some of the very hard things you’ve gone through this year and the fact that you took the time to teach another woman how to read is really nice. I was raised with the philosophy that serving someone makes your own problems diminish. Smart woman going for the teach someone to read thing, what a blessing. I love the pigs and piglets. Thanks for sharing your fabulous recipes and family with the world. You are brave. ❤️
We will be out of town the weekend of Halloween and get back Sunday evening. We don’t live in Utah anymore, so I think there will be lots of people trick-or-treating when we get back but i told my girls we won’t be doing that since it’s Sunday. Anyway, I’m actually very relieved because trick-or-treating is my least favorite part of the holiday! Costumes can be fun and little parties with limited candy, but TorT is too much.
Thank you for sharing these wonderful parts of your life with us!
Ok, have to say that you CAN tell a lot about someone who wears crocs in public. But that may have been before it became so trendy a couple years ago for teens to wear them with socks! Argghhh!! Haha. But I have a pair I wear when I’m gardening and they are just right for that. To each his own I say and now I know better: who cares what other people wear anyhow! 😉
My daughters fav animal is a pig and she is wiggling in delight at those sweet babes!!
Also. The health issues are very real and sometimes the hardest for me when I have some mental setbacks is when they happen for seemingly no reason. No large event or bad thing I just fall into a slump. I am so grateful that this is becoming more normalized now! It’s ok to not be ok! So many great resources to help and lift. And Maria is truly inspirational! So proud of her for asking for help. I want to be humble and strong like her.
Thanks Mel! Your food and blog is one of my favorite things.
Piglets and Maria
Halloween (I do Fall)
Crocs (Each to their own- I wear Chuck Taylor)
Mental HelpLife is hard so sometimes we need a helping hand..
I’ve had Mohs Surgery twice- the price I pay for no sunscreen in my teens.
Thank you for being a bright light to others.
Love your Friday thoughts, it’s just like sitting down with a friend for a few minutes. Thank you for sharing the highlights, but also for opening up to all of us that may be having a difficult time. No one can help if you don’t let them in. Have a great weekend.
I just love what you share on these Friday posts. I cried reading Maria’s story. What an inspiration she is! What an inspiration you are, too, for reminding us that we can serve others. I love reading and it is one huge component in keeping me mentally healthy! I’m so happy Maria has that outlet now too.
I have croc flip flops and they are so comfortable.
Halloween is fine. We decorate and trick or treat. All of the other stuff stresses me out needlessly. I like that you have your kids create their own costumes. I pulled out our dress up box last week and told my youngest daughter to get creative, you made me feel better about that choice.
My second oldest just turned 16 too!
Thank you for being so transparent about mental health. I have my own struggles too. I have realized it is just going to be something that I have to contend with. Like with physical health. I exercise, try to eat healthy and get regular check ups on a routine basis so I need to do daily things to keep me mentally healthy too. I have found exercise and healthy eating actually help mental health too and journaling, therapy, and medication too. You got this.
Thank you for sharing your Friday thoughts! I just LOVED your story about Maria! As my youngest child just started preschool, I’m starting to think about what I want to do when I grow up and how I want to invest my time. I have zero desire to return to the working world, but I have strongly considered doing something in literacy because once someone can read, their whole world opens up! What a gift you have given her! Even though I know you give her the credit, she couldn’t have done it without you – and the friendship is just the most beautiful cherry on top!
I’m so so sorry for the mental health struggles. I have become acquainted with the agony of that struggle through one of my children this year and it is so grueling. I’m cheering you on.
No crocs for me, but we’re in the same camp for Halloween!
Love your guts. Can’t believe that Walk will be 16?! When did that happen?!?!
THOSE PIGS! Oh my gosh SO CUTE!!
I am so sorry to hear but this has been a rough year, and I feel so bad about your previous therapist. Thumbs down to that! Your next one will maybe just be exactly what you need. I applaud anyone who takes the time to do something so important for themselves – you are worth it! And I still like you even if we don’t share a love of Crocs. But I am totally a permanently exhausted pigeon.
I love you, Mel! I’m mainly here for the recipes because they are super scrumptious and relatively simple! However, over the past several years, I have started to read more of your blog and I just really appreciate the person you are and all you share! Long ago you posted about your skin cancer experience and then a few years later, I had almost the exact same procedure and drama. I remembered your post and it really helped me! Same for so many causes, etc, that you post. I use Kefir because of you! You are so relatable and real! Honestly, you’re a good friend, but you don’t know it- ha ha.
Anyway, I am so thankful you gave your time to help Maria! Such a blessing! It has been a very hard few years for many of us. I am just processing much of it myself and feel your struggles. Know that you have not failed, but have loved and touched so many. Take time to heal yourself- even hanging out with piglets some is therapeutic, ha ha.
I do love Halloween! It’s a time to dress up and use your imagination! Hope you can still like me:)
Just had to say a big thank you!!
Also, I forgot to say- Love your Guts, too!!
This reminds me of the movie Ramona and Beezus- it’s the best!!
As another mom with 5 kids (one’s a baby and only two are homeschooling), who also is involved in church and all the things, I’m so proud of you for seeing a need in another adult and making time to meet that need. It’s easy to make time for our kids’ and their friends’ needs, and the husband’s too, but it’s hard to take on helping another (seemingly) capable grown up. Great job, you!! The world is such a better place because you’re in it.
I’m making your ham and cheese crepes for supper tonight, just one more case in point.
A big thank you to your family for reaching out to Maria to teach her to read. She must be an amazing person and a strong woman to learn a new skill and you are an exceptional friend to teach her. I read 2 to 3 books a week and cannot imagine how difficult it would have been to raise a family and hold down a job without reading skills. I am overjoyed that Maria will now have the ability to lose herself in a good book.
I thank you, too for all of the great recipes you share with your readers. Many of my favorite recipes have come from friends (and blogs) that I would never have discovered if they hadn’t shared them with me. Recipes bring back memories of family dinners, holidays and friends.
I love these posts and all that you share. I am a Halloween hater too, and I’ll still like you even though you like crocs. As far as mental health goes, it has been a struggle and journey for me the past 3 years. I am so grateful for medication & therapy. Finding a therapist you click with is so incredibly daunting, and I’ve had my fair share of not so great therapy experience through the years. But it can be super helpful when you find the right one. Personally, I think anyone can benefit from therapy. I also know that when my mental health was at it’s lowest, the Lord led me to get help so that I would already be on medication and have a therapist in place when I went through some extremely difficult things in my family just a few months later. I don’t know that I would have survived otherwise. Good luck to you in finding the right therapist, and way to go for being proactive about getting the help you need.
Happy Friday to you Mel, your pigs have been such a fun distraction for me! I love them! How wonderful to help someone learn to read. I’m sure it’s opening whole new worlds for her. You are both strong women!
With regard to Halloween I’m in the hater group. It’s been a holiday I could do without! I’ve always been that way- even when my kids were little.
I got to see my son this week when he came for a visit after covid kept him away. It’s been almost 2 yrs and now I feel like I can breathe again. I’m a happy mom!
Happy Friday Mel! Thanks for your thoughts! Always love to hear what is going on with you. Loved hearing about the piglets and Maria. Fun and inspiration in one post!! Halloween: I like “fun” Halloween, hate “scary” Halloween! I cannot celebrate gore, death, creepy, evil, etc. But the fun pumpkin, ghost, silly witches, etc decorations are enjoyable.
I have never owned Crocs, that kind of shoe just doesn’t fit my foot. But I have no problem with people who wear them!
Happy birthday to your son! It is amazing how they change and how we can love that they are 16 but wish we could still hug that 8 year old!!!
Mel, I love you and your blog! Because of you I ran a half marathon and have kept on running ever since! Your recipes are all winners in my family!
Love your high top sneakers in the post. I would love a source if you have one!
Happy Fall!
Hi Mel! I love your blog, and I’ve made a ton of your recipes. Im only twelve, but I love baking and this is my favorite place to get new recipes. I love anything chocolate, but mostly dark chocolate.
Oh man, I can absolutely relate to “painfully playing my way through the hymns on the organ”. I have to do it this Sunday, just as a sub this time, but I’ve done it as my calling too. I’ve gotten better at not making faces every time I make a mistake. We are all works in progress. Very slow progress. 🙂
Mel I just love you! I reached out to my therapist a couple months ago and she said she wasn’t doing therapy anymore. I think it’s pretty common. I had another therapist in a support group for postpartum depression who was either fired or just up and moved and nobody knows where she went so we can’t have our support group anymore. But the other day my friend recommended doing therapy on a place online called Better Help and she said it’s been really good for her. It matches you to a therapist and you can do online chats, texts, etc. I’ll have to check it out. But I’m looking at a therapist who is close to my house too. Long story short, I’m all about the therapy. ♀️ It’s been so good for me. And anxiety medicine is pretty much my elixir of life. I really can’t live a healthy life without it. The last few years have been horrid for everyone, and you’ve had it especially hard! We all deserve some mental and physical TLC. Let’s normalize it. Love you, lady!
Wait, I thought there was going to be somewhere we could help Maria? Send her books? Help in some other way? I hope so! Thank you so much for sharing such a feel good story!!
There are probably programs in your own town for the many people like Maria. Try your local library. Ask your priest or rabbi. There are so many people out there that we are not even aware of.
I too was moved by the compassion shown by Mels husband to share the books with Maria and then for Maria being willing to accept Mel’s (gift of service). It made me reflect back to when I worked at a library and a 70+ year old man came in for reading lessons. I was a young adult at the time and was both in awe and saddened that he was there weekly. It was a joyous day when he graduated from the help. As I read Maria’s story and thought back to this gentleman’s desire to learn to read, I too became curious as to what we can do as a society to help remove the stigma and judgments and get in to help teach others to read. I will check with my library but if others have any other suggestions (besides just word of mouth) I would love to hear them.
Like another commenter said, I believe we all need to
Give more grace; to ourselves and all others.
Mel, you are a genuine, real, amazing human. I pray for you to find what you need to feel peace and joy along the journey.
Loved the story about Maria. What a sweet experience for you both. I have used that book to teach all my kids to read as well. It is the BEST! Love how systematic it is. Hoping you find a more worthy therapist. I often find it easy to push aside the idea of getting help because of the extra time and cost that it entails, and have to remind myself that with the right person the benefit to be gained is priceless. Life is hard. ❤️
I don’t have anything to comment on about the specific things you asked but just wanted to say we need more Mels in this world. Thanks for being such an inspiration and for sharing your light to others even in the dark days. I don’t know specifically what you are going through but I just want to let you know that you are loved. You’ve lifted me on many many occasions and I don’t even know you personally. It takes an amazing person to reach out across the internet and be personable enough to touch individuals. Thank you for being you.
<3
Thanks for this, Mel! Love your cute piglets and your Crocs. Can’t believe your boy is that old!! (Yes, I’m a long time reader). Love Halloween – I can’t help it. And that section about Maria….aww…..you are changing the world by helping her learn to read. Your blog is simply the best. And I’m no expert on mental health, but I sure love listening to Jody Moore’s podcast “Better Than Happy.” It’s helped me sort out a problem or thirty. She’s great! Her “Be Bold” program is also amazing and I highly recommend. Love your guts – thanks for all you do.
I love Halloween and I think it’s because it’s for everyone. (Mostly kids, of course.) I’m single and Thanksgiving and Christmas can make me feel very lonely because they’re so family-focused. I still love those holidays too but Halloween feels more inclusive to anyone who wants to celebrate it. It doesn’t make anyone feel lonely! It’s just fun and a nice kick-off to the holiday season! 🙂
As another single person, I love this idea. I’ve never thought of Halloween that way before but it’s true that you can celebrate without kids, if that’s your thing. Personally, I like to watch old, non-scary Vincent Price movies and eat candy. 🙂 I hope you have a great holiday!
This is why you’re the only food blog I continue following. You are REAL, thank you!!!
You are simply the best. Thank you for being real. Several years ago, my husband and I were going some really heavy times, and I didn’t feel like we could be open with very many people about what we were going through. What would the world be like if we were all transparent about the things we are struggling with? I think we would be much more apt to treat each other with love. I appreciate your openness about your struggles with mental health stuff and your beautiful story about working with Maria. Right before the pandemic hit I started working with a mental health professional and it has made the world of difference. I am in a better place now than I ever have been before. Keep looking! There are better days ahead.
Those pigs are so darn cute (the babies and the adults), I made my husband lay in bed one morning and look at them with me a week ago. Thanks for sharing.
Love that you helped Maria learn to read. Sounds like you got as much out of it as she did. So happy for both of you.
I don’t really hate Halloween, but I don’t understand why adults love it so much. I mean when you’re a kid….candy, right? but now? I don’t get it.
Try to ignore the haters, easier said than done, I know, but really if you give them any time at all they win and they don’t deserve the victory.
Thanks for your efforts on this blog, I’ve learned so much from you and know that your recipes won’t fail me, well, unless I screw it up…. 😉
Thank you for opening up and being so honest with everyone. It has been SO HARD. My goodness.
Bit please know that my whole family is thankful for YOU.
We are still taking covid very seriously around here and even though my husband and I are vaccinated, I still live in fear of somehow going out in public and bringing home this virus and infecting my children. We wear masks constantly and greatly limit our outside activities. I just could never live with myself if one of my children caught it and I knew it was simply because I stopped being vigilant.
Anyyyyyyyhow…..
That means we haven’t stepped foot in a restaurant and over 2 years. And since we hate takeout food because it never tastes as good as when it’s delivered piping hot to the table….
That means I have cooked SO MANY DARN MEALS IT’S NOT EVEN FUNNY.
My husband does not cook. Bless his soul, but he does not cook.
So that has rested so much responsibility on my shoulders and that’s where you come in.
I have said it before, but I have tried a gazillion of your recipes on your site and have loved pretty much almost every single one of them. And my family has loved almost every single one of them.
And in a year where I have cooked more than I have everrrrrrrrr cooked in my life, trying new recipes and knowing that the odds are it’s going to turn out great because I got it from YOUR website is such a huge relief.
No one likes wasting their time. No one likes wasting ingredients… Especially in a world right now when both money and time are very tight
So THANK YOU, MEL.
I hope you find some help with a therapist, (and shame on your other therapist for ghosting you, how absolutely horrendous!) Because a good therapist can make such an incredible difference in your life.
You are such a good person. A truly loving soul. A wonderful mother. I know I don’t really know you, but I feel like I know you.
And just know that a little family of four, far away in Buffalo New York, greatly appreciates you!
I could take or leave Halloween. I do like fall, but I HATE pumpkin flavors, so I am always glad when this season is over and all my favorite food bloggers stop posting pumpkin recipes. 😉
Your piglets are just precious and I love watching them on Instagram.
I don’t own any Crocs. Forgive me, but I think they are ugly. No hate, though, to anyone who wear them in public. You do you.
I am so glad you will be trying to look for another Therapist. Finding a Therapist that fits you and your personality can be challenging and sometimes you have to try more than one to find the right fit, but don’t give up.
Thank you for making this little part of the internet a happy place to visit!
I love the Crocs sandals that I have. They are not like the Crocs most people wear. Never cared for them.
No, I do not like Halloween at all.
What a sweet story about Maria and you helping her to learn to read. How precious!
Mel, I love your story about Maria. A good picture book about an adult learning to read is “The Oldest Student: How Mary Walker Learned to Read” by Rita Hubbard.
Thanks for your posts!
I was ghosted by a therapist, too. My new therapist said it happens a lot and many times it has nothing to do with the client. Three cheers for good therapy!
Glad you’re enjoying Crash Landing on You. You should watch Hometown Cha-Cha-Cha after. Thank me later. 😉
I could take or leave Halloween. My favorite is Thanksgiving!
Hi Mel and Happy Friday! (made even happier after reading my fav Friday thoughts posts!)
3 comments:
1 – The koala post – yesssssss
2 – I HATE HALLOWEEN
3 – 1 good thing about 2021 is that I took a serious look at my mental health and decided that it is just as important (maybe even more) as my physical health – I am proud of myself for recognizing this and (finally) doing something about it
I’ve been reading your blog since it was just me and a couple of others plus some of your family members. I can’t believe how quickly time has passed. You have teenagers! Your recipes have been blessings and you have helped so many people feed their families! I can’t thank you enough for sharing and caring. Know that you are appreciated and loved by many, many people you will never meet. That’s an amazing accomplishment in this world! Wishing you and your family all the best.
I struggled with planners for years. I have tried many different kinds. Finally, I researched planners for people with ADHD and “built” my own planner on an excel spreadsheet. It’s basically a daily/weekly birds-eye view of what I need to accomplish and it has helped me tremendously. The downfall (if you can call it that, is that is covers my work day only. I can’t muddle work and personal life stuff. So, I’ve got one for work and one for personal. Two sheets per day.
Love you, Mel! Thank you for sharing your fabulous recipes, the farm, the piglets and your Friday Thoughts. Loved the story of Maria reading – oh my word that is the best.
Mental health – this has been a rough year for me as well. Our Relief Society lesson brought the question “what have we gained from living during these times in the past year? Everyone was answering a closer relationship with Heavenly Father and the Savior, better Come Follow Me study, closer family, etc. To myself I acknowledged that I had gained depression, anxiety, OCD, 30 pounds and was feeling like a spiritual slug. Combination of stuff – finding out my son has serious drug addictions, work stress (healthcare) of a whole new computer system to learn and teach others, and then the regular life stuff. The chaos that drug addicts bring to a home are unimaginable. Had my own little mini breakdown and then finding out that going to therapy caused me more stress because I felt like the therapist was just one more person that I was letting down! I’m doing better now, have a wonder PA that is following me closly, got some Prozac and some anxiety meds (to take as needed) and I’m learning to recognize what emotions and feelings are actually my own anxieties surfacing.
Thank you for sharing your own ups and downs. Love to you and the family and those piglets!
I love your Friday thoughts. Your transparency is so refreshing. I wish more people were that way. Sometimes I want to just post pictures of a messy kitchen or sewing room that is trashed or a dinner that is “ugly” because this is real life. The story of Maria is lovely. We need more of that today. I also love watching the pigs. I feel like all I want social media to be is food, sewing inspo, funny memes and animal videos. Everything else can just go away!
I just love your guts. Beginning of 2021 has been fine, not horrible, not great. The next 2 months are making me want to hide in a corner and eat my weight in dark chocolate. It’ll be fine, but I’m overwhelmed. Also, my daughter made your pumpkin sourdough muffins the same day, and I’m loving them as a quick snack! I finally braved sourdough, and I’m surviving because of your lazy guide, and the links to pizza and waffles. I tried a bread that my friend gave me the recipe and I wanted to rip my hair out, it was so involved! You’re the best, hope you find the help you need to make it through the rest of the year!
Mel, when you mentioned that the pigs took forever to “get the job done” I laughed a little, because my first thought was that the actual deed, ahem, took forever. I used to do lab testing for a pig breeding company, and at some point I learned that male pigs can ejaculate up to half a liter of semen. So it kind of does take forever! The stuff that takes up space in our brains sometimes…..
And what about people who don’t wear crocs in public, but they do wear their leather house slippers. Asking for a friend. 🙂
Your post made me laugh and cry! First, SUPER Halloween fan and I won’t apologize. Lol. AND, I used to have 14 pairs of Crocs ( yes, you read that correctly) in all colors and I loved them. I’m down to one pair left after my cats nibbled on most of them. I tend to wear the Crocs Walu loafer now and have four pairs of those. Anyway, hang in there and always known that you are appreciated!
Please keep posting piglets! They make me smile on good and bad days!
We did a fire pit and lots of food when my now 21 yo turned 16.
Thank you for keeping it real on here. Life is messy.
Try again with another therapist. You can do it. Even if the therapist doesn’t ghost you, it still takes several tries to find a good fitting therapist. Trust me, I’ve been seeing therapists for 25 years.
Love your thoughts! What a sweet story about Maria! You are amazing! I am sorry you were ghosted by a therapist. That is not ok. I am a counseling student at NNU and if you need help finding a therapist I would be happy to get some recommendations.
Mel! Your Friday thoughts are my favorite (which says a lot because I visit your website almost every day for your life-changing recipes)! I’m always touched by your authenticity and goodness that you so freely share. The story about Maria made me cry and made me want to do more to reach out and help those around me. You truly always inspire me. I’m so sorry for your struggles. Thank you for being open and honest about them. ❤️ Wish I could reach through the phone to give you a giant hug. Thanks for making the world a better place!!
2020 has NOTHING on 2021. I’m so grateful for your honesty and resilience. You keep showing up with recipes and Friday Thoughts and barnyard antics. I’m grateful we are (one-sided) besties. Thanks for being there in my darkest times!
Oh, my favorite posts! The piglets are so cute. I have strong therapy opinions. When you have mental stuff that needs unpacking (and honestly, we all find ourselves there at some point) you need the best, smartest therapist you can find. If the one you try isn’t a good fit, try someone else. A good, smart therapist is worth their weight in gold, but a bad therapist (and there are many!) isn’t worth a second appointment. Someone well trained and smart will help you sort what needs sorting and get you out of their office and back in the middle of your own life. A bad therapist will charge you to watch you swirl in the same confusion you had when you came in. Expensive and unhelpful. Trust your gut and hope you find someone who can help you leave some baggage behind. Have a great day,
You are an inspiration to me, Mel, for your dedication to faith, family and friends; your commitment to living a well-rounded life; and your willingness to admit that life can be hard. Your piglets are adorable, your kids have grown so much (when did that happen?), and your recipes are always a hit with my family. I believe it’s ok to ask for help, admit we’re not perfect, and pull back the social media facade that makes everything seem rosy. You’re doing a great job! Also, no crocs for me, and I’m not judging! 🙂
I love your Friday thoughts posts so much! I don’t comment much, but I’ve been following you & using your recipes for more than a decade now and feel like we are friends even though you don’t know me. We joke around here that you’re my BFF but you just don’t know it yet..
The older I get the more I realize that no matter how perfect someone’s life seems every single one of us has some kind of difficulty and heartache we are dealing with. Thanks for sharing your heart with us. I hope you easily find a therapist that’s a good fit.
That’s not always easy.
I’m with you on Halloween, it’s not my favorite holiday.
What a beautiful experience you had with Maria! I teach English to refugees in my area and it is the best thing when they succeed and we can celebrate their progress together. Getting to know them and associate with them has definitely made my life better.
Thanks again for sharing your life with us including some of the hard stuff. You’re seriously my favorite. Have a fantastic day!
Oh my gosh, Mel, I swear if we knew each other in real life, I feel like we would be best friends! I love you so much! I am also a Halloween hater! I can’t help if, I’ve tried but I just can’t get excited about the holiday. I also play the organ at church and your comment about fumbling through the hymns made me laugh! My 12 year old daughter is obsessed with pigs (I really don’t know why) and I have to show her some of your pig content on Instagram. I know she will love it! Coincidentally, a friend of mine has pigs and they just had a litter last week too and we went to see them. They were so cute, but the mom wouldn’t nurse and so they were having to bottle feed them. I couldn’t believe how much little piglets are like little puppies, they are very active and fast! Last thing, I appreciate you being open about your mental health. I have struggled with my own mental health for the last several year and I have found so much strength in sharing my struggles with friends who have experienced similar things. I don’t try to hide it from my kids or anyone really because I think it’s important for people to know that other people are struggling. It’s ok not to be ok. Truly. Love you so much Mel even though I don’t know you in real life. I’ve followed you from the beginning and my kids know that you’re one of my besties even though we’ve never actually met. Hope that’s not creepy! Have a wonderful day!
Mel, I love your Friday thoughts and most especially your recounting of your friend Maria. I loved your sharing of her quiet determination and strength of character. What a gift you have given her through opening up the world of reading. You are certainly an angel among us! Thank you, Bev
Oh my gosh. Just the post I needed to read! I’ve never commented before, but I use (and my family enjoys) plenty of your delicious recipes. Thank you for being so honest! It’s hard to talk about parenting or your kids, because although we’re a part of the story, sometimes it’s not our story to tell and they deserve their privacy. I completely identify with your first meme! I’ve said to my husband, more than once, what if you give it all you’ve got and it still doesn’t work out? That’s how I feel with regard to parenting at times. I so enjoyed my kids when they were little but the teen years and older have been the difficult ones for me.
Additionally, I live in a materialistic city in So CA where it’s all about buy, have and compare, which makes it difficult to be vulnerable. Oh, I’m going to borrow that phrase which sums it up so beautifully ” society seems to prize and reward unsustainable and misleading perfection.” Well said! Just want you to know that I appreciate your authenticity! It encourages me and gives me hope that “if you can do it, so can I.” More than that, I feel like I’m not alone. You mentioned church and Jesus is who is holding me up most of the time! Thanks again–you’re the best!!!!
HOW ARE YOUR KIDS GETTING SO OLD!?
I don’t do Crocs but I live in Chacos and have multiple pair. The day it gets too cold to wear them is a sad, sad day around here. (which coincidently was this week because Nampa is stupid with it’s weather lately!)
Maria. What an amazing human. (both of you!) You made me cry. Rude.
As a former history teacher, as long as the boys aren’t reading here during that class, I’m cool with it. 🙂
Long-live Halloween. I used to be a hater but now with littles (6 & 7), we are all about spooky and pumpkins and bats and the such.
You’re awesome. I’m glad you’ve keep this space going for over a decade. Been with you since the beginning.
You’re recipes are always amazing, but I have to say I always love these Friday thoughts the most. Thanks for your candid thoughts, just what I needed this Friday morning.
On my 16th birthday, my dad had arranged for someone important in my life to bring me a rose and a note on the hour, every hour for 16 hours. Some of them were at school, which was a little embarrassing :-). Some of the people were young women’s leaders, family friends, or aunts and uncles. At the time I thought it was a little embarrassing, but secretly loved it. It’s been 20 years and it’s still touching to me. Of course, boys might not like getting 16 roses – haha!
Touching to me to hear about this, Laura!
How beautiful, loving, and lasting <3
What a gift from your dad- including the slight embarrassment!
I loved hearing about, Maria! This is seriously what life is all about. I helped teach some women to read as a missionary in the DR, and I feel it’s one of the most rewarding experiences I’ve ever had.
It’s obvious you have a big heart, Mel and we love you for that.
I wish I could give you a hug. Thanks for the light and love you bring to this space. I struggle, too. <3 You are loved.
Thank you for being real and open. Your posts are really the only ones I look forward to reading because it doesn’t feel like you are posting just to be seen and stay popular like so many others. You are never fake and I appreciate that. Reading your Friday thoughts posts feels like catching up with a friend than reading a blog (a friend I’ve never met, but still ☺️). Keep being you in whatever shape or form that takes. Wishing you all the best as you begin your therapy.
Your story about Maria was what I needed today. Kudos to the three of you – Brian for creating the type of workplace where Maria felt comfortable coming to him and asking him for help (that’s really, really huge today), Maria for having the courage to ask and determination to learn, and you for selflessly giving yourself and your time to improve someone else’s life.
And, the piglets have saved my sanity this month.
Love your Friday thoughts! Maria is an inspiration, and made me think of a lady in my friend’s church congregation. She is in her 70’s and decided to learn to play piano. Her first “recital” was to play for the women’s group — a very simple song but she proudly rocked it. Kudos to Maria for her courage and determination!
And kudos to you for your transparency and courage to acknowledge that we all need help sometimes. The online veneer of “my life and my family are so perfect” can be discouraging, and I love your guts because you are real. Wishing you the very best.
I went to a drive-through movie theater with friends for my 16th birthday. It was a novelty because we had to drive an hour and a half to go to one. It is kind of a novelty if you have one in your area. Just an idea. Maybe they could go to the new James Bond movie at a drive-through theater. Also laser tag with friends It’s something my husband loves even though he is over 30.My aunt got my cousin a toy car of his favorite model of vehicle. It was a joke that she was getting him a car ha ha. That could be fun if you know that he likes a specific type of car
Oh Maria! I LOVE THIS STORY!!! Reading about this experience you have shared is so inspirational. Thank you for sharing! Pig photos and video stories have kept me afloat on many a hard day from the last couple weeks. Thanks for your contributions all around!
Love your guts, Mel.
Maria’s story made my day and beyond. Feeling humble, grateful, and renewed- thanks to you both for connecting us with boundless love, truth, commitment. Keeping this close to return to for reflection.
Talking about caring for your mental health reality is brave and helps more people than we can know- thanks. Hope you can laugh someday about the ghosting therapist- so ridiculously bad, but therapists are just people too, hoo boy. Hoping you find a good fit and and support soon. When you find that it can be exceptionally healing <3
And, with you on Halloween…I'm happy for others who love it, but l'm earning that it is just fine that I really don't. Instead I enjoy all the pumpkins, fall decorations, and festive treats
My 7yo son has anxiety and we’ve watched the piglet highlights on your faux farm Instagram together to calm him down. It’s easy to feel happy watching little piglet tail wiggles. Piglet therapy works even from afar!
I really like rad and happy undated planners and teachers planner. I am not a teacher but for a mother of five it works really well too,
Thank you for your open honesty and relatable content.
I always think you don’t really need to hear from me with so many comments, but so many of your thoughts resonated today! Especially the memes, and the struggle with a hard year. Also, I love what you are doing for Maria! My mom teaches English to refugees and worked as an adult ESL teacher for years. I would love to get involved, but Wyoming doesn’t have a refugee program. So sad. 🙁
One last thought on Halloween. I used to hate it, but a friend changed my mind. She was a dentist and said it was her favorite holiday. When I asked why, she said because of the low expectations. Buy a bag of candy, pull out the dress ups (or go through your closet), and you’re done. Decorate or don’t. But there are no big family and friend expectations, no guilt, just eat candy and be happy. 🙂
These Friday posts are some of my favorites because they are REAL. Thank you so much for it all, but especially for baring your soul and sharing your piglets, and your Maria!! I pray that she will continue to find success and loving people in her life to help her along. She is such a great example, thanks so much for sharing her story with all of us, such an inspiration.
I am wiping away the tears as I type this. Yay for Maria (and you)! Have you ever read the children’s book by Jerry Spinelli called Maniac MaGee? He teaches the old baseball groundskeeper to read and it is the sweetest chapter. Maria reading her first words reminded me of this book!
I’ve been around almost from the very beginning. I can’t believe he’s almost 16!
My heart broke hearing that you were ghosted by a therapist. Mine is my lifeline right now. Praying you find the courage and that you are blessed with an incredible therapist!
Also, Mel’s Faux Farm stories are my favorite!! ❤️
When I grow up I want to be more like you Mel! Loved!!
I don’t know why I always forget that I’ll be sobbing over my breakfast when I read these.
Maria is amazing. I truly admire her. It was also a small reminder to me that it’s ok for me to focus on my little piece of this life and I don’t need world recognition to make an impact with my people in my home.
Crocs… totally not above them and wearing them in public. Maybe I need a pair… I’ve really liked Chaco’s Chillio slides. They’re much equivalent to crocs in my mind.
Thanks for being a safe space in the web. I hope you’re able to find a therapist who is the perfect fit for you.
How did you come to decide you were in need of a therapist? I sometimes wonder if it would be a good idea for me to find one…. But it’s not like I have major life events that are causing me trauma. So I guess I just wonder how do you know you need that extra bolster?
❤️❤️
I’m not Mel but hope I can share a few ideas including most humans have varied little t trauma(s) and can benefit from therapy…even just a few sessions. @revacooklcsw has a highlight bubble on Instagram about finding/choosing a therapist. @aundikolber has an amazing book, Try Softer which can be an intro to some therapy practices. And many employers offer an EAP program which includes a few free sessions with a list of providers. Best wishes!
Hey Katrina, this is actually a really good question. I don’t have an official answer – I can only speak for myself…but while I haven’t had any huge major traumas in my life, I reached a point where the things that were besetting me were taking over the happiness I felt in normal situations with my family and other situations. And I wasn’t able to get past the anxiety like I used to. So for me, it was just realizing that I would appreciate some help learning how to get through situations that are difficult bc I wasn’t able to just power through like I used to. Don’t know if that makes sense, but that’s just my experience.
I appreciate you discussing mental health. It’s an issue that touches most of us and is not talked about enough. My son struggles with depression and his therapist recommended we consult with a psychiatrist. My son thought that meant he was “psycho”. It broke my heart. The brain is one of many organs in the body that needs care.
Thank you Mel! Thank you for your thoughts (which are absolutely some of my favorite posts) and honesty. I love that you taught Maria to read. Thank you for believing in her. You made my day and probably my week for sure. Though I admit, I’m firmly in the Halloween fan club
Although I love the recipes, and rely on so many of them time after time after time it is these Friday thoughts posts that are my very favourite. The love for your family, your current interests and thoughts, projects and admissions of vulnerability strike a chord with me every single time. I appreciate the time abd effort it must take to write one of these posts. Know that they are read and reread and cherished. And P.S. your son looks exactly like your husband!!
I was slow and stubborn to admit that I was not okay as well. But I am so glad that I finally did and sought help. It has made a world of difference for me. I hope you find the same. Thank you for sharing your recipes, your farm stories, and your life stories with us! You make the world a brighter place!
Thank you, CG
I love your deep thoughts and your belly-scratching pig thoughts, too. Thanks for sharing your real!
Mel, I’m so proud of you for getting help. I’ve been to a counselor for help years ago and it’s so helpful. Journaling your thoughts are so helpful. And most important, daily intimacy with Jesus, giving Him our burdens, and holding on tightly to the grace filled lover of our souls will get us through!! Love you and love your blog. We are all imperfectly perfect saved by Grace.
I love Crocs and I can’t wear them. I found out in two painful falls that stuff on the ground can get stuck in those lovely treads and help you trip. Your knitting trick seems a very useful excuse for buying new Crocs and just wearing them indoors. I will do anything for knitting fun.
You are my favorite person to read on the whole internet. That is all.
Ditto!
1,000% agree. I find reading the church magazines a daunting task, but I find my very soul healed in just a few paragraphs by Mel. What a tender mercy to have found this blog.
I love these posts! thank you for sharing your life with us! I’m particularly moved by your story about your new friend Maria. I hope she knows about this post and can read it herself!! Way to go Maria!!
Also I want to read the Maria story to my kids but they’ll have to halfway through bc I’ll be bawling
I cried reading about Maria! She sounds amazing. I care for a little boy that can’t go to school because of various health challenges and I’m trying to teach him to read. It’s hard! Hard to teach and hard to learn. He read his first sentence yesterday though and I was so proud- I let out a big squeal and it startled him and he started crying. Oops!
Thank YOU for being here! We all love your guts around here too!
Funny, I’m jumping on the therapy train too (I call it counseling ha). Some stuff has been sitting with me since I was 12. Time to move forward. I want pigs, the end.
Love you so much, Mel!!!!!
I love this whole post, especially your transparency about mental health. I too have been struggling a lot, and I finally started seeing a therapist in July (plus some medication), and it has been soooo helpful! That stinks you were ghosted by your first therapist, but I hope you find another that will work for you. Your site is a high point in my life – most of the recipes we cook at our house come from here, and I love that you have five kids, so I know that it has been family approved so hopefully my kids will eat it too!
I love that Maria was humble enough to ask for help to learn how to read and that you were able to help her. Life changing for both of you!
Yeah for your uplifting and heart warming thoughts. Good luck with your brood of piglets—they look adorable. I am a paper calendar person and have been using Polestart Family Calendar for 25 years. They have become like journals. The company is in British Columbia, Canada. You have to choose the form that works best for you.
Those monster treats look yummy. Thank you for sharing photos of your family—everyone looks awesome. You are an amazing lady, Mel !