Let’s Talk: When There’s No Time {or Desire} To Make Dinner
We’ve all been there- nights when we don’t have time or desire to make dinner. This post gets you through those nights!
When I’m talking to someone and they say something like: “I’m so jealous that you love to cook, it’s not fair” or “at least you like to make dinner – it’s the worst” or “can you teach me how to look forward to dinnertime?”
I always have a hard time not falling on the ground and laughing my head off. Or bursting into tears. Or laying on the nearest couch to share all my deep, dark feelings about dinnertime.
The truth is: I love to cook. I do. And I dream about food. I really do.
But thinking of (and actually executing) dinner every single night for the rest of forever kind of makes me want to crawl in a hole somewhere and never emerge.
Dinnertime is hard.
Every family situation is different, but in our house with five kids going a lot of different directions, the general chaos of after-school homework and activities and piano practice/lessons (hold me), and in general, just a busy life with a few still-young kids that like to cling to my legs between the hours of 4 and 6, dinnertime is not always my most favorite time of the day.
I’ve talked a lot about how I work hard to plan a menu. It keeps me as sane as possible (note: I’m not saying it keeps me completely sane, mind you) and definitely helps to get dinner on the table many nights.
If I’ve bought the ingredients and planned my day to get dinner prepped, ready, and made, chances are it’s going to happen more often than not.
But there are always those nights. You know the ones (pleeeeease tell me you know the ones) where even with the best laid plans, dinner is a major struggle. Sometimes I’m simply not in the mood for what I put on the menu plan two weeks before.
Other times, it’s me forgetting about a meeting or an extra soccer practice or getting involved in a project or burying into the kids’ homework with them and forgetting that hungry mouths need something to eat for dinner (including mine).
I mean, the list goes on.
But the point of this post isn’t to continue complaining about how dinnertime is hard (although I do love to complain about it, as you can see); instead I want to share some of my strategies for what happens when the official dinner plans don’t, because at the end of the day, I want something yummy to eat even if it isn’t gourmet or on the official menu plan.
There are a certain number of storebought/homemade foods I keep stocked because I know I have a fallback for hectic dinner nights. Here are a few of my go-to’s and how I use them for a semi-homemade dinner fix (as a quick note, I have more stores available to me now that we don’t live in the remote wilds of Northern Minnesota, but even when we’ve lived in really, really small towns, I would stock up on all of these things – and more – when I would do my large grocery store trips in the big city and keep everything in the freezer):
Aidell’s Chicken Sausages: I’m not affiliated with this company/product at all but man, we love these (I get mine at Costco). I keep the Pineapple & Bacon Chicken Sausages in the fridge/freezer constantly. I use them in real, live recipes of course, but many nights, we heat them up in a skillet and dip them in BBQ sauce for a quick dinner (served with fresh fruit/vegetables). Sometimes I roast them on a baking sheet with vegetables that need to be used up (broccoli, potatoes cut in small cubes, etc) and if you like really down-home foods, my Aunt Marilyn clued me into a great, fast dinner: throw chopped cabbage, thinly sliced potatoes, and some of these chicken sausages, sliced, into a large skillet with a little olive oil. Cook over medium heat for a few minutes letting the sausage brown a little, adding salt and pepper to taste (season well!). Pour in a bit of water, maybe 1/2 cup or so, cover the skillet and let it all steam until tender and flavorful, 10 or so minutes. We put a little shredded sharp cheddar cheese on top and it is muy delicioso (and so, so easy).
Bagels (Parmesan ones from Costco are our favorites): some nights it’s simply toasted bagels with cream cheese but bagels also make really great paninis* or hearty sandwiches and kind of takes an ordinary hurry-and-make-a-sandwich-for-dinner-night up a little notch.
Rustic crusty bread (or a storebought variety): speaking of paninis, I always have a loaf of the Rustic crusty bread, this Rosemary bread, and/or those soft Ciabatta-type rolls (again, I get them at Costco) in my freezer because I’ve learned that paninis might be the best thing to happen to scattered dinner plans. They can be customized according to your customers, which means I can keep it simple for the kids and still get a fabulous meal in my belly (my favorite panini – easy to keep everything on hand – is fig butter, green apple slices, swiss or Brie cheese, Dijon mustard and ham; heavenly, and it comes together in minutes)
Flatbread (from Costco or this homemade Greek pita flatbread): pizza, baby! Turn on the broiler, load up the flatbread (no need to even thaw if the flatbread has been in the freezer as long as the pieces can be separated) with desired toppings and broil for just a few minutes; besides classic pizza sauce/toppings, we also love to top this flatbread with scrambled eggs, ham and cheese (and broil) or a little olive oil, garlic powder and whatever cheese is in the fridge.
*We use our handy dandy panini press several times a week for paninis, grilled cheese, and sometimes french toast. I have the older Cuisinart model but it appears the newer, less expensive version is getting great reviews, too. Can’t recommend this appliance enough – I love it so very much.
I freeze a lot of food – often, I’ll make a double batch of something just so I can stick half in the freezer for later. I have a whole list of meals on my blog that are freezable, but here are the ones I specifically keep in my freezer at all times for quick dinners (there are a lot of freezer meals wonderful for baking from frozen – but a 2-hour bake time doesn’t help us on crazy nights where we may have forgotten to start it on time, am I right?):
Homemade Spaghetti Sauce: dinner is just a pot of boiling noodles away (the sauce pulled straight from the freezer can be defrosted and warmed in 10-15 minutes)
BBQ Pork: this makes great quesadillas or quick sandwiches
Freezer Beef and Bean Burritos or these Super Bean Burritos: easiest dinner ever
Meatballs: I make extra of the meatballs from this recipe and keep them in the freezer; quickly defrosted and heated through and they can be served alone with fresh vegetables/fruit, with steamed rice, or on bread (toasted or broiled with cheese or lots of different types of sauces: spaghetti, curry, etc.)
If you have a little more oomph in you and want to follow a recipe, here are a few of my fave recipes that need 20-minutes or less and use {mostly} pantry staples. And of course I have to give a quick shout-out (thanks to the comments who helped me remember!) that breakfast for dinner is a totally acceptable solution sometimes. Some of our favorite breakfasts-for-dinner are basic scrambled eggs + toast, waffles, pancakes (this make-ahead mix is awesome), and these rollup blender pancakes are always well-received.
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I look forward to dinner as much as anyone in this house. And because I love me a good meal, the thought of eating cold cereal for dinner makes me want to cry, but this wouldn’t be any sort of keepin’ it real, let’s talk post without a nod to the no-cook options. I try to utilize any of the above tips before resorting to this, but you know, sometimes a girl’s gotta do what a girl’s gotta do. One of our favorite fallbacks in this category is popcorn (still using and loving this microwave popper for all our homemade popcorn needs) and smoothies.
Is dinnertime ever a stress at your house?
Please share (your stresses AND your solutions!).
{As always, this post is unsponsored and the few affiliate links above are to products I’ve bought myself and loved from Amazon.}
is “fig and lemon jam” close enough to fig butter?? i havent seen it at my local grocery store but found this jam at walmart… what do you think?
I’d try it! Sounds yummy
I know this is an older post but I just have to tell you that I have made Aunt Marilyn’s cabbage, potato and sausage skillet at least once a month since you posted this. Our favorite sausage is the tomato basil chicken sausage from Trader Joe’s. I still read this post now and then for inspiration.
So happy to hear this, Stephanie!
I just came across this post and have to say, it just made my night! You seriously have helped me change my mother game and I am forever grateful! I show my gratitude in telling everyone in the world that will listen about you. But this post made me appreciate you even more! Thanks!
Thank you!!!
Mel don’t let your kids grow up! If you do and they are still at home (I have 3 who have recently moved back home for various reason with kids and/or spouses in tow. You will regret knowing how to cook. I love to cook but I hate making dinner, I swear no 2 people want the same thing and if I ask what they want ahead of time I get the same response from every single one of them “I don’t know” and of course what ever I made wasn’t what they wanted or I hear oh so and so won’t eat that can you make something else. I swear I am going to put up a menu board an put the days menu on it and start charging for off menu items (and it won’t come cheap) not one of them seems to know how to make anything that doesn’t come out of a can, box or freezer bag! I asked one to cut up vegetables that led to a trip to the ER for stitches and a complaint that my knives are dangerous!!! YA THINK! My husband (these are all his side of our blended family) doesn’t seem to see a problem. He has taken to helping with loading and unloading the dishwasher, because when he complained about how long the dishwasher was run every day I threw a dish rag at him and said you do them. then. Don’t get me wrong I love them all to death and would do anything for them. I guess I am just not used to people who would happily live on ground beef for weeks at a time, and wont eat vegetables except salad (Lettuce, tomatoes green onion that’s it) canned sweet peas and canned green beans and I cannot convince them that Baked beans and Pork and Beansare not considered Vegetables
I just had my second baby and have referenced this post so often in the past two months I almost have it memorized. My favorite tip is keeping pulled pork in the freezer because it can be used for lunch or dinner. It can go on a roll, or a tortilla, or a rice bowl. An easy meal I would add to the list is a roasted broccoli and pineapple rice bowl. I just start the rice cooker and toss frozen broccoli and pineapple on a cookie sheet to roast. Then mix it together with soy sauce and sriracha. A fried egg can add some protein and I keep all the ingredients on hand
That sounds amazing, Brianna!
What part of the grocery store has the fig butter?
I’ve found it at Trader Joes and on Amazon (there’s been a variation of fig jam at my regular grocery store, too, in the jam aisle, although it isn’t labeled “fig butter”)
What kind of flathead do you use from Costco? Is it a specific brand/from the bakery?
…flatbread*
I like to use the naan flatbread that’s in the refrigerated section (with the pesto).
I have a question regarding your panini press. Do you use it as much as a griddle? Is there overlap? I have wanted a panani press for awhile but didn’t know if I would find my griddle does many of the same things. I have a griddle that I use for quesadillas, grilled cheese, pancakes, flat breads etc. I use it all the time. Bottom line, do you have distinct uses for both griddle and panini press to justify having both. Thanks for your insights 🙂
Hi Megan, I use both – griddle and panini press. My panini press isn’t big enough to use for the other things I often make on the griddle but we make paninis so often that the panini press is worth it (it’s what we make grilled cheese on, too). Having said that, if you love your griddle, I’m pretty sure it does what a panini press would do, especially if you press the sandwiches down with a heavy lid or something like that while they cook.
I’m just a wee bit late reading this post, but “thank you!” Struggling through this first trimester of pregnancy with our third, and I have zilch desire to cook anything. Zero. Nada. So I was reading your blog today, hoping for some inspiration, and found this post…thank you so so much!!!
I’m finally getting around to comenting on this fantastic post. I also dread the daily dinner pressure, although a lot less since I found your blog! I had to tell you that I have made aunt Marilyn’s sausage potato skillet dinner at least two dozen times since this post and everyone loves it, even the picky one. Our favorite sausage is Trader Joes sun dried tomato and basil chicken sausage. Thanks for all you do!
Mel– I just have to say, I seriously love you! I frequent your blog and always end up with such a long list of recipes I want to try. (Everything I’ve made from here has been fantastic! Whenever I tell my husband I’m making a new recipe from Mel’s, he instantly trusts me that it will be wonderful :)) It’s one of those days… I’m a few days overdue on grocery shopping and the fridge is looking a little bare and dinnertime is fast approaching. I think I’m going to try the korean beef tonight! Thanks for all the ideas and suggestions and for being so real! I feel like you’re a long-time friend of mine and I just wanted to say thanks for all the time and effort you put in here! You’ve saved me more times than I can count with the dinnertime struggle!
My fallback meal is oatmeal. Seriously – it is quick, easy and I feel good about eating it. We also eat a fair amount of popcorn for dinner too. But my kids never seem to think that that was dinner and always ask for a real dinner an hour later.
I love trader Joe’s black bean taquitos for crazy nights. I always have at least five packages in my freezer. Paired with their southwest chicken poppers (freezer too!) it’s an easy and fast dinner!
I plan my meals one week at a time. I try to make one crockpot meal a week and throw in a few simple meals for the really hectic days. I try to prep anything I can in the morning. I have small children and my husband sometimes gets home late. Often I will feed my two youngest children a simplified version of dinner while I cook dinner for the rest of us. I too enjoy freezing items and keeping on hand certain ingredients that guarantee a tasty semi homemade dinner. My latest trick was setting out all the ingredients (non perishable) by my stove so that when I got home at night it was staring me in the face. Thanks again for keeping it real and helping me to put dinner on the table week after week!
This makes me feel so much better about some of the dinners we’ve had in the weeks since school started! These are some great ideas too, it’s always nice to have things to add to the quick & easy dinners list (and in a list outside my head, because I tend to forget them when I need them most!)
Thanks for all the quick ideas! Until soccer/football season is over we are living off of quick and easy. Love the muffin video with you and Cam! Now that I’m kinda in your neck of the woods, you are always welcome to come to Seattle! Seriously.
if you can see it coming, the crock-pot is your best friend. Even if you’ve just fallen off the wagon, lost your mojo, whatever. It’s a great way to get back in the groove. That or delegate dinner to the upper elementary kiddos and let the chips (doritos, more than likely) fall where they may:)
love this post. thanks for giving real life examples!!
I keep chicken patties in the freezer at all times. The ones from Foster Farms at Costco are actually pretty good! My kids don’t mind chicken patty sandwiches or sometimes I’ll slice up a few and throw them into a salad. Sometimes we’ll do malibu chicken from Sizzlers by adding ham and swiss cheese. Chicken patties are a lifesaver!
Quesadillas too of course. We buy the uncooked tortillas from Costco and we’ll do just plain cheese or I’ll throw in some pepperoni and left over pizza sauce and call them pizza quesadillas.
If I have a lot of little leftovers like veggies, leftover meat from another meal, tiny bit of cheese, extra produce from the co-op basket, etc, I’ll make a quiche to use it all up. Everyone loves a pie crust with eggs (I use the press-in pie crust from Betty Crocker, I mix it all up in the pie plate and press it into place. Love it!).
I keep a four-pack of bacon from Costco in the freezer at all times. It thaws quickly and I cook it in the oven to reduce mess from frying. When in doubt, serve bacon with anything, and everyone is happy!
The thought of being in charge of what five people are going to eat in this world on a daily basis is daunting. One day at a time, I guess…
Me and 3 of my friends were all tired of the dinner rush and chaos. So we decided to start a dinner group. We each take a night (mom-thurs) to make dinner and bring it to the other families. We can bring it right at dinner time hot and ready to go or earlier in the day and we pop it in the oven when it works for us. We each have families of 7-8 so it is a lot of people to feed but we love it! Because it is just one weeknight a week that we have to cook everyone gives it a good effort without stressing out. Luckily I have amazing cooks for friends too:) It really is the best solution and I highly recommend it!!
Brilliant, Jamie and friends! Made my day. Love this- and bonus that your families get to bond with shared meals.
Your family is so cute! Your daughter looks so much like you! Thanks for the tips. It seems safe to say we all feel better knowing this about you.
I love to cook and entertain, but I agree about the nightly dinners. I cook dinner almost every night, and during the summer we eat a lot of salad with some sort of protein. As we get into the cooler Fall months I will enjoy making lots of soups and stews and freezing them for easy meals.
You have a gift, my friend. fabulous post!
I don’t know if you are anything like me, but 2015 or not, having my husband cook a meal or two every week would quite possibly stress me out more than be helpful! He would use up ingredients I had planned for other things, or use a freezer meal I had cooked for a particular date. In order to avoid that I would have to run through all the items I had pre-purchased for future meals, or label everything. Or he would have to do his own shopping, which would be ridiculous. I guess he could cook the night before days I had already planned to go to the store, but I usually determine shopping dates by sales, not by a regular schedule. Anyway, I like to cook and prefer to just make a menu plan and prepare for dinner best I can! Love your website for the way it helps me with that!
I loved this post!! I use some of these ideas but you gave me more! I can’t wait to try that sausage and cabbage meal, sounds delicious. One thing I always have on hand is the tortelloni from Costco and pesto. It cooks in 3 minutes from FROZEN then I just pour some pesto over it and serve it with steamed broccoli or some other vegetable. Super easy and I know my kids will eat it.
Hi Mel,
Two things:
1, thank you so much for this eye-opening post, I am so happy to just know that I’m not alone in thinking about dinner all day and finally getting there and still having no (or very little) idea what I’m going to serve that my two little cuties will eat!! I’m sure I’ll think of this literally every time I am frantically trying to get through the supermarket or my pantry before picking up the kids.
2, thank you so much for the ideas!! I used the chicken sausage one tonight by buying flavored chicken sausage from my local store’s meat department and adding all the ingredients you recommended – it took me 20 minutes and was fantastic! Fast, healthy options are always appreciated and welcome, thank you!!
By the way, I just have to tell you that I rely on your site so much it’s my homepage.
Thanks for your inspiration and realistic solutions, as always.
Jennifer
Great post and I couldn’t agree more with you! I love to cook but trying to get a decent dinner on the table every night especially when I work can be exhausting. I really appreciate your fast and easy meal solutions as well as your already done menus. I turn to them often for dinner solutions. Thank you!!!
I use so many of your recipes all ready, but on crazy nights, I revert to paninis, mini meatball subs with spaghetti or pizza sauce & mozzarella or a grilled chicken and romaine salad. When we grill, I will throw an extra chicken breast or two on the grill & cut it into strips & freeze it. I also like to buy the tiny tomatoes at Costco–toss them in a bit of olive oil & balsamic vinegar, spread them on a baking pan & throw them in the oven at 400 degrees for about 10 minutes, turning them once (you just need the tomatoes to pop open–then take them out.) Cool the tomatoes a bit, chop up some romaine lettuce, add your thawed grilled chicken, tomatoes & some parmesan or mozzarella cheese & you have dinner!
I agree. I love to cook, I love to bake, but dinner every night can be a grind and it can become stressful. I am definitely a meal planner. As much as possible, I try to plan two meals that have enough leftovers for a second dinner and one meal that doesn’t. I figure that gets me through Thursday and by the end of the week, I’m either making something easy or we’re taking a break and going out. I try to plan it so leftover night is the night when it’s extra crazy around here. Our go to easy meal is pasta with steamed vegetables. My fave is broccoli with angel hair, olive oil, garlic and lots of freshly grated romano cheese. Steam the veg in the microwave and boil the pasta; takes little effort and little time. I also freeze cooked rice and marinated thin chicken breasts, either cooked or not. The rice gets quickly heated in the microwave with a little water and it tastes freshly made. The chicken either gets a quick reheat if it’s already cooked, or I throw it on the grill or quickly saute it. Thin chicken cooks faster. Steam up some frozen veg and we’re good to go. Those are just a few things we do to “make it through the night” 🙂
Gah, thank you for this post! You are such a rock star – it makes me feel better to know I’m in such good company. 🙂 I’ve got a 3 year old & a 1 year old (pregnant with the 3rd, all boys so far, just like some of my favorite food bloggers, wink, wink) and there are some weeks where I can totally have a week of homemade, nutritious balanced meals. And then other weeks, where I feel like I’m phoning it in! I too love cooking, but the steadiness of day-in, day out demands can make it feel draining. Seriously, thank goodness for food bloggers like yourself. MKC is one of my first go-to’s when I’m struggling.
I don’t think you listed it, but chili Mac comes together crazy fast too.
A variation of your aunt’s dinner is some kind of sausages sautéed, then add cabbage and onion, and finish off with Dijon mustard and a little balsamic vinegar. My family doesn’t necessarily love it but it’s a great option for leftover lunches for me! Especially topped with a fried egg…yum!
One of my new favorite ways to cook is sheet pan dinners…I use my pampered chef stoneware and roast veggies and meat together…so easy! Chicken fajitas come together really quick like that too.